All Hat No Cattle

Friday, March 4, 2022

NATO rejects Ukraine no-fly zone, says 'not part of this' war

NATO rejects Ukraine no-fly zone, says 'not part of this' war

NATO allies rejected Ukraine's demand for no-fly zones on Friday, saying they were increasing support but that stepping in directly would lead to a broader, even more brutal European war so far limited to Russia's assault on its neighbour.

The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything. ― Albert Einstein

The World Is A Safer Place Without Republicans

Sober Lindsey is waking up to learn that drunk Lindsey called for the assassination of someone known for poisoning people abroad who have crossed him. - Ron Filipkowski

Crematoriums R Us
Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy said Thursday that Russian troops are lugging mobile cremation chambers with them as they continue their assault across the country, allegedly to dispose of their own dead and obscure the true number of casualties they’ve incurred.

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Putin - the only man who could make Chernobyl more toxic. - John Fugelsang

We elected a clown and got a circus.
The Ukrainian people elected a “clown”
and got Winston Churchill. - Tim

The Jewish Space Laser is stored at the Yentagon. - OhNoSheTwitnt

Republican Shenanigans

Look: just throw us a bone and indict the fu*k out of someone already. it's been a sh*tty week and we could all use some cheering up. - Jeff Tiedrich

Oh, NOW Bill Barr Speaks Up. Greedy Coward.
Former Attorney General William Barr said in an interview aired on Friday that he believes former President Trump is responsible for thee Capitol riot "in the broad sense of that word."

Mike Pence - "a blank space between parenthesis". - Jimmy Kimmel

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Rock The Voter News

Biden's Poll Numbers Jump
President Joe Biden’s approval surged 8 points in one poll following his State of the Union address, and other data seems to indicate the potential for a wider polling bounce.

“In a time of universal deceit — telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”— George Orwell

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Business/Tech News

Current mood: Rand Paul’s neighbor. - John Collins

Kentucky Is Full of Kommies!
A Russian company that has invested in Braidy Industries' planned aluminum rolling mill in Eastern Kentucky was identified as a proxy of the Kremlin in a new report the Senate Intelligence Committee released this week.

"First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out -
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out -
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out -

Then they came for me - and there was no one left to speak for me."

~ Martin Niemöller, 1946

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Thursday, March 3, 2022

Kremlin Warns Putin Won’t Back Down From Ukraine Invasion Until ‘the End’

Kremlin Warns Putin Won’t Back Down From Ukraine Invasion Until ‘the End’

Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov sent a chill around the globe Wednesday when he said World War III would be “nuclear.” Now, he’s issued another threatening message to the world, saying that President Vladimir Putin won’t back down from his invasion of Ukraine until “the end.”

Is it just me, or does Putin have a penchant for nukes?

Record TV Ratings Expected For Putin’s War Crimes Trial at The Hague. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Republicans

Putin Clarifies That His Ban on Journalists Does Not Include Tucker Carlson. - Andy Borowitz

Biden Wants 10 Billion Sent To Ukraine
The White House on Wednesday formally asked Congress to authorize $10 billion in additional humanitarian, economic and security assistance for Ukraine and allies in central Europe to respond to Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.

America is starting to get back to normal, which is great, but something keeps gnawing at me, something in the back of my mind that I can’t quite oh yeah now I remember it’s that REPUBLICANS TRIED TO OVERTHROW THE F*CKING GOVERNMENT. - Middle Age Riot

Republican Shenanigans

When Marjorie Taylor Greene heckled Biden I came this close to using my space laser. - Andy Borowitz

Just Arrest Him, Already!

The House panel investigating the Jan. 6 insurrection at the U.S. Capitol said Wednesday for the first time that its evidence suggests crimes may have been committed by former President Donald Trump and his associates in the failed effort to overturn the outcome of the 2020 presidential election.

Putin: "I moved on Trump like a bitch. When you're a tyrannical dictator, he'll let you do it. He'll let you do anything." - Middle Age Riot

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Rock The Voter News

Ukrainian Decides To Dance Instead of Fight
Maks Chmerkovskiy is back on U.S. soil after a harrowing week spent trying to get out of Ukraine. The Dancing with the Stars alum, who was in Kyiv to film the Ukrainian version of World of Dance, kept his social media followers updated with tense videos as air-raid sirens blared in the city and he worked to flee the country by train.

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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Business/Tech News

I am 100% behind the idea of creating a show called Yacht Seize. - Danny Deraney

Russia Playing Russian Roulette?

Roscosmos will not launch three dozen OneWeb internet satellites as planned on Friday (March 4) unless the company meets new demands, the Russian space agency announced today (March 2).

Zelensky proves that not all TV stars are sh*tty leaders. - John Collins

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Wednesday, March 2, 2022

Boebert and Greene Turn Their Backs on Biden’s Cabinet and Heckle Him During SOTU Speech

Boebert and Greene Turn Their Backs on Biden’s Cabinet and Heckle Him During SOTU Speech

Reps. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) and Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) turned their backs on President Joe Biden’s cabinet as they entered the House chamber before the State of the Union, and both shouted at Biden during his address.

Americans Stunned By Jarring Spectacle of President Praising NATO. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Republicans

If we’re seizing all Russian assets, does that mean Mar-a-lago belongs to us now? - Woman in the Moon tweet

Zelensky Asks The World For More Help

Ukraine has received weapons shipments from NATO members to help withstand a full-scale military invasion unleashed by Russian forces last week, while the West has also introduced widespread sanctions on the Russian economy. But Zelenskiy has urged the international community to do more,

"A state that commits war crimes against civilians shouldn't be a member of the UN Security Council." - Volodymyr Zelenskyy

Republican Shenanigans

For the Republican Party, a new low is just a temporary state until they reach the next new low. - Middle Age Riot

Zelensky Assassination Attempt Foiled By -- Guess Who? -- Russians!
Ukrainian National Security and Defense Council chief Oleksiy Danilov announced during a briefing Tuesday that Ukrainian forces had foiled an assassination plot against President Volodymyr Zelensky, according to a Telegram post from Ukrainian authorities...Ukrainian authorities had been tipped off about the plot by members of Russia's Federal Security Service who do not support the war, he added.

Here's an idea. Get Tish James to shut down Trump Org and relocate Ukrainian refugees to Trump properties.

Who's on board? - Tea Pain tweet

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Rock The Voter News

Stephen Colbert sums up the tone of President Biden's SOTU - "It was a roller coaster ride of riproaring reasonableness."

Isn't that a nice change? - Janice Hough

When someone shows you who they are believe them

Sen. Joe Manchin (D-WV) notably sat with Republicans during President Joe Biden’s State of the Union address on Tuesday night.

The West Virginia senator has been a thorn in the side of Biden and progressives for staking out moderate and even conservative positions that have hampered some of the president’s aims. Most notably, Manchin appears to have single-handedly killed Biden’s signature Build Back Better agenda

Marco Rubio was not at the State of the Union.

He will not be at the next one either because Val Demings will be taking his place. - Jake Cocchiarella

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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Business/Tech News

If any normal American acted in their workplace the way Marjorie Taylor Greene acted last night, they would be fired from their job. - Marcus Flowers who is running to unseat Marjorie Taylor Greene

Ukraine Asks the Mothers of Russian POWs To Pick Them Up At the Border

Ukraine's defense ministry is asking mothers of captured Russian troops to come pick up their sons.

"Mama! Your [prisoner of war] son is waiting for you!" the defense ministry wrote on a flyer posted to Facebook on Wednesday. "Ukraine has made the decision to return POW to their mothers if they come to Ukraine."

Ash Wednesday - the one day the Pope wants you to get dirty. - John Fugelsang

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