All Hat No Cattle

Thursday, November 5, 2015

I believe it is time for Ben Carson to submit to a drug test.

___________________

Egypt pyramids for grain not pharoahs: presidential hopeful Carson
Egypt's pyramids were built by the biblical Joseph to store grain and were not, as archaeologists believe, tombs for pharaohs, Republican presidential hopeful Ben Carson has said.

"Ben Carson: Archaeologists Are Wrong, The Pyramids Were Built To Store Grain."

It's official: Trump is the smart one. - Ira's Dad

Ben Carson's tone when he's making up history is remarkably similar to Bill O'Reilly reading emails complimenting him at the end of his show. - LOLGOP

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

BREAKING: Vladimir Putin surrenders to CNBC after they asked him a gotcha question.- Tea Party Cat

Papa Bush Smacks Cheney, Rumsfeld
Former US president George HW Bush has hit out at Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld, two of the most senior figures in his son’s administration, labelling them too “hardline” and “arrogant” in their handling of the September 11 attacks.

It's cool that George HW Bush told his biographer that Dick Cheney was an "iron ass," but I still prefer "war criminal."- Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Are you frustrated that America isn’t more like Florida?
Jeb can fix it!- Tea Party Cat

Pitch meeting:
"How about 'Jeb Can Fix It'?"
Jeb: "Who cares? I hate my brother. I hate my father. I hate my life."
"So it's a go, then."
- Jeff Tiedrich

Mr. Idaho Potato Heads
An Idaho militia group protested the arrival of Syrian refugees by issuing dark warnings based on anti-Muslim conspiracy theories.
The III% Idaho group rallied Monday outside the statehouse in Boise, where about 100 anti-government activists, many wearing flak jackets and other armor, waved American flags and banners promoting their pro-gun militia group

FOX News just asked Ben Carson if he was worried about The Dow and he replied that he's not even Buddhist.- John Fugelsang

No More Mr. Nice Guy
Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) is changing his tone regarding Democratic presidential rival Hillary Clinton's use of a private email server while secretary of State.
Questions about whether Clinton's email practices compromised classified information or impacted public record requests are "valid," ...

Rock The Voter News

Cheney's Marble Head To Be On Display At The Capitol
Starting in December, the likeness of former Vice President Dick Cheney will grace the U.S. Capitol, in accordance with a Senate tradition honoring former vice presidents.

John Boehner Gets Teardrop Tattoo To Commemorate His Time In Congress - LOLGOP

Business/Tech News

We have Bill O'Reilly here tonight. He's the author of the new book "Killing Reagan," as well as "Killing Lincoln," "Killing Kennedy," and "Killing Jesus." So Bill’s gonna sit in that chair, and I'm gonna sit waaayyy over there.- Jimmy Fallon

The House Of Trump Cards Is Falling Down

Donald Trump is demanding as much as $75 million from hundreds of condo owners in Panama City's Trump Ocean Club, alleging that its directors wrongfully fired his company as administrator managing the luxury building that is the tallest in Central America.

_________________

____________

Odd News

Time To Deflate Photo

Gudvangen, Norway looks like a great place to sit by the fire and read a good book OR get the telescope out!

Peace.

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Today in History

___________________

Rebooting Jeb Bush apologizes to France for mocking them
Jeb Bush’s rebooted campaign for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination included an apology to the French on Tuesday for making a joke about their work ethic.

NOTICE: Short edition today.

If Jeb Bush were a stock, he'd be the entire stock market his brother left us in 2009.- LOLGOP

Man bombed Wal-Mart because it stopped selling Confederate flags, finally convincing everyone that the flag isn't so bad after all.- Adam Wolf

Jughead, Err, Jeb Is Dropping Like A Rock
Donald Trump and Ben Carson have healthy leads over the rest of the Republican presidential field, while Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) is on the rise and former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush is fading at 4%, according to a new national survey.

If Republicans move any further to right on immigration, they will technically have been deported.- LOLGOP

They Can't Impeach Obama, So Now They're Going After His Presidential Wallet
GOP presidential candidate and former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee suggested that one way Congress could stop the Obama administration from extending visas to immigrants is to cut off funding to the White House.

Marco Rubio trails a reality show star and a grifter on a 2-week book tour by over 10pts in his home state; or as media puts it, 'surging.'- John Fugelsang

Oil Lobbyists Are Very Busy Right Now
Bernie Sanders announced on Wednesday afternoon his support for a new climate bill that would ban all new fossil fuel development on US federal lands and terminate current leases that aren't producing. The bill, called the "Keep It In The Ground Act," would also ban offshore drilling for oil and gas in the Arctic and the Atlantic and would stop new leases for offshore drilling in the Pacific and the Gulf of Mexico.

The GOP candidates have banded together to collectively bargain for better conditions at debates -but don't you try that at your job, k? - John Fugelsang

Every Thanksgiving we all go home to our families and face our own personal Benghazi Committees.- Warren Holstein

___________

So sorry for the shortened edition but the darn Internet connection was haywire today. Sigh.

__________

Time To Deflate Photo

A Mongolian Ibex out for a stroll.

Peace.

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Republican Infighting Continues :)

___________________

Megyn Kelly Ridicules GOP Debate Letter: Want A Foot Massage Too?
Fox News host Megyn Kelly on Monday night mocked the letter drafted by Republican presidential campaigns listing a series of rules and questions for networks hosting future debates.

The Republican candidates don't want debates; they want free campaign infomercials in prime time.- Tina Dupuy

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

UK Split On Syrian Airstrikes
The British government insisted Tuesday that it is still considering airstrikes against Islamic State group targets in Syria, even though an influential group of lawmakers said the military action would be "incoherent" and ineffective without a plan to end the country's civil war.

Weird. There are actual people who thought, "Working for a Bush brother will turn out well."- LOLGOP

House Speaker Paul Ryan said that if Americans want more paid leave "they should do what I did and run for Congress." - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

A new poll shows that Republican voters trust Trump on the economy and nuclear weapons, presumably based on his history of bankruptcies and shouting at people.- Andy Borowitz

Ryan Puts Hastert Back In The Closet
One of Paul Ryan's first acts since being elected Speaker last week: removing the portrait of disgraced former Speaker Dennis Hastert that hung for years in the ornate hallway just off the House floor.

Paul Ryan says not to expect #immigrationreform while he's Speaker as that would require someone willing to work more than 3 days a week. - The Daily Edge

Ben Carson Thinks Americans Are As Stupid As He Is!
When retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson, the current GOP 2016 front-runner, campaigns, he routinely pitches "common sense solutions from We the People." But it seems the candidate who celebrates a cheerful and straightforward populism has a fair bit of disdain for many of his fellow citizens, for at a videotaped event last year, while discussing the American people, he declared, "Many of them are stupid."

Trump bankrupting the GOP would almost be too perfect of an ending.- LOLGOP

Rock The Voter News

Obama Wants to Debate All 15 GOP Candidates and Their Moms. - LOLGOP

Millennial Women Like Sanders, Not Hillary
Laura Shadle likes Hillary Clinton. But the 23-year-old Penn State senior is more inspired by Bernie Sanders.
Shadle, who is volunteering for the Sanders campaign in Pennsylvania, says it’s more “progressive” to go with the candidate that speaks to her, not the candidate who could make history by becoming the nation’s first woman president.

Carly Fiorina said that after the previous debate, people told her that she needed to smile more. They were like, "Just pretend you're laying off a bunch of people."- Jimmy Fallon

Business/Tech News

The top 25 hedge fund managers make more than all kindergarten teachers in the US—combined. We need to fix that.- Hillary Clinton

Milwaukee, A Sex Hub? Milwaukee?
Milwaukee has become “the Harvard of pimp school” and Wisconsin is a hub of human trafficking, an expert has said in the wake of an FBI sting last month in which nine adolescents were rescued from commercial sexual exploitation, meaning Milwaukee tied with Las Vegas for the third highest number of young people rescued during the FBI raids across the country.

There are reports that a movie is in the works based on the game Monopoly. They say the movie will be just like the game because it's four hours long and it ends with your family fighting.- Jimmy Fallon