I will return tomorrow with my usual mocking of this totally inept administration.
Angela Merkel misses Obama as much as we do.
My amigos speared 36 fish yesterday. I ate one, then two.
Pura vida. See you tomorrow.Peace and pescado.
So, if...
1) A sittin' president can't be indicted, only impeached and...
2) This sittin' president's Attorney General won't release information to Congress necessary for impeachment...
Tell us again how "no one is above the law." - Tea Pain
America 2019: racists writing immigration policy, thieves writing economic policy, warmongers writing foreign policy, polluters writing environmental policy, ignoramuses writing science policy, a hired goon heading the department of justice and One F*cking Moron to Rule Them All - Jeff Tiedrich
Once again, Donald Trump will not be attending the White House Correspondents' Dinner.
Just because you are a joke doesn't mean you can take one.- Middle Age Riot
[whispers]
None of the female candidates have been accused of inappropriately touching anyone just FYI. - OhNoShe Twint
When @BarackObama was president, he released his tax returns every year by April 15th while he was being audited.
(IRS routinely audits every presidential tax return.) - Lawrence O'Donnell
“Forty percent of Americans don’t have an extra four hundred dollars to pay for something that might come up? Seriously? How is this a good economy?” ~ Harold Goodman
Dear All of the Websites,
No, none of us want to receive your in-browser alerts. Stop asking. Really. Just stop.
Sincerely,
Everyone
I wonder how many journalists have to be killed to satisfy the GOP.
A few weeks ago the House voted 420-0 for release of the full Mueller report. Today every Republican on the House Judiciary Committee voted no. What’s up? - Elie Honig
Trump is so scared of the Mueller Report being made public, you'd think it was his tax returns. - Stephen Colbert
If Trump gets dementia, how will we know? - Lawrence O'Donnell
Actually I only support infanticide when it’s directly on an open border, performed by a caravan of illegal immigrants & paid for by socialism.Then trans women in bathrooms confiscate all guns, followed by mandatory gay marriages where Sharia Law is imposed & all must eat kale. - John Fugelsang
Germany Demands Apology After Trump Claims Father Was Born There. - Andy Borowitz
Joe Biden now has 20% of the allegations needed to be president.
We live in a time when everyone still has to listen to Paul Ryan complain that AOC won't listen to Paul Ryan. - John Fugelsang
"Let's say Jenna has a 470 verbal score, but she needs 730 to get into Yale," DeVos said. "How much will she have to pay to get her score changed? - Andy Borowitz
It has been 38 days since Bernie Sanders announced he was releasing 10 years of tax returns and didn’t release anything, again. - Adam Parkhomenko
Republicans have no healthcare plan, they just hate ours. - Nancy Pelosi
A posh woman asked where I got my boots and I didn't want to say TJ Maxx, so I told her I won them in a bar fight. - Elizabeth Hackett