All Hat No Cattle: I believe it is time for Ben Carson to submit to a drug test.

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Egypt pyramids for grain not pharoahs: presidential hopeful Carson
Egypt's pyramids were built by the biblical Joseph to store grain and were not, as archaeologists believe, tombs for pharaohs, Republican presidential hopeful Ben Carson has said.

"Ben Carson: Archaeologists Are Wrong, The Pyramids Were Built To Store Grain."

It's official: Trump is the smart one. - Ira's Dad

Ben Carson's tone when he's making up history is remarkably similar to Bill O'Reilly reading emails complimenting him at the end of his show. - LOLGOP

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

BREAKING: Vladimir Putin surrenders to CNBC after they asked him a gotcha question.- Tea Party Cat

Papa Bush Smacks Cheney, Rumsfeld
Former US president George HW Bush has hit out at Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld, two of the most senior figures in his son’s administration, labelling them too “hardline” and “arrogant” in their handling of the September 11 attacks.

It's cool that George HW Bush told his biographer that Dick Cheney was an "iron ass," but I still prefer "war criminal."- Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Are you frustrated that America isn’t more like Florida?
Jeb can fix it!- Tea Party Cat

Pitch meeting:
"How about 'Jeb Can Fix It'?"
Jeb: "Who cares? I hate my brother. I hate my father. I hate my life."
"So it's a go, then."
- Jeff Tiedrich

Mr. Idaho Potato Heads
An Idaho militia group protested the arrival of Syrian refugees by issuing dark warnings based on anti-Muslim conspiracy theories.
The III% Idaho group rallied Monday outside the statehouse in Boise, where about 100 anti-government activists, many wearing flak jackets and other armor, waved American flags and banners promoting their pro-gun militia group

FOX News just asked Ben Carson if he was worried about The Dow and he replied that he's not even Buddhist.- John Fugelsang

No More Mr. Nice Guy
Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) is changing his tone regarding Democratic presidential rival Hillary Clinton's use of a private email server while secretary of State.
Questions about whether Clinton's email practices compromised classified information or impacted public record requests are "valid," ...

Rock The Voter News

Cheney's Marble Head To Be On Display At The Capitol
Starting in December, the likeness of former Vice President Dick Cheney will grace the U.S. Capitol, in accordance with a Senate tradition honoring former vice presidents.

John Boehner Gets Teardrop Tattoo To Commemorate His Time In Congress - LOLGOP

Business/Tech News

We have Bill O'Reilly here tonight. He's the author of the new book "Killing Reagan," as well as "Killing Lincoln," "Killing Kennedy," and "Killing Jesus." So Bill’s gonna sit in that chair, and I'm gonna sit waaayyy over there.- Jimmy Fallon