All Hat No Cattle: The Patriot Act Effect

Republicans are at war with each other over the Patriot Act
Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell is digging in hard behind his insistence that we must extend NSA bulk metadata surveillance for ever…and ever…and ever…and ever — or at least until 2020. But now McConnell is running into opposition from multiple quarters: From a left-right alliance in the Senate that is determined to end bulk surveillance, and now, from House Republicans, too.

Weird. We survived for 225 years without the PATRIOT Act.- LOLGOP

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

You know a Bush brother is losing it on Iraq when he starts talking about how scary same-sex marriage is.- LOLGOP

Jeb Blames Obama
During a tough campaign week focused on the Iraq War, former Gov. Jeb Bush shifted blame for problems there to President Barack Obama, saying that Obama’s actions helped hand the country over to Islamic State.

Watching the Republicans defend the Iraq War is almost as good as watching them actually fight one.- Kona Lowell

Republican Shenanigans

Turns our the Mark of the Beast in Revelation was health insurance and bakin' gay weddin' cakes. Who knew? - TeaPartyPain Tweet

Imagine: A Highly Educated Country
Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders wants to take from the rich in order to make public college tuition-free for everyone else.

On Tuesday, the Vermont senator will hold a press conference in the nation's capital at which he will introduce a plan to use a so-called Robin Hood tax on stock transactions to fund tuition at four-year public colleges and universities.

Unsuccessful presidential candidates should be forced to spend the next four years in a minimum wage job. As a society we need a deterrent like this.- Andy Borowitz

Rock The Voter News

It's just a shame @POTUS joined Twitter too late to live-tweet the Romney-Holyfield fight. - The Daily Edge

The Zimmerman Saga Continues
The Florida man charged with shooting George Zimmerman had a “fixation” with his target and recently spent time in a mental institution, police said.

Amtrak's Locomotive Engineers Want Second Engineer At Controls
The union for Amtrak's locomotive engineers on Tuesday urged the railroad to put a second engineer at the controls of trains on the busy Northeast Corridor, where a derailment killed eight people and injured more than 200 others.

I just want to make sure that you're in a straight marriage, which has a 50% shot of ending in infidelity and divorce, because I have morals.- LOLGOP

Big Government Haters Under Big Government's Thumb
Texas lawmakers have made it clear you don’t mess with Texas when it comes to extracting fossil fuels. Even if you’re a Texan.
On Monday, Texas governor Greg Abbott signed legislation that prohibits cities across Texas from banning hydraulic fracturing from their home turf.

Business/Tech News

Jesus disdained wealth, said help the poor, chased capitalists from the Temple & was obviously funded by George Soros.- John Fugelsang

Spy War Update
The U.S government charged three Chinese professors and three other Chinese nationals with economic espionage and stealing trade secrets from two companies that develop technology often used in military technologies, the Department of Justice said on Tuesday.

We had rain this morning and thunderstorms last night. That doesn't happen much here in L.A. You could hear people screaming. We are so scared of rain here, you would think it had gluten in it.- Jimmy Kimmel