Monday, May 4, 2020

See historian's reaction when Trump compares himself to Lincoln

See historian's reaction when Trump compares himself to Lincoln
President Trump said he believes the media treats him worse than President Abraham Lincoln at a Fox News town hall.


One rule of American politics: don't compare yourself to Abraham Lincoln. - Dan Rather



The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Pubs in Ireland are closed until at least August 10. 

Pubs. In Ireland. 

But by all means let’s open Cracker Barrel right now. - Marc Murphy





Pompeo Says China Created Covid-19
Secretary of State Mike Pompeo said on Sunday that there is “enormous evidence” to indicate Covid-19 originated in China’s Wuhan Institute of Virology.
“We have said from the beginning that this was a virus that originated in Wuhan, China,” Pompeo said in the interview on ABC’s This Week. 






Republican Shenanigans

Trump just said the Spanish Flu ended World War I in 1917. I've said it before: if brains were black powder, Donald Trump couldn't blow his nose. - Stephen King





Lawyer: Michael Cohen release delayed without explanation.
Cohen had been told he was to be released from a federal prison camp to home confinement on Friday, but that did not occur. A source says release is expected to go forward later this month.






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My first thought after seeing some recent footage of UFOs in our airspace was, “Guys, could you come back at a better time?” - Conan O'Brien


Rock The Voter News




I’d just like to point out the lack of guns at the women’s march because we aren’t a bunch of scared little bitches.- AshleyFrankly tweet

China versus Trump
An internal Chinese report warns that Beijing faces a rising wave of hostility in the wake of the coronavirus outbreak that could tip relations with the United States into confrontation, people familiar with the paper told Reuters.




New Claim That Enemies of  U.S. Developed Trump in Lab. - Andy Borowitz


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Just zoomed w two Canadian friends who own a hard-hit small business. They applied online for the Cdn emergency small business loan program. Application process took under 10 minutes; approval less than 2 minutes. Money arrived in their account two days later. - David Frum


Business/Tech News




Being required to wear a face mask into Walmart so you can buy a six-pack of Mountain Dew is not oppression. - Mohamad Safa


God Ran Out Of Locusts, I Guess
As if 2020 wasn't already bad enough, the US now has another problem to deal with: a terrifying monster insect nicknamed the "murder hornet."
Officially called the Asian giant hornet, or Vespa mandarinia, the huge insects have been spotted in the US for the first time in recent months, appearing in Washington state, the state's Department of Agriculture says.





Blue Angels Draw Huge Crowds In Country Where Huge Crowds Are Dumbest Idea Ever. - Andy Borowitz


Summer is coming



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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
Two baby seals because we deserve some cuteness in our lives.

Peace.


Friday, May 1, 2020

Fauci Tells All States It’s Time to Issue Extremely Strict Stay-at-Home Orders

Fauci Tells All States It’s Time to Issue Extremely Strict Stay-at-Home Orders
Anthony Fauci has told all states it’s time to stop allowing any exemptions to social-distancing guidelines, and warned that forcing people to stay home across the nation is the “only thing we have” in the federal government’s arsenal to fight back against the coronavirus pandemic.


Trump Hopes To Speed Up Development of Vaccine By Letting Researchers Test Anything They Want On Eric Trump. - Andy Borowitz





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Putin Angrily Resigns from Trump’s ReĆ«lection Campaign. - Andy Borowitz





Trump Praises Michigan Protesters
On Thursday, armed protesters stormed the State Capitol in opposition to Gov. Gretchen Whitmer's executive orders, which have kept much of Michigan's economy closed since March to stop the spread of the coronavirus...On Friday, President Donald Trump took to Twitter for some mobster LARPing, and said Whitmer should "give a little, and put out the fire."
"These are very good people, but they are angry," Trump said. "They want their lives back again, safely! See them, talk to them, make a deal."


Y’alls President out here calling white nationalists and racists good people again. - Jemele Hill



All of these jackaloons protesting with weapons. The recruiting offices are empty.  How would you like to carry your weapon 24/7...even sleep with it.  Don’t request desk jobs. Go Infantry, Combat Engineer or Scouts.  Well...the recruiters are waiting! You aren’t scared are you? - Richard N. Ojeda, II


Republican Shenanigans

Getting a check with Trump's signature on it is the closest most of us will ever get to feeling like a porn star. - John Fugelsang






I Wonder If He'll "Fall Off" His Balcony
Russian Prime Minister Mikhail Mishustin told President Vladimir Putin on Thursday that he had been diagnosed with the coronavirus and was temporarily stepping down to recover.







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Rock The Voter News

Trump Mocks Low-energy Joe Biden For Only Having One Accuser. - Andy Borowitz





Let Them Eat Beignets!
While under the state's stay-at-home orders, Louisiana lawmakers voted by mail against the state's voters' ability to vote by mail in upcoming elections.
Republicans in the state's legislature objected to a plan that would allow absentee ballots for people who fear being exposed to the coronavirus, claiming that mail-in voting is ripe for voter fraud — despite voting for the legislation by mail.


Why do the #Dems always twist themselves into pretzels over this sh-t?  We heard Donald Trump say "I grab 'em by the pussy!" and no one made a peep!  Didn't seem to hurt him, but we have been paying ever since.  Who is paying to #SWIFTBOAT Joe Biden?? - Bette Midler




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Business/Tech News



I have to admit that I did not have "Elon Musk loses his sh-t" on my Plutocrat Pandemic F-cknuttery Bingo card. - Jeff Tiedrich




I Love Canada!
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced a ban on “military-style” assault weapons in the country. This includes the buying, selling, transporting, or use of these guns.
“There is no use and no place for such weapons in Canada,” Trudeau said.


The emperor has no tests. - Jeff Tiedrich






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Thank you!




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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
Trolltunga, Norway. I always yodel when jumping on a rock jutting out a mile above a waterway.

Best Wishes For A Beautiful and Peaceful Weekend.


Thursday, April 30, 2020

Congratulations, you successfully made it to the end of April

US intelligence says it's investigating COVID-19's origins
U.S. intelligence agencies in a rare public statement Thursday said they agreed with "the widespread scientific consensus" that the COVID-19 virus was "not man made or genetically modified" but also that they are investigating whether it emerged from a laboratory in Wuhan, China.


2016: 30,000 emails.

2020: 60,000 dead. - Middle Age Riot


America getting ready to reopen


The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Since the U.S. death toll surpassed 60,000 yesterday, Trump has tweeted about: 
-Michael Flynn 
-CNN-MSNBC 
-Brian Williams 
-Don Lemon 
-Joe Scarborough 
-Sweden 
-Roger Stone 
-His poll numbers 
-Jim Comey 
-Hillary Clinton’s campaign 
-Rep. Jim Ryun’s birthday- Philip Rucker, Washington Post





After One Tweet to Trump This Man Got $69 Million From New York For Ventilators
The Silicon Valley engineer, who had no background in medical supplies but was recommended by the White House, never delivered the ventilators.


Electing Donald Trump to drain the swamp is the political equivalent of drinking bleach to kill the coronavirus. - Middle Age Riot





Republican Shenanigans

Class Warfare is when top 1% uses the media to instruct you that a slight tax increase on the top 1% is Class Warfare. - John Fugelsang


Another Rat Flees The Sinking Ship
Joe Grogan, the top domestic policy adviser to President Donald Trump, who has played a key role in health policy and the coronavirus response, is set to leave the White House next month, he confirmed to POLITICO.






Jared Kushner spinning the current death count as a win is so on brand. It’s like Jared calling his father a law-abiding citizen, or himself fully human. - Rick Wilson




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I have a fun idea: why don’t we have Trumps personal doctor/ carny inject Trump with the coronavirus and then we can test out all his ideas on him and his family? There will be light everywhere. The best lights. Inside and out. - Chelsea Handler


Rock The Voter News




Once again, Trump said he inherited "broken" Covid-19 tests from Barack Obama.
Covid-19 DID NOT EXIST when Obama was President. - Mikel Jollett

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Business/Tech News

I wonder when Trump loses in 2020, if he'll end up a commentator on FOX news. - Erin Rogers





Texas Universities Will Reopen In The Fall, With Football
Texas Tech and Texas A&M universities are planning to reopen their campuses in the fall, the schools announced this week as states begin to loosen restrictions related to the coronavirus. 




40 years from now, when Millennials complain about how bad they had it:
"Okay, Plaguer." - George Takei




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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
Hubble Marks 30 Years in Space With Tapestry of  a Blazing Starbirth. A bit of beauty is much needed at this time.


Peace.