Monday, March 9, 2020

Trump cheers lower gas prices amid stock market plunge, downplays coronavirus fears

Trump cheers lower gas prices amid stock market plunge, downplays coronavirus fears 
When it comes to the novel coronavirus, President Trump is ever the optimist.
As the virus spreads throughout the U.S. and across the globe, stoking fears about physical and economic health (amplified by Monday's stock market plunge), Trump has maintained a mostly rosy outlook. He continued that Monday first by highlighting tumbling gas prices — spurred by Saudi Arabia's decision to slash oil exports by 10 percent over the weekend and crude oil falling more than 20 percent — which he said were "good for the consumer."

Cruise Ship Passengers Demand To Be Housed At Mar-a-Lago. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Ever notice how everyone who calls Jane Fonda "Hanoi Jane" never want to bash the civilian politicians who sent 58,000 Americans to die in that war - just a young actress' naive protest of it. - John Fugelsang

Bill Gates To Provide Coronavirus Home-Testing Kits To Seattle
Testing for the novel coronavirus in the Seattle area will get a huge boost in the coming weeks as a project funded by Bill Gates and his foundation begins offering home-testing kits that will allow people who fear they may be infected to swab their noses and send the samples back for analysis.
Results, which should be available in one to two days, will be shared with local health officials who will notify those who test positive. 

Coronavirus got Boomers stocking their doomsday bunkers... meanwhile millennials are online shopping for bathing suits for the five island trip they just booked on Spirit for $130. - Kevin Harden, Jr.

Guess what. Turns out we DO need government. - Dan Rather

Republican Shenanigans

Trump wants to leave sick people on that docked cruise ship so America’s coronavirus numbers don’t go up. After hearing this I had to wash my brain for 20 seconds with hot soapy water while singing “Happy Birthday” twice. - Bette Midler

Erik Prince, Bush Mercenary Holdover, Is Spying On Americans. Democrats To Be Specific.
Erik Prince, the security contractor with close ties to the Trump administration, has in recent years helped recruit former American and British spies for secretive intelligence-gathering operations that included infiltrating Democratic congressional campaigns, labor organizations and other groups considered hostile to the Trump agenda, according to interviews and documents.

I am getting a little annoyed at people responding to my tweets saying 'why do you even believe the Chinese numbers' and 'China was hiding this' etc. There is something we all need to keep in mind: China bought us time and we wasted it. - Florian Krammer

Melania Mad. She Work Hard On Tennis Court Remodeling!
Melania Trump pushed back Saturday after photos she tweeted of herself overseeing a White House construction project generated an online backlash...On Thursday, the first lady tweeted a series of pics, including two of herself wearing a hard hat while reviewing blueprints for the construction of a tennis pavilion on the south grounds.

Melania's not just another racist birther - she's the Carmela Soprano of First Ladies.  - John Fugelsang


 Click here to meet C.W.


Obama Kind Of Hurt No One’s Even Asked For His Endorsement. - The Onion

Rock The Voter News

It's like the stock market has finally realized Donald Trump is president. - Middle Age Riot

Trump Thinks Journalists Want To Infect Him With Coronavirus
“Stories about Trump’s coronavirus fears have spread through the White House. Last week Trump told aides he’s afraid journalists will try to purposefully contract coronavirus to give it to him on Air Force One,” Sherman writes. “… The source also said Trump has asked the Secret Service to set up a screening program and bar anyone who has a cough from the White House grounds. ‘He’s definitely melting down over this,’ the source said.”

People hate pigeons because 'they're dirty and spread disease.' 

As opposed to, say, people. - John Fugelsang


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New Health Insurance Law Lets Employers Refuse To Cover Contraceptives If They’re Morally Opposed To Women. - The Onion

Business/Tech News


DOJ Threatens Coronavirus' Price Riggers
The Department of Justice (DOJ) warned on Monday it will hold businesses accountable if they violate antitrust laws during the coronavirus outbreak. 
DOJ cautioned against companies or individuals fixing prices or rigging bids for any equipment that customers might use against the virus, such as gloves, face masks, and respirators.

There is absolutely no symbolism more perfect than International Women's Day being 23 hours long. - Elaine Filadelfo


I'd Rather You Laugh Than Cry

Thank you!


Odd News

Time To Deflate Photo

Grand Teton National Park in Wyoming. Suddenly, I have the urge to rent a canoe.


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