All Hat No Cattle

Friday, August 24, 2018

Multiple Immunities granted by Mueller

Trump Organization financial chief Weisselberg 'given immunity'
The Trump Organization's finance boss, Allen Weisselberg, has reportedly been granted legal immunity in the probe into Michael Cohen. He was summoned to ..

Please can it be a porn star and a guy named Pecker who bring the pussy grabber down? - Randi Mayem Singer

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

I nominate Martin Scorsese to direct the Donald Trump biopic. His body of work - Goodfellas, Gangs of New York, etc - suggests he has done a great job bringing similar characters to life on film. - Dan Rather

This Administration Needs To Join Liars Anonymous
Pakistan has called for the United States to amend what its foreign ministry described as a “factually incorrect” account of a phone call between U.S. Secretary of State Michael R. Pompeo and new Prime Minister Imran Khan.

Betsy DeVos is considering a plan that would allow states to use federal funds to buy teachers guns. They’ll still have to ask parents to donate tissues & glue sticks, though. - Bette Midler

Republican Shenanigans

Mueller is doing to Trump what he did to Enron. He is going brick by brick until the whole organization falls and crumbles. It’s a fun game of jenga. - irishygirl

Republican Congressman Blames Wife
Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-CA), who along with his wife has been charged with and pleaded not guilty to allegations of illegally using campaign funds and attempting to conceal the misuse in federal records, put the blame squarely on his wife’s shoulders Thursday.

Have you ever noticed that Trump never mentions Rachel Maddow? Of all the journalists he slams, he never utters her name. Why? Because he's very, very afraid of her. He basically does not bash the ones he’s afraid of. Another example: Avenatti. - Brasilmagic tweet

The question is, when does Murdoch give Fox News the go ahead to 'flip' on Donald Trump ? - Roland Scahill

This Is One Of Those Times I Put Politics Aside.
Thank You, John McCain, For Your Service To Our Country.
Sen. John McCain will no longer be seeking medical treatment for stage-four brain cancer, his family announced on Friday.

Nothing but respect for John McCain. A dedicated life of service to his country. Donald Trump would do well to take even a sentence from a page of John McCain’s book. - Rob Reiner

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Rock The Voter News

This is an actual cover of the National Enquirer in 2015

It’s amazing Hillary is even alive considering she had two strokes, lung cancer, is in jail, gained 103 lbs, falls down constantly, almost died of the flu on 9/11, and only had 6 months to live. - AngryBlackLady tweet

Way To Go, Georgia!
A Georgia county’s board of elections on Friday voted down a proposal to shutter seven of its nine polling sites over concerns that doing so would disenfranchise the area’s majority-black population.

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The media keeps wondering whether DT’s diehard fans would finally bail if they heard a tape of him saying the N-word. In reality, for that to happen there would have to be a tape of him saying “black lives matter.” - John Fugelsang

Business/Tech News

Why Does This Remind Me Of a YUGO?
The Russian manufacturer of the infamous AK-47 assault rifle has unveiled a prototype vehicle that it claims can compete with Elon Musk's Tesla range.

Mexico has volunteered to pay for the walls that are closing in on Trump. - Andy Kindler

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Thursday, August 23, 2018

As The World Burns...

South Africa blasts Trump for telling State Dept to look into "large scale killing" of white farmers
President Trump on Tuesday said he's asked Secretary of State Mike Pompeo to look into "land farm seizures" and the "large scale killing of farmers" in South Africa after Fox News host Tucker Carlson aired a segment on the topic.

Study: Nation Could Save Millions by Impeaching Pence at Same Time - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

I liked the "sex isn't sex" administration so much better than the "truth isn't truth" one. - Randi Mayem Singer

War On Hillary Soon To Enter Third Decade
The president’s personal attorney called on Attorney General Jeff Sessions to prosecute Hillary Clinton over the 2016 election.

First Lady Melania Trump addresses conference on cyberbullying and then returns to her day job: sitting in her room and waiting for Donald to die. - Jeff Tiedrich

Pence Asked Jesus To Rapture Him Up Before Mueller Indicts Him - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

"Lock her up" chants about Hillary Clinton at a Trump rally on the day Trump's campaign manager and personal lawyer get jail time is really GOP politics right now in a nutshell. - Ezra Klein

One Holdout Juror Saved Manafort
Manafort juror reveals a single holdout prevented Mueller’s team from convicting on all counts
Paul Manafort narrowly escaped an estimated 300-plus years in prison, according to one juror interviewed by Fox News Wednesday.

Mitch McConnell Shatters Usain Bolt’s Speed Record While Running From Reporter - Andy Borowitz

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A full month has passed since the deadline for the administration to reunite families it separated at the border, but 565 children are still waiting to see their parents again. - Hillary Clinton tweet

Rock The Voter News

Trump Boys Frantically Burning Stacks Of Printed-Out Emails To Eliminate Paper Trail - The Onion

I miss your smokey eye Sarah.

Sarah Sanders Shrugs Off #BeBest
White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Wednesday dismissed the fact that President Donald Trump had hired multiple convicted felons who have worked either for his administration or as part of his presidential campaign.
When one reporter asked Sanders about whether Trump broke his promise that he would only hire “the best” people to work for him, Sanders shrugged it off by claiming that only a small percentage of the president’s employees had been convicted of felonies.

The fact that Sarah Huckabee Sanders still defends Donald Trump is amazing. He could be in prison and Sarah Huckabee would say he’s staying at an Airbnb. - Chelsea Handler

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Business/Tech News

I hate when people make Trump out to be this strategic character and aware...
He is a buffoon who was given a lot of money, bankrupted a lot of companies, paid off a lot of women, and hires horrible people.
He isn’t playing chess. He is playing solitaire with baseball cards. - Tony Posnanski

CNN Reporter Hires Bodyguard
Few reporters have lived the Trump administration's war against the press more vividly than April Ryan, a 21-year veteran of the White House press corps who has seen her national profile grow along with concerns about her physical safety.
"They've put a target on my head.... I've had death threats. I've had craziness," said Ryan, who revealed to The Hollywood Reporter that she recently hired a bodyguard to protect her. "All I'm going to say for my safety is: I have a team." (She said the White House should pay for her protection.)

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. - Steven Wright

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Wednesday, August 22, 2018

It's Mueller Time!

Avenatti on Trump’s ‘fatal mistake’: ‘He should have shown loyalty to Michael Cohen’
"Donald Trump made a fatal mistake, and that is when he was elected to the presidency, he didn't take Michael Cohen with him," Avenatti, who is mulling a Democratic presidential campaign in 2020, said.

If only there were precedent for a Republican Congress impeaching a President for crimes associated with covering up an affair. - Tim Miller

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Stunning that Trump’s defenders are down to “you can’t indict a sitting president” as their last and only talking point. - Nicolle Wallace

How Many Crimes Has Cohen Committed?
Investigators in New York state have issued a subpoena to Michael Cohen as part of their criminal probe into the Trump Foundation.
A spokesman for Democratic Gov. Andrew Cuomo’s tax department confirmed the subpoena to The Associated Press on Wednesday.

BREAKING: The White House is on lockdown after someone hurled a TV out of the second story window. - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Folks, not to get too political on here, but it seems like the guy who brags about his hiring ability so much he even had a TV show about it kinda sucks at hiring people. - OhNoSheTwint

Swamp Gas Alert!
Republican megadonors Sheldon and Miriam Adelson combined to give $25 million last month to the Senate Leadership Fund, a super PAC dedicated to protecting the GOP majority in the U.S. Senate.

I'm glad the media is using her full name, "Omarosa Manigault-Newman," so I don't get her confused with other Omarosas. - Conan O'Brien

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Rock The Voter News

Michael Cohen should be sentenced to be Hillary Clinton’s butler for 10 years - Roland Scahill

Michael Cohen Tries To Delete Karma
A day after pleading guilty to a swarm of criminal charges, Michael Cohen deleted a gloating tweet predicting that Hillary Clinton would end up in jail.

Same people screaming “they broke the law!” about terrified Central American moms who committed a *misdemeanor* suddenly not so into “zero tolerance” where law-breaking is concerned. - Chris Hayes

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