Tuesday, November 3, 2020

D.C. locks down over concerns of violence as nation heads to polls

Members of the National Guard have been called in to Washington, D.C., and around the White House, new fences have been erected around the presidential complex. The drama has even reached the Trump International Hotel on Pennsylvania Avenue and the mansion owned by the


Poll Shows Most Democrats Have Taken Advantage of Early Drinking. - Andy Borowitz






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Let the silence of George W. Bush, Jeb Bush and the entire Bush clan finally close the book on the fantasy that the Bushes possess even a drop of genuine leadership or moral courage. - Max Burns




Joint Chiefs of Staff Apparently Say No No To A Coup
Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Mark Milley held an off-the-record video call with top generals and network anchors this weekend to tamp down speculation about potential military involvement in the presidential election, two people familiar with the call tell Axios.


Listening to wine and drinking show tunes all day - Randy Rainbow






These Trump “caravans” disrupting traffic and putting motorists at risk are pathetic, juvenile, and dangerous. This thuggish behavior is not the American way. Everybody needs to say that. I’m happy I just did. - Dan Rather





Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Reports That Women Are Voting. - Andy Borowitz



Trumpanzees Are Targeting Democrats.


“No way I’m going to stand in line for hours just to vote!” says the person who camped out for Blink-182 tickets.- Conan O'Brien


 



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Rock The Voter News

Hunter Biden's laptops have now voted in all states and US territories. - RKJ65 tweet





Judge Puts Pressure on USPS at Last Minute
A federal judge in Washington, D.C., on Tuesday ordered the U.S. Postal Service (USPS) to sweep facilities for remaining mail ballots and rush their delivery, as receipt deadlines close in.


Wouldn’t it be great to watch Kamala make a bunch of white men cry tonight like she did to Brett Kavanaugh in 2018? - OhNoSheTwitnt







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Business/Tech News

Remember how Roy Cohn ended? Broke, disbarred, abandoned. Just sayin’. Imagine if Deutsche Bank actually does seize Donald’s “assets” after making all those bad loans to him? - Barbara Malmat tweet






I Cannot Imagine What Putin Must Have On Rudy Giuliani
It would appears Scott Atlas’ regret for doing an interview with RT did not dissuade Rudy Giuliani from giving his own interview to the Russian state-owned propaganda outlet — on Election Day, no less.


As a comedian, I voted against my self-interest. I would be thrilled to have less material. - Andy Borowitz






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Odd News


Mea Culpa Correction:
I incorrectly stated yesterday that Mt. Killamanjaro was in Japan. It is located in Tanzania, eastern Africa. I knew that but typed Japan. I blame Trump!



Time To Deflate Photo
The waves in Nazaré, Portugal, or as I like to think of it, The Great Blue Tsunami That Saved America.

Peace and love to all.


Monday, November 2, 2020

Federal agents are erecting a 'non-scalable' fence around the White House in apparent anticipation of Election Day unrest

Federal agents are erecting a 'non-scalable' fence around the White House in apparent anticipation of Election Day unrest
Federal agents are planning to erect a fence around the White House on Monday, on the eve of Election Day, according to NBC News reporter Geoff Bennett and CNN.
A federal law-enforcement source told Bennett that "crews will build a 'non-scalable' fence" on Monday "to secure the [White House] complex, Ellipse, and Lafayette Square," Bennett tweeted late Sunday.


Time to play America's favorite game, What The Fvck Is This Lunatic Going To Do Today? - Jeff Tiedrich




The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump



Can you even begin to imagine what would happen if these caravans were made up of Black people? The thought experiment is the very definition of systemic racism and White privilege. - Dan Rather







Republican Shenanigans

Trump Urges Americans to Wait in Parking Lot for Vaccine And Buses Will Pick Them Up. - Andy Borowitz




Lawyers, Start Your Engines
President Donald Trump said Sunday that he's sending in his lawyers as soon as the election ends Tuesday, his latest attack on the legitimacy of this week's unprecedented vote count.


Trump Signs Executive Order Banning Month of November. - Andy Borowitz


 




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One more day and then it's finally here! Taco Tuesday! - Stephen Colbert






Florida Woman Snaps & Damages Trump Signs. I Hear Ya, Girl.






If you're the kind of person who takes their sick child to the doctor instead of the village idiot, fire Donald Trump instead of Dr. Fauci. - Middle Age Riot

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Business/Tech News

1-star Yelp review of the United States:

"This used to be my favorite place, but a few years ago it came under new management, and it's been going downhill ever since." - Middle Age Riot


Madame Tussauds' Museum Display In Berlin, Germany. 
Danke schoen, Germany



Who Knew That Wall Street Loves Dunkin' Donuts?



1 day. Let’s win this thing. - Joe Biden






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So, how's the weather where you are?

Me: I'm left of the C in Costa Rica

Rain is forecast for the next 5 days and the ground is already oversaturated. Think I should be scared? Or nah?



Thoughts & Prayers Gladly Accepted!


Giant groundsels, prehistoric plants found on top of Mt. Kilimanjaro. Rumor has it that it was a favorite food of the brontosaurus.

Peace.

Friday, October 30, 2020

Trump changes election night plans, cancels party at Trump International: report

Trump changes election night plans, cancels party at Trump International: report
President Trump has reportedly called off plans to host an election night event at Trump International Hotel in Washington, D.C., a person familiar with the plans told The New York Times. 
The source told the Times that Trump will instead likely remain at the White House on Nov. 3. 


CNN reporting Trump has canceled plans to appear at his hotel on Election Night. Will stay at the White House instead.

He knows he’s toast. - The Hoarse Whisperer





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

A bunch of gun-toting Confederate wannabes are threatening to start a second Civil War to keep a draft-dodging Yankee in power because that's how racism works. - Middle Age Riot




Trump's Florida Rally Residue






Insiders are saying Don Jr. is going to run in 2024. Someone needs to offer his coke dealer a million dollars to wear a wire. - Edan Clay


Republican Shenanigans





Tucker Carlson Says List of Trump’s Accomplishments Got Lost In Mail. - Andy Borowitz





Jesus Would Slap The Gun Out Of This Woman's Hand


Jesus never asked a leper for a copay. - John Fugelsang


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Rock The Voter News

The way Republicans are obsessing over Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez wearing $14,000 worth of clothing in Vanity Fair you'd think she'd spent $140 million of taxpayer money to play golf at resorts she owned. - Middle Age Riot





Hundreds of Election Related Lawsuits Going Forward








The last 7 months have made me realize that house arrest is a pretty good deal for crimin’ - Edel Rodriguez 





Walmart Has Removed Guns & Ammo From Half of Its Stores. Why Only Half?


Seeing the vote turnout, in Georgia in particular, I just wish John Lewis was still around to witness this. - Dan Rather