All Hat No Cattle

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Trump won't follow New Jersey quarantine mandate during upcoming trip

Trump won't follow New Jersey quarantine mandate during upcoming trip
President Donald Trump will not abide by a new travel advisory in New Jersey requiring a quarantine period for visitors from coronavirus hotspots when he visits his Bedminster golf club this weekend.
"The President of the United States is not a civilian. Anyone who is in close proximity to him, including staff, guests, and press are tested for COVID-19 and confirmed to be negative," White House spokesman Judd Deere said in a statement.

Residents Evacuate New Jersey Ahead of Trump Visit. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

People need to stop referring to Russia’s ongoing hybrid warfare against the U.S. as “election meddling.” Putin isn’t a “Karen” sticking his nose in America’s democratic process. He’s a mob boss who runs a nuclear-armed mafia state and his goal is to destroy the United States. - Alexandra Chalupa

Anyone Taking Bets That Trump Will Catch The Coronavirus By July 4th?
A number of Trump campaign staffers tested positive for coronavirus last week ahead of the president’s big Tulsa rally. That reportedly included two Secret Service agents.
Following the rally, the Trump campaign said two additional staffers tested positive, and now all of the Secret Service agents who were on site are now apparently being told to self-quarantine

Honestly this just feels like we're on an extended episode of Punked and I really wish Ashton would just jump out right now, you got us Ashton, you got us good, please make it stop. - Sarah Cooper tweet

Republican Shenanigans

This woman on the news just said, imagine if there was a medication that reduced your chances of getting COVID by 5x. Everyone would want that medication.

Well, that's wearing a mask. - Jasmyn tweet

They're Not Even Trying To Hide Their Racism.
Three members of a North Carolina police department have been fired after a department audit of a video recording captured one of the officers saying a civil war was necessary to wipe Black people off the map and that he was ready.
The Wilmington Police Department took the action on Tuesday against Cpl. Jessie Moore, and officers Kevin Piner and Brian Gilmore. Each was accused of violating standards of conduct, criticism and use of inappropriate jokes and slurs.

in one generation we went from being the country that went to the moon to being the country that can't put on a f-cking mask. f-cking pathetic. - Jeff Tiedrich tweet

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Heaven Flush With Cash After Trump Administration Sends $1.4 Billion In Stimulus To Dead Americans - The Onion

Rock The Voter News

NY Gov. Andrew Cuomo to FL Gov. Ron DeSantis: "I say to them all, look at the numbers. You played politics with this virus and you lost."

Apparently The USA Didn't Make Costa Rica's Visitor Welcome List
The Costa Rica Tourism Board (ICT) has proposed that the government welcome visitors from the European Union and the United Kingdom, followed by Canada.
In a Wednesday press release, the ICT “respectfully requested” Costa Rica’s major international airports be allowed to accept commercial and private flights from select countries starting July 1.

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Business/Tech News

Putin Lists Trump For Sale on eBay. - Andy Borowitz

A Trump Tit For Tat? Why, Of Course!
A senior Democratic senator has demanded that President Donald Trump explain why his administration is sending thousands of ventilators to other countries without approval from Congress, questioning whether politics are affecting decisions on international aid to combat the COVID-19 pandemic, according to letters sent Wednesday and obtained by NBC News.

Today would be a great day for the Supreme Court to permit the release of Donald Trump’s financial records and leave the emperor without clothes. - Publius tweet

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Wednesday, June 24, 2020

U.S. 7-day average of coronavirus cases surges 30% from week ago

U.S. 7-day average of coronavirus cases surges 30% from week ago
As of Monday, the nation’s seven-day average of daily new Covid-19 cases increased more than 30% compared with a week ago, according to a CNBC analysis of Johns Hopkins University data.

Trump Refuses to Ramp Up Testing Because of His Hatred of Ramps. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

“I had to fire General Flynn because he lied to the Vice President and the FBI. He has pled guilty to those lies.” - Donald Trump, December 2, 2017

Proof That Masks Work!
Despite warnings from public health officials, new research suggests Black Lives Matter protests across the country have not led to a jump in coronavirus cases.
A new study, published this month by the National Bureau of Economic Research, used data on protests from more than 300 of the largest US cities, and found no evidence that coronavirus cases grew in the weeks following the beginning of the protests.

Nation’s Criminals Demand Deal Michael Flynn Got. - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

It's incredible that Republicans in Congress want Democrats to meet in the middle on police not killing black people. - DKnight10000 tweet

Barr Loses Popularity At Alma Mater
Law professors and faculty from George Washington University Law School, Attorney General William Barr's alma mater, said in a letter Tuesday he has "failed to fulfill his oath of office to 'support and defend the Constitution of the United States.' "
The rebuke comes after continued fallout over the departure of Geoffrey Berman, the federal prosecutor ousted over the weekend by the Trump administration, and adds to a chorus of criticism over Barr's actions as attorney general.

Bill Barr Orders Removal of Word Justice From DOJ Website. - Andy Borowitz

Pelosi rejects GOP calls for her to apologize after she said GOP is getting away "with murder ... the murder of George Floyd." She says on MSNBC "absolutely, positively not” she won't apologize and criticizes press for giving GOP "far too much credit for a bill that does nothing" - Manu Raju, CNN

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Just to be clear, "defendin' our monuments" is code for "defendin' our white grip on power."
Nothin' more. Nothin' less. - Tea Pain tweet

Rock The Voter News

When was the last time police pepper-sprayed members of the KKK? - Kimberley Johnson tweet

The Sad Effects of Spring Break In Florida
Florida recorded more than 5,500 new cases of COVID-19 Wednesday, an all-time high that shattered the previous record set just last week.
Cases of the virus in Florida have been surging, and there are now more than 109,000 infections reported since March 1.

A friend who works for a police department in Ohio said they received numerous calls today to investigate "Antifa dust" on the cars and driveways.

It's pollen.

And now I can't stop laughing about people calling the police on trees. - Maggie Downs tweet

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Business/Tech News

NASCAR has done more to support Bubba Wallace in the last 48 hours than the NFL has done to support Colin Kaepernick in 4 years. - Master tweet

Why Is Roundup Herbicide Still Being Sold?
Bayer will pay more than $10 billion to resolve thousands of lawsuits regarding claims that its Roundup herbicide causes cancer, the company announced on Wednesday.
Monsanto, bought by Bayer in 2018, lost a lawsuit that same year brought by a school groundskeeper who claimed its weedkiller had caused his non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Since then, thousands of U.S. lawsuits have been filed against the company.

Why is the stock market at record highs when the economy is at a record low? - Thomas Kaine tweet

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Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Anthony Fauci Contradicts Trump on 'Slow the Testing': 'None Of Us' Have Been Told to Do That

Anthony Fauci Contradicts Trump on 'Slow the Testing': 'None Of Us' Have Been Told to Do That
Dr. Anthony Fauci did an about-face on President Donald Trump’s recent coronavirus testing comments by saying neither he nor his colleagues have been told to slow testing down.

Trump Offers Stimulus Checks to Anyone Willing to Come to His Next Rally - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Trump is doing more to protect statues than American citizens. - The Lincoln Project

I’m getting pretty tired of these news cycles where we have endless dances over whether the President meant what he said. Don’t his actions speak loudly enough? - Dan Rather tweet

I Wonder How Many People Obama Would Draw If He Held A Rally For Biden
Former President Barack Obama raised more than $4 million from 120,000 individual donors ahead of his first fundraiser for presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden.
The small-dollar fundraiser Tuesday night will be held online and offers a fresh test of Obama's ability to transfer his popularity to Biden, his former vice president who is now seeking the White House on his own.

I love love love Sarah Cooper!

Republican Shenanigans

Trump Calls Drinking Glass of Water Proudest Achievement as President - Andy Borowitz

KKKentucky Has One Polling Place for Louisville
With only one polling place designated for Louisville on Tuesday, voters who didn't cast mail-in ballots or show up early could face long lines in Kentucky's primary election, the latest to unfold in a pandemic that's triggered unprecedented election disruptions across the country.

So let me get this straight: Legislation to restore the Voting Rights Act has been sitting on McConnell’s desk for months — and he will directly benefit from his state allocating just one polling place for 616,000 predominantly Black voters?

Can this be any more blatant? - Robert Reich

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Rock The Voter News

Trump made getting a test difficult. And he’s about to do the same thing with mail-in ballots. - The Lincoln Project

Death Penalty Loses Popularity
A slight majority of Americans say they think the death penalty is morally justifiable, the lowest percentage ever recorded, according to new polling from Gallup.
Of those surveyed, 54 percent said they believe capital punishment is morally acceptable, a six-point decline from 2019, according to the survey.

Trump to Hold Next Rally in Bunker - Andy Borowitz

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Business/Tech News

“I know being a cop is hard. But some jobs can’t have bad apples. Some jobs, everybody gotta be good. Like pilots. Ya know, airlines can’t be like ‘Most of our pilots like to land. We just got a few bad apples that like to crash into mountains. Please bear with us.” -Chris Rock

Soon-To-Be Coronavirus Statistic Curses Reporter
MSNBC brought a conversation with President Donald Trump’s supporters to an end after one of them called the coronavirus “Covid-1984 bullsh*t” on live TV.
Vaughn Hillyard was in Phoenix on Tuesday to cover the crowds that lined up for Trump’s event later in the day. Arizona has seen a particularly acute spike in Covid-19 cases this week, and Trump’s event there comes days after his under-attended rally in Tulsa that reportedly enraged him.

Ford Delays Launch Of New Bronco To Avoid O.J. Simpson’s Birthday - The Onion

The upside of hiking in a face mask in 80 degree weather is I inadvertently created my own mushroom grow-house. - Conan O'Brien

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