Tuesday, July 5, 2016

The vast right wing conspiracy scorecard

FBI’s Comey: No charges appropriate in Clinton email case
In a bombshell announcement, FBI Director James Comey accused former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton on Tuesday of having been “extremely careless” in handling classified information on her private email server but recommended that she not face criminal charges.


BREAKING NEWS - people who hated Hillary Clinton still hate her; people who defended her still do.  More on this huge story as it develops.- John Fugelsang







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam


"Guy contributed, like, nothing to the Roman economy.  SAD!  I like Messiahs who don't get crucified" - The Theology of Donald Trump - John Fugelsang






Is The Trump War On Journalists Over?
Journalists banned from Donald Trump’s campaign events can rejoin their press colleagues in Cleveland at the Republican National Convention, an official said Tuesday.
“If they have made it through the credentialing process, yes,” Annie Tin, the House Press Gallery director, who issues credentials for the convention, said...






Republican Shenanigans


If you think Trump isn't careful about who he offends, you are wrong. He is very careful not to say anything that offends racists and misogynists. - Andy Borowitz





Hey Dorothy, Look What Happened To Kansas
Republican Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback, launched an “experiment” when he was elected in 2010 that has bankrupted the state’s economy.













If you discovered you were inspiring hordes of antisemites, would you?
a) apologize & hide 
b) insist Jews can't recognize a Star of David. - LOLGOP





Only Little People Follow Regulations
Donald Trump often boasts he made a lot of money in Atlantic City, despite the repeated failures of his casinos there, but what he does not mention is his casino empire's repeated run-ins with government regulators over broken promises---





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Obama: "I'm ready to pass the baton, and I know that Hillary Clinton is gonna take it" 





Rock The Voter News


Bill Clinton Moved to Undisclosed Location Until November Ninth - Andy Borowitz





Bill Clinton could have sex with Loretta Lynch on the tarmac and I would still vote for Hillary Clinton. She's running against Donald trump. - Paula Poundstone


Wait. Wait. The World's Worst Investigators Launching Another Investigation!
Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) told reporters on Tuesday that he will meet with House Speaker Paul Ryan (R-WI) and the House sergeant-at-arms on Tuesday afternoon to discuss whether to launch a formal investigation into the sit-in demonstration staged by House Democrats at the end of June





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Oops. Prayer Didn't Work!
A county clerk who went to jail for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples violated the state's Open Records Act, the Kentucky attorney general's office said Tuesday.







Biz/Tech News


If Donald Trump posted a flamin' cross on Twitter, his followers would call it a " Shiny Plus Sign. " - Tea Pain on Twitter






New Olympic Medal Should Be Awarded For Swimming In Sludge
A group of Brazilian scientists have detected a drug-resistant bacteria growing off the shores of some of Rio de Janeiro's most stunning beaches, one month before they're due to host the 2016 Olympic Games.


They have found a "super bacteria" in Rio waters. If the swimmers go really fast maybe they could avoid it. We should see some record times. - Paula Poundstone





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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

The Black Panther is one of the rarest animal on the planet.

Peace.

Friday, July 1, 2016

Moneyed Media


Major Political News Outlets Offer Interviews for Sale at DNC and RNC Conventions
For high-rolling special interests looking to make an impression at the presidential conventions next month, one option is to pay a lot of money to a media outlet.



Objective journalism is one of the main reasons that American politics has been allowed to be so corrupt for so long. - Hunter S. Thompson








The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam


BREAKING: America invaded by ISIS after military made too weak by Obama letting transgender individuals serve openly in the army. - Tea Party Cat







The KKK Has Rebranded Themselves!
Born in the ashes of the smoldering South after the Civil War, the Ku Klux Klan died and was reborn before losing the fight against civil rights in the 1960s. Membership dwindled, a unified group fractured, and one-time members went to prison for a string of murderous attacks against blacks. Many assumed the group was dead, a white-robed ghost of hate and violence.
Yet today, the KKK is still alive and dreams of restoring itself to what it once was: an invisible white supremacist empire spreading its tentacles throughout society. As it marks 150 years of existence, the Klan is trying to reshape itself for a new era






Ever notice how nobody hates Americans more than an American who's always bragging about how American he is? - John Fugelsang







Republican Shenanigans


Gingrich and Christie are smart VP choices to leak. Almost anyone will look better in comparison.- LOLGOP






Religion Doesn't Trump Civil Rights
Almost at the last minute, a federal judge has declared a controversial Mississippi law unconstitutional.The law, HB 1523, would have protected religious objections to gay marriage, extramarital sex and transgender identities. The judge says it favors some religious beliefs over others and would codify unequal treatment of LGBT people.


Donald Trump gave a speech at an industrial plant while standing in front of a giant wall of trash. Before the speech, Trump welcomed his new campaign manager, Mike Metaphor. - Conan O'Brien





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Rock The Voter News

Conservatives say the problem is Christianity ain't taught in schools. The real problem is Christianity ain't taught in church. - Tea Pain






Et tu, Trey?
A day after the House Benghazi committee released a final report that left Hillary Clinton relatively unscathed, conservative activists — the conspiracy-minded ones who pressured House leaders to appoint the committee in the first place — rounded on Chairman Trey Gowdy for failing to deliver the goods.



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Workers strike at Trump Taj Mahal casino
It's going to be a rough start to the holiday weekend for the Trump Taj Mahal casino in Atlantic City.
Close to 1,000 workers at the casino went on strike at 6 a.m. ET Friday after it failed to reach a deal with union negotiators, the union UNITE Here said.
The Trump Taj Mahal is owned by financier Carl Icahn. Despite the name, Donald Trump no longer runs or owns the casino.






There are only 2 things Donald Trump fears: 1) The world discovers he's been lying about being a billionaire, and 2) a strong wind. - John Fugelsang


Biz/Tech News


Now that they found water on Mars, how long before they bottle it & sell it at Whole Foods for $19? - Erik Bransyeen






Trump Whines About D.C. Taxes
Donald Trump is challenging the amount of taxes assessed by the District of Columbia against property near the White House that he is turning into a hotel.
The Trump limited liability company leasing the property filed a petition in the D.C. Superior Court tax division on Thursday, asking the court to lower the assessed value of the property for the 2015 and 2016 tax years and to direct the District to refund any tax deemed excessive.



At anger management classes in Canada, they teach people to apologize less sharply.- Kent Graham





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"If the space you’re in doesn’t have room for your voice don’t be afraid to carve out a space of your own." —Hillary tweeted today

When I read the above quote, I thought, "Wow, that's why I started All Hat No Cattle."




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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

Terraced farms sculpting the mountains in Yunnan, China.

Peace.