All Hat No Cattle: Islamic State militants vow to ‘de-throne’ Vladimir Putin and ‘liberate’ Chechnya

Islamic State militants vow to ‘de-throne’ Vladimir Putin and ‘liberate’ Chechnya
Islamic State militants have issued a threat to President Vladimir Putin, vowing to oust him and “liberate” the volatile North Caucasus over his support of the Syrian regime.

ISIS is now threatening Putin. ISIS vs KGB? I place my bet on Putin. He'll spike their leader's water with nuclear material. Yeah, that or something similar. ISIS is cock-a-doodle-doodling OR Putin put them up to it. lol

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

President Obama will attend a NATO summit in Wales this week with 67 other world leaders. He’s trying to project strength, so the White House says he'll be wearing his toughest shade of tan suit.- Jimmy Fallon

ISIS CRISIS In Iraq Continues
Islamic State militants kidnapped 40 men from a town in Iraq's northern province of Kirkuk on Thursday, dragging the men into cars before driving off, residents said.

Vladimir Putin said today he hopes to have a Ukrainian peace deal by Friday. He's reached out the olive branch. And if there's no peace deal by Friday, Putin said, "I will crush Ukraine like bug under boot."- Craig Ferguson

70ish% of young Americans think same-sex marriage is as controversial as women wearing pants. Stick with this issue for a few decades, GOP.- LOLGOP

Republican Shenanigans

Scaring The Bejesus Out Of Kids
The publisher of a series of anti-terrorism coloring books for children is rereleasing them in the wake of the brutal execution of American journalists by Islamic militants.

An idea. Give ISIS Cheney. Bush, and all the others who caused the Iraq war in exchange for the hostages they hold. ISIS gets what they want, we get what we want and the Bush Cheney crime gang gets what they deserve. - TwoStones Tweet

WHY WON'T OBAMA FOLLOW DUCK DYNASTY'S FOOLPROOF PLAN TO BAPTIZE OR KILL EVERYONE IN ISIS??? - Top Conservative Cat

Lobbyist Patriotism
When you're a Russian company trying to manage U.S. sanctions it helps to have friends in the right places. That's probably why Gazprombank, a Russian bank hit by sanctions earlier this year, named former U.S. senators Trent Lott and John Breaux as its lobbyists.

Rock The Voter News

Another Loss To Comedy
Joan Rivers, the razor-witted comic and red carpet queen, died Thursday of complications suffered from minor surgery in New York City a week ago. She was 81.

Yes, We Have No Bananas
A severe drought has ravaged crops in Central America and as many as 2.81 million people are struggling to feed themselves, the United Nations World Food Programme (WFP) said on Friday, though the region’s coffee crop has been largely unscathed.

The drug store CVS announced that the corporation is changing itself to CVS Health, and they're no longer selling cigarettes. The CEO estimates the company will lose about $2 billion this year because they're not selling cigarettes. It is part of their customer health focus. But you'll still be able to buy tons of candy in the candy aisle.- Jimmy Kimmel

Business/Tech News

The guys who think fast workers don't deserve a living wage are just fine with the Wall Street guys who crashed our economy earning millions. - LOLGOP

GOP Stuffs Media Coffers While Slutting A Candidate
Rep. Ann Kirkpatrick (D-Ariz.) doesn't have a head in the latest attack ad against her -- just a pair of legs, some high heels, and a lot of "baggage."

A glitch in the John Madden NFL game has accidentally created a player who is 1 foot tall. Another glitch accidentally created an NFL player with no criminal record.- Conan O'Brien