All Hat No Cattle

Wednesday, March 11, 2020

Guess what, folks? Trump is classifying coronavirus meetings. We are so f--ked.

White House told federal health agency to classify coronavirus deliberations
The White House has ordered federal health officials to treat top-level coronavirus meetings as classified, an unusual step that has restricted information and hampered the U.S. government’s response to the contagion, according to four Trump administration officials.

Don't be surprised if Dr. Fauci is transferred, muted, fired or mysteriously disappears.He is speaking truth & Trump has to be pissed. - Woman in the Moon tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Maybe Trump will take the Coronavirus more seriously if we change its name to Hillary’s Ebolamails. - OhNoSheTwint

The White House Is Hiding Something
Top Trump administration officials on Wednesday cut short their testimony at a House Oversight and Reform Committee hearing on the response to the coronavirus, with the White House saying they were needed at a meeting focused on the spreading virus.

Republican Shenanigans

BERNIE RALLIES: cancelled

BIDEN RALLIES: cancelled

TRUMP RALLIES: “We love shaking hands then touching our faces don’t we folks? The media hates it but we love it.” - Chris Jackson

Coronavirus is 10x More Lethal Than The Common Flu.
A top U.S. health official said the worst is yet to come with the coronavirus outbreak that has already infected more than 1,000 people across the nation and resulted in at least 31 deaths....Fauci said COVID-19 is at least 10 times “more lethal” than the seasonal flu, even if the mortality rate drops far below the World Health Organization’s current estimate of 3.4%.

Who knew we'd see the stock market and the Sanders campaigns crash out in the same week? - Rick Wilson

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Rock The Voter News

I would rather vote for a Democrat who will disappoint me than a Republican who will meet my expectations. - Middle Age Riot

No, No, No, Norway. NO!
Due to the ongoing threat posed by the COVID-19 coronavirus, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has warned Americans to avoid cruise ships, as the extended time in close quarters leaves passengers particularly vulnerable to contagions.
Norwegian Cruise Line (NCL) customers who called the company over concerns about the now-global pandemic, however, were given false information about the virus in an effort to convince them that it was safe to travel on their ships, the Miami New Times reported Wednesday.

There's no doubt...the Christian right has gone to bed with the more conservative elements of the Republican Party. And there's been a melding in their goals when it comes to the separation of church & state. I've always believed in the separation of church & state. ~Jimmy Carter

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Keep calm by remembering that the U.S. pharmaceutical industry is working around the clock to find the most profitable vaccine. - The Onion

Business/Tech News

Trump says he’s going to propose a payroll tax cut to help hourly workers deal with coronavirus. So, they’ll pay a smaller % of taxes on the $0 they’ll earn when they’re out sick? Trump has zero idea how real jobs work because he’s never done one. - Bette Midler

The Yo-Yo Stock Market Enters Bear Territory
The S&P 500, Dow and Nasdaq tumbled Wednesday as the volatility of the past couple weeks extended further.
The Dow shed 1,464.94 points during the session, or 5.9%, sending it more than 20% below its recent high from February and into a bear market.

I just cancelled the St. Patrick’s Day Parade and he is PISSED. - TweetOfGod

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I'd Rather You Laugh Than Cry

Tuesday, March 10, 2020

Trump greets crowd in Fla. despite CDC warning

Trump greets crowd in Fla. despite CDC warning
The message was simple, even if it might prove difficult to follow: “Avoid crowds,” Nancy Messonnier, MD, of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention told reporters on Monday morning.

Italy has banned weddings and funerals for 16 million people. Japan has closed schools for a month. France and Iraq have banned public gatherings. The U.N. has canceled all physical meetings to address climate change. Americans are uncertain what to do about Coachella. - James Hamblin

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

You’re not just protecting yourself by working from home, minimizing travel, and washing your hands.

You’re protecting people in your community who may have a greater risk of complications from COVID-19 than you do.

We’re all in this together. Let’s act like it. - Hillary Clinton

The Willful Neglect of Protecting The American People
On Saturday Jan. 11 — a month and a half before the first Covid-19 case not linked to travel was diagnosed in the United States — Chinese scientists posted the genome of the mysterious new virus, and within a week virologists in Berlin had produced the first diagnostic test for the disease.
Soon after, researchers in other nations rolled out their own tests, too, sometimes with different genetic targets. By the end of February, the World Health Organization had shipped tests to nearly 60 countries.
The United States was not among them.

I’m for paid sick leave for every American for every sickness.
Not sure why some folks would come to the conclusion that’s it’s a good idea for Coronavirus but not for cancer. - Sen. Chris Murphy

Republican Shenanigans

Quit dying, people! You’re embarrassing the President! - TheTweetOfGod

House Democrats Granted Access To Unredacted Mueller Report
House Democrats scored a major legal victory Tuesday as a federal appeals court panel granted them permission to access grand jury secrets from Robert Mueller’s Russia probe.
The 2-1 ruling from the D.C. Circuit Court of Appeals upheld a lower court decision in favor of the House’s ability to see the deleted passages in the public version of the Mueller report, the 448-page tome that describes the two-year investigation into potential links between Trump’s campaign and Russia.

ATTENTION CORONAVIRUS VICTIMS: You can rest easier knowin’ your illness didn’t keep Donald Trump from playin’ golf.. - Tea Pain

If men could get pregnant, the Second Amendment would be expanded to protect abortion and birth control. - MIddle Age Riot

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Rock The Voter News

Joe Biden just told a pro-gun propagandist that he’s “full of sh-t.”
I love Joe Biden. - Palmer Report

Gov. Cuomo Sends National Guard To New Rochelle
Gov. Andrew M. Cuomo said Tuesday the state will send the National Guard to New Rochelle as part of a "containment" plan to slow the spread of coronavirus in that Westchester city, which has become the center of the state's outbreak.
The number of confirmed cases of coronavirus in New York has increased to 173, Cuomo said. More than 100 people have tested positive for COVID-19 in Westchester County.

Remember when the Dow crashed and Obama said “I got this,” then H1N1 hit and ppl panicked but Obama said “didn’t I just say it got this?” then Ebola hit & O said “I told y’all motherf--kers I got this,” then stocks soared & everyone got free health care?

Anyway (sigh)Good times- Michael Harriot

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Republican are talking about bailing out the airlines and oil companies. How about a bail-out for middle-class and poor folks who can’t pay their medical bills? - Stephen King

Business/Tech News

Rep. Louis Gohmert has chosen not to self-quarantine because he's already used to infecting everyone around him with his stupidity. - Nick Jack Pappas

This Man Deserves The What-Would-Jesus-Do Award
Just like any other used-car dealership, during the day, Kiplin Automotive Group sells cars. But as night falls and others return home, Kiplin Auto's manager James Charles turns on the lights and transforms the dealership into a haven for those who are homeless and living in their cars.

The real winner of this pandemic are the nation's dogs, who are experiencing unprecedented levels of People Being Home. - Hanna Brooks Olsen

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I'd Rather You Laugh Than Cry

Monday, March 9, 2020

Trump cheers lower gas prices amid stock market plunge, downplays coronavirus fears

Trump cheers lower gas prices amid stock market plunge, downplays coronavirus fears
When it comes to the novel coronavirus, President Trump is ever the optimist.
As the virus spreads throughout the U.S. and across the globe, stoking fears about physical and economic health (amplified by Monday's stock market plunge), Trump has maintained a mostly rosy outlook. He continued that Monday first by highlighting tumbling gas prices — spurred by Saudi Arabia's decision to slash oil exports by 10 percent over the weekend and crude oil falling more than 20 percent — which he said were "good for the consumer."

Cruise Ship Passengers Demand To Be Housed At Mar-a-Lago. - Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Ever notice how everyone who calls Jane Fonda "Hanoi Jane" never want to bash the civilian politicians who sent 58,000 Americans to die in that war - just a young actress' naive protest of it. - John Fugelsang

Bill Gates To Provide Coronavirus Home-Testing Kits To Seattle
Testing for the novel coronavirus in the Seattle area will get a huge boost in the coming weeks as a project funded by Bill Gates and his foundation begins offering home-testing kits that will allow people who fear they may be infected to swab their noses and send the samples back for analysis.
Results, which should be available in one to two days, will be shared with local health officials who will notify those who test positive.

Coronavirus got Boomers stocking their doomsday bunkers... meanwhile millennials are online shopping for bathing suits for the five island trip they just booked on Spirit for $130. - Kevin Harden, Jr.

Guess what. Turns out we DO need government. - Dan Rather

Republican Shenanigans

Trump wants to leave sick people on that docked cruise ship so America’s coronavirus numbers don’t go up. After hearing this I had to wash my brain for 20 seconds with hot soapy water while singing “Happy Birthday” twice. - Bette Midler

Erik Prince, Bush Mercenary Holdover, Is Spying On Americans. Democrats To Be Specific.
Erik Prince, the security contractor with close ties to the Trump administration, has in recent years helped recruit former American and British spies for secretive intelligence-gathering operations that included infiltrating Democratic congressional campaigns, labor organizations and other groups considered hostile to the Trump agenda, according to interviews and documents.

I am getting a little annoyed at people responding to my tweets saying 'why do you even believe the Chinese numbers' and 'China was hiding this' etc. There is something we all need to keep in mind: China bought us time and we wasted it. - Florian Krammer

Melania Mad. She Work Hard On Tennis Court Remodeling!
Melania Trump pushed back Saturday after photos she tweeted of herself overseeing a White House construction project generated an online backlash...On Thursday, the first lady tweeted a series of pics, including two of herself wearing a hard hat while reviewing blueprints for the construction of a tennis pavilion on the south grounds.

Melania's not just another racist birther - she's the Carmela Soprano of First Ladies. - John Fugelsang

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Obama Kind Of Hurt No One’s Even Asked For His Endorsement. - The Onion

Rock The Voter News

It's like the stock market has finally realized Donald Trump is president. - Middle Age Riot

Trump Thinks Journalists Want To Infect Him With Coronavirus
“Stories about Trump’s coronavirus fears have spread through the White House. Last week Trump told aides he’s afraid journalists will try to purposefully contract coronavirus to give it to him on Air Force One,” Sherman writes. “… The source also said Trump has asked the Secret Service to set up a screening program and bar anyone who has a cough from the White House grounds. ‘He’s definitely melting down over this,’ the source said.”

People hate pigeons because 'they're dirty and spread disease.'

As opposed to, say, people. - John Fugelsang

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New Health Insurance Law Lets Employers Refuse To Cover Contraceptives If They’re Morally Opposed To Women. - The Onion

Business/Tech News

LET'S SEE YOU BRAG ABOUT THE STOCK MARKET NOW, YOU INCOMPETENT F--K. - Jeff Tiedrich

DOJ Threatens Coronavirus' Price Riggers
The Department of Justice (DOJ) warned on Monday it will hold businesses accountable if they violate antitrust laws during the coronavirus outbreak.
DOJ cautioned against companies or individuals fixing prices or rigging bids for any equipment that customers might use against the virus, such as gloves, face masks, and respirators.

There is absolutely no symbolism more perfect than International Women's Day being 23 hours long. - Elaine Filadelfo

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I'd Rather You Laugh Than Cry