All Hat No Cattle

Thursday, January 16, 2020

Lev Parnas: Giuliani associate implicates Trump in Ukraine scheme

Lev Parnas: Giuliani associate implicates Trump in Ukraine scheme
Lev Parnas, the Soviet-born businessman whose work in Ukraine with President Donald Trump's personal attorney Rudy Giuliani stands at the center of the impeachment inquiry, implicated the President Wednesday in an interview with CNN in which he said that their efforts were "all ...

Giuliani Kidnapped By Ukrainian Circus. - Andy Borowitz

Burning down the White House!

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

The Lev Parnas revelations stunned many Americans who were unaware that there were people willing to associate with Giuliani.- Andy Borowitz

Ukraine Opens Investigation of Giuliani
Ukrainian authorities said Thursday they had opened a criminal investigation into whether the former US ambassador to Ukraine, Marie Yovanovitch was under surveillance by associates of Rudy Giuliani while in Kyiv last spring.

“The question is no longer ‘Should we impeach Mike Pence?’ ” one expert said. “The question is ‘How can we afford not to?’ - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

I don't know who's the puppet, Trump or the Attorney General. - Speaker Pelosi

Yep, Trump Broke The Law Withholding Aid To Ukraine. What's the Penalty?
Today, GAO issued a legal decision concluding that the Office of Management and Budget violated the law when it withheld approximately $214 million appropriated to DOD for security assistance to Ukraine. The President has narrow, limited authority to withhold appropriations under the Impoundment Control Act of 1974. OMB told GAO that it withheld the funds to ensure that they were not spent “in a manner that could conflict with the President’s foreign policy.” The law does not permit OMB to withhold funds for policy reasons.

No one in the GOP Congress is a public servant. They all work for Trump Housekeeping. And the place is a pigsty. - Scott Linnen

Jared Made the Cover of Time.
Trump Must Be Jealous. Good Move, Time!

I altered the cover ever so slightly

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“Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." — Abraham Lincoln

Rock The Voter News

Lev Parnas just reminded the American public live on CNN that Mike Pence is complicit. If you don’t know who Mike Pence is he’s the individual who Paul Manafort handpicked for Trump. - Daniel Uhlfelder

The FBI Rapid Response Team In Action!
FBI investigators went to the home and business of Connecticut congressional candidate Robert Hyde, who has been caught up in the scandal about efforts to remove US Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch from Ukraine on Thursday.

It's Goodfellas, but with morons. - Jeff Tiedrich

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Business/Tech News

Trump’s China deal:

-China agrees to buy $50B of ag products this year.

-That's a gain of $29B from before Trump tariffs.

-Trump tariffs have cost U.S. farmers $11B.

-U.S. taxpayers have spent $28B on emergency payouts to farmers.

-So loss to U.S. is $39B.

You do the math. - Robert Reich

Pelosi Pounces On Facebook
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) slammed tech giant Facebook on Thursday, accusing the social media company of abusing technology to mislead users and calling its behavior "shameful."
“The Facebook business model is strictly to make money. They don't care about the impact on children, they don't care about truth, they don't care about where this is all coming from, and they have said even if they know it's not true they will print it,” Pelosi said at a press conference.

It's been 6 months since I joined the gym and no progress. I'm going there in person tomorrow to see what's really going on. - Tony Starch

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Wednesday, January 15, 2020

McConnell courts GOP and Trump amid tensions over impeachment witnesses

McConnell courts GOP and Trump amid tensions over impeachment witnesses
The Senate majority leader is weighing strategy with key Republicans and keeping his plans close to the vest.

Remember when reporters were like Mitch has got the votes and a plan because he’s so savvy and then we found out last night he was still meeting with people like Ted Cruz to try to figure out how to do this and whether to call Hunter Biden? - Adam Parkhomenko

Please call Hunter Biden as a witness and Joe Biden. And while you're at it call Hillary and Obama, too!

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

After reading about what Trump had planned for #MarieYovanovitch, is there any doubt in your mind that the assassination of #Soleimani was a Trump-mob hit paid for by Saudi Arabia with the American Military doing the dirty work? - Dr. Jack Brown tweet

The Entire Russian Government Resigned. All of Them.
The entire Russian government is resigning, Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev announced on Russian state television Wednesday.
Russian President Vladimir Putin thanked members of the government for their work but added that "not everything worked out." Putin added that in the near future he will meet with each member of the cabinet.

Putin is extremely risk averse and almost never fires anyone. For him to sack the PM and change the constitution four years before his term is up suggests he’s deeply afraid of something. What that is, we have still to find out. - Bill Browder

We're sitting here, literally watching Trump plot the death of his own ambassador while the Senate Majority Leader openly refuses to do anything about it...

...and instead of taking the lead on this, Democratic Candidates are right now throwing shit at each other. Unbelievable. - Stonekettle tweet

Republican Shenanigans

Man Who Doesn't Understand How Toilets Work Doesn't Understand How Impeachment Works.- Jeff Tiedrich

Quid Pro Oooooohhhhhh
A lawyer for former U.S. Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch is calling for an investigation after materials released Tuesday night as part of the impeachment inquiry suggested she was under surveillance by individuals linked to President Trump's personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani.
That detail was among a trove of documents provided by Giuliani associate Lev Parnas that were made public by the House Intelligence Committee late Tuesday.

Just want to thank @RudyGiuliani for everything he has done getting @realDonaldTrump impeached and making it more difficult for the Senate to acquit him. - George Conway tweet

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Rock The Voter News

i guess its a good thing ambassador marie yovanovitch stayed off of 5th avenue in kiev. - mith tweet

Bishops Remind Texas Governor of Jesus' Words
All 16 of Texas' Catholic bishops have issued a joint statement slamming Gov. Greg Abbott, who is Catholic, for announcing the state will bar refugees in 2020.
The bishops call Abbott's decision "misguided" and say it "denies people who are fleeing persecution, including religious persecution, from being able to bring their gifts and talents to our state and contribute to the general common good of all Texans."
"As Catholics, an essential aspect of our faith is to welcome the stranger and care for the alien," the bishops say in the statement, issued Friday.

I refuse to sign my organ donor card until I get some kind of guarantee that no part of my body will ever be used to keep Mitch McConnell alive. - Middle Age Riot

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Business/Tech News

Can I just say: I’m grateful Amb. Yovanovitch got out of Ukraine alive. I’m grateful she had the courage to speak out about this criminal operation under oath. As for Giuliani & Donald “she’s going to go through some things” Trump (assuming they knew)? They are mafia-level trash. - Steven Beschloss

New Years Resolutions last week: Drink less, Get fit, Spend more time with my kids.

New Years Resolutions this week: Spend less time drinking around my fit kids. - Conan O'Brien

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Tuesday, January 14, 2020

Pelosi announces Wednesday vote on impeachment articles

Pelosi announces Wednesday vote on impeachment articles
After weeks of stalemate between Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, President Donald Trump's impeachment trial is finally coming together.

Not like Trump to go this long without Tweeting. Or his staff pretending they're him and tweeting out some Trump brand rage/hate.
Wonder who he's bombing now? - Stonekettle tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Iranians Confused After Trump Tweets “Covfefe” in Farsi. - Andy Borowitz

Russia Is Phishing For Hunter Biden
In the midst of the impeachment investigation into President Donald Trump, Russian hackers attacked the Ukrainian gas company linked to the inquiry, according to cybersecurity experts.
Researchers at Area 1, a security company run by a former National Security Agency official, said Russian hackers sent phishing emails to subsidiaries of Burisma Holdings to try to penetrate the Ukrainian energy company. The email accounts of Burisma employees were accessed, but it’s unclear how that was used

Trump rallies prove that a con man doesn't have to be smart if his victims are stupid enough. - Middle Age Riot

Republican Shenanigans

Fun fact. The press secretary has more DUI’s than she does press briefings. - irishrygirl

When Is The Media Going To Call Him The Liar That He Is?
President Donald Trump made a striking claim Monday, insisting it was he who ensured that people with preexisting medical problems will always be covered by health insurance.
He wasn’t.
He also complained anew that Democrats didn’t allow him to send lawyers to the impeachment inquiry. The opposite is true: Democrats invited him to send lawyers to the inquiry and he said no.

The irony is that the only way to save Iran is also the only way to save America - get the extreme religious conservatives out of power. - John Fugelsang

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Rock The Voter News

Bloomberg Offers Trump Ten Billion Dollars To Leave White House By End Of Day. - Andy Borowitz

Two-Thirds of Americans Want Bolton to Testify. Two-Thirds.
Around two-thirds of Americans want to see John Bolton testify in the Senate impeachment trial of President Donald Trump, a new poll has found.
The survey by Quinnipiac University published yesterday found that 66 percent of polled voters wanted the former national security adviser to appear before lawmakers in the chamber, while just 17 percent opposed the idea.

Sanders Campaign Doubles Down With New Ad Warning Americans They’ll Never Be Able To Hear A Female President Over The Sound Of Her Vacuum - The Onion

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