Monday, October 15, 2018

Elizabeth Warren's DNA reveals Native American blood

Trump Says He Never Pledged $1 Million To Charity If Warren Took DNA Test. He Did.
When a reporter confronted President Trump on Monday over his pledge to donate $1 million to charity if Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) took a DNA test to prove she had Native American ancestry, Trump denied he ever made the commitment.
“I didn’t say that. You better read it again,” Trump said.


DNA tests are like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get.


Weird how every Deplorable on twitter is suddenly an expert on Native American genealogy, who knew there were so many esteemed scholars living in their parents' mold-infested basements. -Jeff Tiedrich




The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

The Saudis have been buying American military equipment for decades. They can't just switch over to flying Russian airplanes overnight.  They also can't sell their oil to Russia. They are much more dependent on us than we are on them. - Michael McFaul, former US Ambassador to Russia



Something Bad Is Gonna Happen. Real Bad.
Arthur House currently serves as the chief cybersecurity risk officer in the state of Connecticut and he is warning Americans that we might not survive an attack that cripples our utilities. He wants the federal government to get a plain in place -- NOW.





I know General Mattis. I've worked with him on some of our most challenging national security issues. He is brilliant. 
When asked about Mattis' statements on NATO, Trump said, "I know more about it than he does."
I'm numb with concern. Words escape me... - George Capen




Republican Shenanigans

The irony of Twitter in 2018 is that the more American flags a profile has, the more likely it's Russian. - John Fugelsang


When All Else Fails, Call DNA Junk Science
Kellyanne Conway, counselor to President Donald Trump, on Monday suggested that Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) had used “junk science” to prove that she had Native American ancestors.



Kanye is in my office and he won’t leave. - Conan O'Brien




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Don't worry America, everything will change after November 6, because that's when the asteroid hits. -TheTweetOfGod

Rock The Voter News




“Trump voters will surely be swayed by a DNA test from a world-class geneticist,” thought Elizabeth Warren about a group of people who were convinced Hillary had Stage 5 Dementia because she coughed once. - Jason O. Gilbert




Trump Thinks It's A Deterrent To Cage Children. I Think It's Terrorism. 
When it came to questions about immigration and President Donald Trump’s policy to take children away from their parents, the president swore, inaccurately, that President Barack Obama did the same thing.













Trump DNA Test Reveals Moron Ancestry - Andy Borowitz

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Business/Tech News

As Saudi Arabia threatens massive economic reprisals against the US if held to account for the disappearance of a WashPo columnist, a friendly reminder that the Trump administration formally labeled America's top source of imported oil, Canada, a threat to national security. - David Frum




The Military Industrial Complex Is Growing
Harris Corp. and L3 Technologies Inc. aren’t exactly household names. A new deal could change that.
The defense contractors agreed to a merger that will form one of the industry’s largest players, a $33.5 billion behemoth to challenge weapons makers such as Raytheon Co. and Northrop Grumman Corp. With product lines spanning communications and electronics, the newly formed L3 Harris Technologies Inc. is poised to capitalize on military spending increases under U.S. President Donald Trump.



This painting is hanging in the White House. Luckily Trump Was Able To Commission The Dude Who Paints Dogs Playing Cards
Click pic for a larger view


67 million Americans don’t speak English at home. This includes my family because we don’t say a word to each other. - Conan O'Brien





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The last tropical depression we had down here turned into Hurricane Michael. We have a new one. It's not going anywhere except Central America. Here's a satellite screenshot.




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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
Six years ago yesterday Felix Baumgartner became the first person to break the speed of sound in free fall. Is he taking a selfie?

Peace.

Friday, October 12, 2018

Just one.

Trump may not be crazy, but the rest of us are getting there fast
Psychologists’ couches are filling up as Americans seek relief from Trump Anxiety Disorder.


The saddest part about Trump bringing a mentally ill rapper to the White House to take the media's focus off climate change, the election, and his tax evasion is that it totally worked. - Matt Oswalt




The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Putin’s killing people in the U.K., the Chinese regime has created a massive Uighur gulag, and the Saudis have murdered a journalist who was living here. None seems to fear serious consequences from the Trump administration, as the world becomes a darker and more dangerous place. - Bill Kristol

Trump Knew.
What did U.S. intelligence and the White House know about the disappearance of Jamal Khashoggi—and when did they know it? Those are the Top Secret questions haunting Washington right now. A National Security Agency official tells me that the codebreakers, as usual, have some answers.





I feel about Kanye, the same way I feel about Roseanne.It’s not about the political opinion they have every right to hold. It’s about their mental state. I sincerely hope people in their lives who care for them, and are not in it just to exploit them, get them professional help. - Ana Navarro



Trump Breaks Another Promise
Over the course of 12 months, the U.S. Army discharged more than 500 immigrant enlistees who were recruited across the globe for their language or medical skills and promised a fast track to citizenship in exchange for their service, The Associated Press has found.









Republican Shenanigans




Trump boasting that he "got Obama to show the birth certificate" makes him the 1st man in history to brag that somebody proved he's a liar. - John Fugelsang

Most Americans Are Smart
More Americans oppose Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh's confirmation than support it, according to a new ABC News/Washington Post poll.



New Bill Would Limit Abortion To Cases Where Procedure Necessary To Save Promising Political Career - The Onion

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Melania thinks she's the victim after helping drag Obama through the mud - demanding to see his birth certificate.
Melania, show us the University degree you claim to have. - Victor Stoddard


Rock The Voter News






Georgia Needs Jimmy Carter To Monitor Their Election
Georgia Democrat Stacey Abrams' campaign is calling on Republican Secretary of State Brian Kemp to resign following a report his office is using a controversial verification law to effectively suppress the minority vote in their race to become the state's next governor.






Indiana purged 460k voters. 
Georgia is freezing 50k newly registered Black voters
North Dakota is disenfranchising thousands of Native Americans 
Florida’s voter registration site went down two days before the deadline (and they never fixed it). 
Republicans cheat to win. - Nathan H. Rubin



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Trump’s Defense is now saying the crimes Cohen pleaded guilty to aren’t crimes... Wow... Crimes aren’t crimes... The truth isn’t the truth... it’s starting to feel more and more like the President isn’t really the President. - Cyrus McQueen


Business/Tech News




Kanye goes on a crazy rant he gets on SNL... Kavanaugh goes on a crazy rant, he gets on the Supreme Court... But when I go on a crazy rant, they STILL make me pay for that extra sweet n sour sauce for my McNuggets. - Cyrus McQueen



The Result Of For-Profit Pharmacy Companies
When insulin was first developed as a medical treatment in the early 1900s, it cost the equivalent of about $25 a month — now, the vials sell for $250 a pop, totaling anywhere from $500 to several thousand dollars per month






"That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons that history has to teach." -  Aldous Huxley




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I hope you had a good time today!




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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Galapagos tortoise family out for a stroll.

Peace.

Thursday, October 11, 2018

How's Melania's anti-bullying campaign going?

Melania Trump: 'I'm the most bullied person on the world'
First lady Melania Trump said in an interview that aired Thursday that she is the most bullied person in the world, which has ...


Melania Says When She Claimed She Was Most Bullied Person in World She Totally Forgot About Jeff Sessions - Andy Borowitz




The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump



My favorite part of the Bible is where Jesus gives money to the rich, tells the poor to suck it up and asks for Caesar's birth certificate. - Rex Huppke





Kavanaugh Under Judicial Investigation
Chief Justice John Roberts on Wednesday referred ethics complaints about the Supreme Court’s newest associate justice, Brett Kavanaugh, to the 10th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Colorado.
The complaints, related to comments Kavanaugh made during his contentious confirmation hearings last month, were originally filed with the D.C. Circuit Court of Appeals, where Kavanaugh served as a federal judge before his confirmation on Saturday. Roberts made the request in a letter to Chief Judge Timothy Tymkovich of the 10th Circuit, which also covers Kansas, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Utah and Wyoming.


Kavanaugh Issues Ruling On Miller v Bud Light - Andy Borowitz




Anyone know what time left-wing-mob training is today? - Rex Huppke

Republican Shenanigans



As usual, President Obama had it right: Kanye is a jackass. - Denizcan Grimes





My God, These Trumpsters Will Believe Anything
A subset of Trump supporters now believe that John F. Kennedy Jr., who died in a plane crash in 1999, is still alive and secretly attending Trump rallies.


The Kanye West monologue in the White house was like a car accident hit a train wreck and then they both slammed into a fireworks factory. - Dean Obeidallah




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Child Imprisoned at Border Grateful Not to Be Bullied Like Melania Trump - Andy Borowitz

Rock The Voter News






Kanye West says he thinks of Trump as a father. Guess who doesn’t think of Kanye as a son? - Chelsea Handler



Trump's Ex-lawyer Turns Democrat. Is He Allowed To Vote?
Donald Trump’s former “fixer” and attorney Michael Cohen has registered with the Democratic Party in his latest rebuke of the president.





Wouldn't this be nice if true...



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Business/Tech News

"I'm going to make the stock market crash in ways Obama never could,"Trump bragged. - Andy Borowitz





Facebook Attempts To Purge Garbage. Yawn.
Facebook says it is removing 559 pages and 251 accounts that “have consistently broken ... rules against spam and coordinated inauthentic behavior.”


We get it, Kanye - you love giant asses. - John Fugelsang



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Odd News




Time To Deflate Photo

A perfect second in time captured.

Peace.