All Hat No Cattle

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

NATO leaders caught on camera mocking Trump

NATO leaders caught on camera mocking Trump
The leaders of Britain, Canada, France and the Netherlands have been caught on camera at a Buckingham Palace reception mocking US President Donald Trump's lengthy media appearances ahead of Wednesday's NATO summit.

Hey, remember when our president won every trade war and got Kim Jong-un to give up his nukes and won the Nobel Peace Prize? me neither, but I do remember when the fragile little man-baby stormed out of a NATO summit because Trudeau made fun of his batsh-t insane press conference. - Jeff Tiedrich

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

NATO summit summary: Donald Trump acts like a lunatic, other NATO leaders talk about his lunacy, and then he gets mad and runs home like a lunatic. - George Conway

Trump's Fixer Is In Europe Fixing
Even as Democrats intensified their scrutiny this week of Rudolph W. Giuliani’s role in the pressure campaign against the Ukrainian government that is at the heart of the impeachment inquiry, Mr. Giuliani has been in Europe continuing his efforts to shift the focus to purported

Jilted Trump Announces Formation Of Cooler, Way More Powerful NATO With His New Best Friends Oman, Macedonia, And Suriname. - The Onion

Republican Shenanigans

Bill Clinton almost lost his job as POTUS for lying about an affair.

Trump has lied about several affairs and jeopardized our national security by using the power of his presidency to try to influence an election.

Dear GOP, Practice what you impeach. - OhNoSheTwint

Trump Aims To Starve Poor People
The Trump administration is tightening work requirements for some food stamp recipients, a change that is expected to eliminate Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program benefits for 688,000 adults.
The new rule makes it more difficult for states to waive a requirement that able-bodied adults without children work at least 20 hours a week or else lose their benefits.

Trump Announces Plan To Replace Food Stamps With New Low-Income Foraging Program. - The Onion

The Republican witness, Jonathan Turley, claims impeachment "makes his dog mad." Yeah, this is where we are. - Tea Pain

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One-Eyed Man Who Kamala Harris Locked Up 25 Years Ago Quietly Removes Tulsi Gabbard Mask. - The Onion

Rock The Voter News

Mark Penn, the former Clinton pollster now advising Trump on how to beat impeachment, told him to “govern” and focus on “substance” without reacting to every development. Penn might as well have told Trump to go without Diet Coke and a hair dryer. - Dana Milbank

The Buying of a Presidency?
Michael Bloomberg is dropping tens of millions of dollars on a new national television ad, according to a report from The Associated Press.
The buy is in addition to Bloomberg’s already-outsize spending on advertising. When he entered the race for the Democratic presidential nomination late last month, the billionaire businessman and former New York City mayor rolled out a $37 million ad buy spanning roughly 100 media markets.

Asked by Howard Stern if she's "upset" with Bernie Sanders for taking his time endorsing her in 2016, Hillary Clinton replies, "No, disappointed. And I hope he doesn't do it again to whoever gets the nomination. Once is enough."

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Business/Tech News

So once again, the GOP is complaining not about the crimes......but that they got caught. - Steve Marmel

I Wonder If The World Leaders Will Show
Trump reveals that next G-7 summit will be at Camp David.
The move comes after Trump received major blowback from his initial decision to host next year's meeting at his Doral resort.

I've never been talented, I'm just good at not giving up.

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FALL FUNDRAISER

Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Birds of a feather flock together

Donald Trump Says 'I Don't Know Prince Andrew,' Despite Meeting With The Royal Before Epstein's Arrest
President Donald Trump has attempted to distance himself from Prince Andrew by claiming he "doesn't know" the under-fire royal despite meeting with him several times down the years.

Three quarters of Americans can't name all three branches of our government.

A full third can only name one.

Still wondering how we got here?

#TeachCivicsAgain - fen tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

NATO Leaders Challenge Trump To Spell NATO. - Andy Borowitz

Trump's House of Ukraine Cards Is Tumbling Down
A former deputy foreign minister said in a new interview that Ukraine was aware of a U.S. freeze in military aid as early as July, marking the first public acknowledgement from an official in Kyiv that the country knew about President Trump’s move to withhold the assistance.

Meanwhile, Back in North Korea
President Trump on Tuesday revived the “Rocket Man” nickname he has used to refer to North Korean leader Kim Jong Un while discussing relations with Pyongyang...He added: “I have confidence in him. I like him, he likes me, we have a good relationship … We’ll see what happens. It may work out, it may not.”
“If I weren’t president, you’d be in a war right now in Asia, and who knows where that leads,” he continued.

Queen Elizabeth Says Bone Spurs Will Prevent Her From Meeting With Trump. - Any Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Melania Trump Hangs Decayed Badger Carcass Over White House Mantel To Finish Off Traditional Slovenian Christmas Decor - The Onion

An Evangelical Pedophile in Alabama. Who Would've Thunk?
An Alabama evangelist pleaded guilty this morning in an Etowah County courtroom to 28 counts of sexual abuse involving six victims.
Paul Acton Bowen, charged in both Jefferson County and Etowah counties, was facing criminal charges, including enticing a child for sexual act, sodomy, traveling to meet a child for sexual act and sexual abuse involving six different victims between the ages of 13 and 16.

Rudy Giuliani’s resting face is “Oh no, did I just stitch up this patient with my car keys inside him???” - Conan O'Brien

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Rock The Voter News

Majority Of Americans Favor Changing White House Locks While Trump Is Overseas. - Andy Borowitz

Banks Must Give Trump's Financial Records to the US House
Two banks must turn over President Donald Trump's financial records to the Democrat-controlled US House of Representatives, dealing another blow to the President's efforts to block Congress' move to obtain his financial records, a federal appeals court in New York ruled Tuesday.

The White House has identified the legal scholars who Trump says reviewed the transcripts and deemed them "absolutely perfect": Moses Horwitz, Louis Feinberg and Jerome Horwitz. Asked to comment, Jerome Horwitz (whose nickname is Curly) cryptically responded “Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.” - Jon Cooper

To my supporters, it is with deep regret—but also with deep gratitude—that I am suspending my campaign today.

But I want to be clear with you: I will keep fighting every day for what this campaign has been about. Justice for the People. All the people. - Kamala Harris

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Business/Tech News

No, Mark, it’s not that “complex.” Let me simplify (again): you and Facebook take money from politicians and run their ads — even if they’re not true — without fact-checking them. That’s not democracy, that’s you profiting off propaganda. - Sacha Baron Cohen

22 Billion for 9 Submarines! What a Deal!
The U.S. Navy will spend about $22 billion to purchase nine new nuclear-powered Virginia-class submarines as it seeks to maintain superiority over China's growing Navy.
According to a Navy release Tuesday, the commission for the new ships will be fulfilled by General Dynamics Electric Boat and subcontractor Huntington Ingallls Industries at a shipyard in Rhode Island employing thousands of workers.

To all the candidates, staff, and volunteers who have worked their hearts out for presidential campaigns that have ended—remember that fighting for what you believe in is always worth it. - Hillary Clinton

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FALL FUNDRAISER

Monday, December 2, 2019

Trump, lawyers won’t participate in upcoming impeachment hearing

Trump, lawyers won’t participate in upcoming impeachment hearing
President Donald Trump and his lawyers will not participate in Wednesday’s impeachment hearing in the House Judiciary Committee, according to a letter from the White House to the committee.

White House Begins Christmas Season With Ceremonial Lighting Of Cross. - The Onion

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Trump Asks Troops in Afghanistan to Dig Up Dirt on Biden. - Andy Borowitz

The President of the United States Fakes Orgasm
It’s not often that you interview a subject who has no interest in being famous. But recently, I did just that when I sat down with Lisa Page the week before Thanksgiving in my hotel room in Washington, D.C. Page, of course, is the former FBI lawyer whose text-message exchanges with agent Peter Strzok that belittled Donald Trump and expressed fear at his possible victory became international news. They were hijacked by Trump to fuel his “deep state” conspiracy.
For the nearly two years since her name first made the papers, she’s been publicly silent (she did have a closed-door interview with House members in July 2018). I asked her why she was willing to talk now. “Honestly, his demeaning fake orgasm was really the straw that broke the camel’s back,” she says. The president called out her name as he acted out an orgasm in front of thousands of people at a Minneapolis rally on Oct. 11.

Whatever Russia's reason is for meddling in our elections, you can be pretty goddamn sure it isn't to Make America Great Again. - Middle Age Riot

Putin couldn’t have done it without the help of the GOP. From his attack on the 2016 U.S. election to his coverup since, Moscow’s greatest ally in hybrid warfare against America is the Republican Party. - Alexandra Chalupa

Republican Shenanigans

Sen. Kennedy, why are you parroting Russian propaganda that U.S. intelligence officials tell us are designed to divide our country? Did you miss the briefing that day? - Hillary Clinton

The Golf Grifter-in-Chief
With his Thanksgiving vacation, President Donald Trump’s golf hobby has now cost Americans an estimated $115 million in travel and security expenses ― the equivalent of 287 years of the presidential salary he frequently boasts about not taking.
Of that amount, many hundreds of thousands ― perhaps millions ― of dollars have gone into his own cash registers, as Secret Service agents, White House staff and other administration officials stay and eat at his hotels and golf courses.

When a white American can speak more than one language:

“Wow, they are so smart!”

When an immigrant or Person of Color can speak more than one language:

“Speak English!”

The difference is racism. - Rachel R. Gonzales