Friday, January 26, 2018

Museums are really interesting

Guggenheim museum reportedly offered the White House a golden toilet
When President Donald Trump's White House emailed the Guggenheim Museum in New York City in September and asked to borrow Vincent Van Gogh's 1888 painting "Landscape with Snow," the curator from the famed institution had a counteroffer: A fully functional 18-karat gold toilet.


Some big news about the Russian investigation. It came out that Robert Mueller wants to interview President Trump. It’s gonna be awkward when Trump tries to flee to Mexico and can’t climb over his own wall.- Jimmy Fallon





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

In honor of Trump, the Doomsday Clock now has little tiny hands. - Jeff Tiedrich







It's Gotten To The Point That Trump Should Just Deny Knowing Or Talking To Anyone In Washington D.C.
President Donald Trump denied on Friday that he had moved to fire special counsel Robert Mueller.
He had called for the firing last June, according to one person familiar with the matter. White House counsel Don McGahn refused to order the Justice Department to fire Mueller because he disagreed with the President's reasoning, the source said. However, according to the source, McGahn did not threaten to resign directly to the President.



April Ryan of CNN (June 2017): People in White House freaking out about Trump trying to fire Mueller!
New York Times (2018): Scoop! Trump tried to fire Mueller last June!
Maggie Haberman of NYT (2018): They're just really good at fooling reporters
Uh, not all reporters, Maggie - The Hoarse Whisperer tweet






Republican Shenanigans

Donald Trump is his very own impeachment starter kit. - Andy Borowitz



Yadda yadda yadda
Trump Doesn't Do Well Under Questioning
Speaking from experience, I think the president's attorneys should grab their worry beads. Trump sued me for libel in 2006 for a biography I wrote, "TrumpNation," alleging that the book misrepresented his business record and understated his wealth. Trump lost the suit in 2011, but during the litigation my lawyers deposed him under oath for two days in 2007. We had the opportunity to ask Trump about his business and banking practices, his taxes, his personal finances and his professional relationships.






Melania Says She Has No Plans to Visit Trump in Prison  - Andy Borowitz




Sexy time boys

This Dude Is Also Finance Chair of the Republican National Committee
Wynn Resorts employees and others described a CEO who sexualized his workplace and pressured workers to perform sex acts. Steve Wynn responded: ‘The idea that I ever assaulted any woman is preposterous.’







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Hey future male presidential candidates: now you all can  molest 17 women, pay porn stars for sex (all while married ) and STILL get 71% of the Evangelical vote....- Brasilmagic


Rock The Voter News


Yesterday was their wedding anniversary.
Melania Is At Mar-a-Lago. Will Trump Join Her?
First Lady Melania Trump has apparently taken an unscheduled trip to Mar-a-Lago while President Donald Trump is in Davos, Switzerland at the World Economic Summit, said The Daily Beast on Friday.
Mrs. Trump was originally scheduled to join the president in Davos, she has canceled her trip due to what a spokeswoman called “scheduling and logistical issues.”



Donald Trump quoting the Bible is like hearing a Leonard Cohen cover album by Insane Clown Posse. - John Fugelsang





Since Russia interfered in our election and nothing has been done about it, should the DEMS hire Chinese bots to help them in 2020? Fairness my friends... - Brasilmagic


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Business/Tech News



Trump plans to tell the world that America is open for business. And who better to make that declaration than a man who declared bankruptcy six different times. - Jimmy Kimmel



Opioids Overwhelming USPS
Facing an embarrassing Senate report, postal and other government officials maintained Thursday they have stepped up mail detection to find illegal and deadly drugs sent from abroad.
But they also acknowledged holes in their multi-agency, layered detection systems that allow opioids to get through.



Heart & Eye Candy



Press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said yesterday that the White House wants to see the Russia investigation “come to a complete and full conclusion.” “Uh, no you don’t…” replied Robert Mueller. - Seth Myers





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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Close-up of Lincoln Head at Mount Rushmore under construction, South Dakota, 1937. Those eyes.

Peace.


Thursday, January 25, 2018

Trump points his tiny finger

Donald Trump points finger at Samsung for lost FBI messages
Around 50,000 texts between FBI agents from December 2016 to May 2017 are apparently unrecoverable, and Trump tweets that Samsung may be to blame.


"Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind."- Albert Einstein


Raise your hand if Robert Mueller isn't interviewing you



The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

“Are we living in a porno? Because he acts like a president in a porno: ‘Immigration, crime, North Korea — is it getting hot in here?'” - Seth Myers


Rick Gates' Spokesman Dies In Afghanistan Attack
A spokesman for Rick Gates, the former Trump campaign official indicted in the Russia investigation, was killed over the weekend in Afghanistan during the bombing and siege of a hotel that catered to foreigners.






Remember when Trump fired Sally Yates for telling the truth and then allowed Michael Flynn to resign for lying? - Andy Borowitz






Republican Shenanigans





Stunning fact from 12 months of Russia/obstruction news: not ONE news item has ever exonerated the White House, even for a single news cycle. 

not one. 

- Eric Boehlert






I Think This Guy Tried To Sell Me A Used Car Once
Payday lenders appear to have a powerful friend in Washington.
Former Republican congressman Mick Mulvaney is the interim head of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. He was appointed by President Trump amid an ongoing a power struggle for control of the bureau.
Watchdog groups are up in arms because, under Mulvaney, the CFPB has put on hold a rule that would restrict payday lenders and their high-interest-rate loans. The agency has also dropped a lawsuit against online lenders charging 900-percent interest rates. 







According to The Washington Post, Robert Mueller, the special counsel, wants to interview President Trump. The main thing will be to get him to answer questions between bites of cheeseburger.- Jimmy Kimmel


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White House Doctor Writes Note Saying Trump Too Sick to Talk to Mueller. - Andy Borowitz


Rock The Voter News



Is The Mueller Squeeze Working?
Former Trump campaign aide Rick Gates has quietly added a prominent white-collar attorney, Tom Green, to his defense team, signaling that Gates' approach to his not-guilty plea could be changing behind the scenes.






Today a White House adviser compared President Trump to Houdini, because “if you keep him in a cage, he’s gonna get out.” When asked how he knows that, he said, “’Cuz we put him in a cage... and he got out.”- Jimmy Fallon




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Business/Tech News

We know Trump watches Fox News commercials because he just put a reverse mortgage on the White House. - Conan O'Brien







The Vendetta Against Samsung
Behold, the tariff-man cometh. During his presidential campaign, Donald Trump consistently riffed on the idea that the United States was losing, most notably on trade. Post-election Trump has somewhat cooled on the rhetoric and has rebuffed advisors that advocate for radical trade actions. That all changed this month with the administration unveiling the first of its protectionist policies... Acting on a request from Whirlpool (NYSE: WHR), the Trump administration slapped tariffs on washing machines, targeting South Korean conglomerates Samsung (NASDAQOTH: SSNLF) and LG Electronics. In the end, the world's largest publicly traded company, Apple (NASDAQ: AAPL) could be dragged into the fray.





New Study Finds Americans Need 6 Hours Of Sleep At Work - The Onion





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NOTICE: I don't think I am completely over the flu yet. I fell asleep yesterday midway through posting AHNC. Mea culpa.

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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Mstislav Rostropovich playing Bach as the Berlin Wall falls in 1989.

Peace.


Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Man threatens to shoot CNN employees

Michigan man arrested after caller threatens to kill CNN employees
Authorities arrested a Michigan man last week after he allegedly called CNN several times, threatening to kill employees at the network's Atlanta, Georgia, headquarters, according to a federal affidavit.
Brandon Griesemer made 22 calls to CNN on January 9 and January 10 and four calls, which were recorded, contained threats, according to the affidavit, which was unsealed Friday.


I used to love to wake up in the morning when Barack Obama was president. Now I am afraid to wake up.





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Funny how the trolls who keep calling other ppl "cuck" are also the ones who let Putin come in and screw America while they quietly watched in the corner. - John Fugelsang







Haiti Protests Trump
About two thousand people took to the streets of Haiti's capital on Monday to protest comments attributed to U.S. President Donald Trump about the nation being a "shithole" country, which caused uproar in the world's first independent black republic.











ICE Agents Hurl Pregnant Immigrant Over Mexican Border To Prevent Birth On U.S. Soil - The Onion





Republican Shenanigans

Number of Democratic Attorneys General who've ever been grilled by FBI  agents about their role in a foreign country trying to hijack a US election: - 0. - Eric Boehlert





Melania Shuns Switzerland After Porn Star Revelations
First lady Melania Trump, in a change of plans, will not be joining President Donald Trump on his trip to the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, later this week.




Trump actually has two cellphones that his staff nicknamed “Trump One” and “Trump Two.” Sounds a little like something out of a Dr. Seuss book.- Jimmy Fallon




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Weird, but I'm convinced electing more women is the only way Democrats in Congress will grow some balls. - Randi Mayem Singer





Rock The Voter News

President Trump is now claiming his approval rating among black Americans has doubled. In other words, Ben Carson voted twice. - Conan O'Brien






The Inhumanity Of It All
The U.S. border patrol arrested an activist with an organization that tries to prevent border crossing deaths hours after the group released video of agents dumping water left at the border.


Mitch McConnell's deal with Schumer & the Dems rests entirely on Mitch's promise to Charlie Brown that he won't pull the football away this time. -John Fugelsang





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Business/Tech News

Chain migration is a real thing. You let a guy into the White House, and next thing you know, his son-in-law and daughter are running the government. - Will Saletan






Puerto Rico To Privatize Electric Authority 
Puerto Rico Gov. Ricardo Rosselló announced Monday he will privatize the island's crippled, broke and decrepit electric energy authority, which he said has become a heavy burden to residents and has been hampering economic recovery.


If you are in Washington, D.C., an exciting time to visit the White House is 1-3PM, when they feed live lizards to Stephen Miller. - Conan O'Brien





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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

The stone of love and desire, in Norway. Yeah, I love that I have no desire to stand there.

Peace.