Thursday, April 26, 2018

Trump goes on Twitter Tirade

Trump's comments cause him legal headaches — again
President Donald Trump's penchant for freewheeling chatter on issues being litigated in court landed him in hot water again Thursday, potentially upending his attorneys' strategy in ongoing court battles involving his personal lawyer Michael Cohen


Trump’s Mouth Wired Shut on Advice of Legal Team - Andy Borowitz







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

I've known comedians who have done cocaine and stayed up all night and they sounded just like trump on fox & friends. - Dean Obeidallah



Trump Tweets This Morning, Federal Prosecutors Use It In Court Filing
Federal prosecutors in New York argued on Thursday that public statements by President Trump and Fox News host Sean Hannity signal that materials seized from Michael Cohen are unlikely to contain large amounts of privileged information.




What Trump thinks of his tweet vs what everyone else thinks about it



Republican Shenanigans

Diamond and Silk are lying so much in their testimony, they're gonna have to change their name to Zirconia and Polyester.- Nick Jack Pappas



IT'S CALLED DRAGON ENERGY, IT'S A NEW THING KANYE AND I HAVE



Publicist Worried Kanye West’s Support Of Trump Will Damage His Carefully Crafted Public Image As A Manic Self-Absorbed Lunatic- The Onion



My My My. One More Thing For Trump To Be Mad At. Here Come Da Judge.
The first look at documents seized from Donald Trump’s longtime personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, will go to Barbara Jones, who cut her teeth as a mob prosecutor, presided as a judge over white-collar crime cases including corporate chieftain Bernie Ebbers, and oversaw the arbitration of NFL running back Ray Rice.



Kanye: I am the craziest Trump supporter and will do absolutely anything for money.

Diamond and Silk: Hold our beer.

Dr. Ronny Jackson: No problem.

- Mith







Jeff Sessions Desperately Trying To Keep His Job
Attorney General Jeff Sessions said he shared President Donald Trump’s “frustrations” with the special counsel probe and called for it to wrap up.
The attorney general testified Thursday before the House Appropriations Committee, saying the investigation overseen by special counsel Robert Mueller was distracting the president from national security matters.


I have started a GoFundMe to send Michael Cohen to law school. - Andy Borowitz

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It's being reported that Veterans Administration nominee Dr. Ronny Jackson is known as "the candy man" in the White House because he gave out prescriptions "like candy." So, now we can all stop asking ourselves, "How does Melania do it?"- Conan O'Brien


Rock The Voter News




Bill Cosby Found Guilty And Screams About It
Just after being found guilty on sexual assault, comedian Bill Cosby reportedly had an outburst at his prosecutor and screamed obscenities while his potential incarceration without bail was discussed.


Now if only we could start holding our president to the same standard we’re holding Bill Cosby. - OhNoSheTwint




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Body language experts say all the touching between Presidents Trump and Macron was an exercise in primate-like male dominance. And here's the good news for Americans — apparently our baboon won.- Conan O'Brien






Business/Tech News





Former White House press secretary Sean Spicer appeared in Madame Tussauds today to unveil a wax figure of first lady Melania Trump. And you can tell it's not the real Melania because — OK, you can't tell. - Seth Myers



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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Johnny Cash in 1968, near the Arkansas farm where he grew up.

Peace.


Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Trump Hump Day

US falls to 45th on press freedom index, Trump labeled 'media-bashing enthusiast'
Reporters Without Borders has dropped the United States to No. 45 in its annual ranking of press freedom for 180 countries around the world.
In the report released Wednesday, the United States received a "fairly good" rating, which falls below the category of "good" which only 9 percent of the world was rated.



This last weekend, Nazis marched in Newnan, Georgia. 
Nazis. 
Proud. Unashamed. Out in the open. Unafraid to show their faces. 
When Nazis aren't afraid to walk down the streets of America, and black Americans are, well you'd better wake up and hear the fucking alarm.- Stonekettle






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump


According to James Comey's memos, over dinner President Trump vigorously denied that he spent a night in Moscow during the 2013 Miss Universe pageant. Which is weird because all Comey asked him was, "Can you pass the salt?”- Conan O'Brien


Stormy Daniels, James Comey Arrive At White House For State Dinner  - The Onion



U.S. Supreme Court Looks At Trump's Travel Ban Today
The U.S. Supreme Court will directly confront President Donald Trump’s travel ban for the first time with arguments being made Wednesday in a case that could redefine the president’s power to control the nation’s borders.




Senators and the American public deserve to know whether the nominee for CIA director was involved in the agency’s torture program. So far, CIA responses to our requests have been unacceptable. - Sen. Diane. Feinstein




Thank God  the Muslim/travel ban will protect us from all the white American disgruntled men carrying semi automatic weapons! - irishygirl tweet


Republican Shenanigans





Macron Offers Melania Asylum in France - Andy Borowitz





We Don't Have Nice Affordable Healthcare Because Republicans...
Kate Middleton’s “luxury” birth for her third child, a prince who is now fifth in line to the throne, was cheaper than the average delivery in the U.S.





"When the aging gorilla is confronted with the much more virile, new alpha male, he shows submissiveness by grooming the alpha male, but the gesture is actually a vain attempt by the old gorilla to humiliate his much younger rival." - Jane Goodall






I support keeping the US minimum wage at $7.25hr.
But only for the US Congress, because those guys seriously live off the tips. - John Fugelsang


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Over the weekend Trump tweeted about James Comey and Robert Mueller but he misspelled the words "counsel" and "shady." Trump doesn't know the red underline means spell check — he thinks it's his phone telling him that it loves that part of the tweet.- Jimmy Fallon


Rock The Voter News




Trump Suffering Horrible Indigestion After Eating Fresh, Well-Prepared State Dinner Meal - The Onion




Judge Says No To Ending DACA
A federal judge has ruled against the Trump administration's decision to end deportation protections for some young immigrants, saying the White House was "arbitrary and capricious" in moving to end the Obama-era DACA program.













Trump is gonna have to pay porn stars just to hold hands. - Michael Blackman



New York Times reporter writes more falsehoods about the Clintons. This time it was Chelsea. Chelsea's response:





I admire and appreciate the Clintons more and more each and every day.


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Business/Tech News

Mark Zuckerberg became a billionaire selling my data and all I got was this lousy President. - Janice




Good To Know The FTC Is Doing Its Job
LendingClub plunged as much as 17 percent on Wednesday after the Federal Trade Commission alleged that the online lender "deceived customers" on its fee structure.
LendingClub sold users on loans with "no hidden fees," but actually collected "hundreds or even thousands of dollars in hidden up-front fees from the loans," the agency said in a statement.


Oh look. The Trumps & Kardashians together. Apparently this is one of those episodes where 2 failing shows join forces to try & boost ratings. - Alt Fed Employee

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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
Oh Joy! A portable entertainment system for celebrating Christmas in the 1950s. It must use wireless electricity as there are no cords!

Peace.


Tuesday, April 24, 2018

I'm so old I remember when Republicans called the French, cheese eating surrender monkeys


Trump blasts Iran deal as 'insane' and 'ridiculous' as Macron looks on
Macron's visit was viewed as critical to swaying Trump toward a compromise, rather than the all-or-nothing approach he has signaled on the Iran deal. Trump offered scant assurances to Macron that he was reconsidering his pledge to exit the Iran agreement. But he did signal a compromise may be near


Donald Trump is a weapon of mass delusion. - Jeff Tiedrich



SPY v SPY

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Trump Furious at Overrated Royal Baby for Getting World’s Attention- Andy Borowitz


The Trump Situation Room



Iran Throws Down The Gauntlet
Iran's foreign minister warned on Tuesday that Tehran is likely to abandon the multination nuclear deal if President Trump withdraws the U.S. from the agreement.






I simply want every woman in America to have the same health care options afforded to a Republican’s mistress.- Tina Dupuy


Republican Shenanigans






The Doc Who Thought Trump Is 6'4" & 239 Lbs Is A Drunk.
President Trump on Tuesday gave his embattled pick to lead the Department of Veterans Affairs cover if he wants to withdraw his nomination.
Trump repeatedly said the choice to withdraw was Navy Rear Adm. Ronny Jackson’s, but he also questioned why he would want to go forward and take the "abuse" from politicians.









The White House doctor, Ronny Jackson, reportedly drinks too much, which makes the A+ grade he gave Trump's health finally make sense. - Andy Borowitz




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Someone Boring for President 2020. - Jesse McLaren





Rock The Voter News

"Satire is meant to ridicule power. If you are laughing at people who are hurting, it is not satire, it is bullying." - Terry Pratchett




Meanwhile, Democrats Are Trying To Save The Census
Democratic lawmakers are calling for a subpoena to force the U.S. Census Bureau and Commerce Department to release internal documents about the decision to add a controversial citizenship question to forms for the upcoming national headcount.


"Democrats have to decide whether they love this country more than they hate this president.”

No Sarah Sanders...

The only thing Democrats have to decide is what to wear at the polls in November to turn this thing blue.- Tony Posnanski




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Business/Tech News

Bezos’s offer drew a mixed response from Prime members, with some begging Amazon not to offer the pee tape to them. - Andy Borowitz






FDA: There's A War On E-Cigarettes
A U.S. government-led sting operation of retailers including 7-Eleven Inc. stores and Royal Dutch Shell Plc gas stations led to 40 warnings for selling Juul e-cigarettes to kids.









It's only a matter of time until a frightened Amazon Key customer shoots someone trying to deliver them a package, and then immediately gets hit by a driverless car—all on Mars... in virtual reality. -Keating Thomas



Yes, I have.


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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo
In 1921 eаrly suffragettes often donned a bathing suit and ate pizza in large groups to annoy men.

Peace.