All Hat No Cattle

Monday, January 14, 2019

If Trump isn't a Russian agent, he's sure doing a good imitation of one

TRUMP REPORTEDLY CONFISCATED INTERPRETER’S NOTES TO KEEP PUTIN MEETING DETAILS SECRET
Just days after a bombshell report revealed that the F.B.I. investigated whether President Trump was working on behalf of Russian interests, more troubling details have emerged. Renewed scrutiny of five meetings Trump has held with Russian president Vladimir Putin has revealed surprising efforts to suppress any record of conversations between the two leaders—including Trump personally confiscating an interpreter’s notes.

Can an entire party be guilty of obstruction of justice? - Schooley tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

China used to be rather infamous for its long but ineffective wall and its big problem with opioids.
But sure, MAGA. - George Takei

Trump Ushers In Airport Insecurity
An airline passenger carried a gun through the TSA checkpoint at Atlanta’s airport and carried it all the way through to his overseas destination, according to a report from Channel 2 Action News.

If US politicians really wanted undocumented immigration to end, they'd start locking up the Americans who hire them. The demand for undocumented labor would swiftly end. They never talk about that. There's a giant "Help Wanted" sign at our border and it's not coming down. - John Fugelsang

Republican Shenanigans

Let me be clear, if the Republican Party won’t see to remove Chris Collins or Duncan Hunter from Congress, who are both currently under criminal indictments for insider trading and fraud, they won’t be removing Steve King after his endorsement of White Supremacy. - Ricky Davila

Peaches?
President Trump: "This is where I ask the Democrats to come back to Washington and to vote for money for the wall, the barrier, whatever you want to call it, it's okay with me. They can name it whatever they can -- name it Peaches."

Looks like a lot of America has already built a wall…around their hearts. (Conan drops mic, ascends to heaven) - Conan O'Brien

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Imagine if in 2016 the New York Times had informed its readers about Trump's fake charity or scam university or laundered Russian mob money, instead of nursing its 25-year-long grudge against Hillary Clinton. - Jeff Tiedrich

Rock The Voter News

No matter how you feel about her, Hillary warned us.
Over and over. - Andy Lassner

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There are more people in the Kremlin than in Washington who know what Trump said to Putin. - Tom Nichols

Business/Tech News

It’s mind blowing to watch as the press catches up to the Russia story like, “Can you BELIEVE all this happened?” when Hillary Clinton screamed it from the rooftops while the press ignored her and wrote about emails. - Mikel Jollett

Trump Mocks Man Over Divorce
President Trump on Sunday night mocked Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos as "Jeff Bozo" in a tweet slamming The Washington Post, which Bezos owns.

Too bad this isn't true.

“Don’t you love the Oxford Dictionary? When I first read it, I thought it was a really really long poem about everything.” ― David Bowie

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Friday, January 11, 2019

Trump loves holding the country hostage

Hard-right Freedom Caucus Republicans rebelling against Trump plan for a national emergency declaration: report
Members of the conservative small-government, anti-tax Freedom Caucus are having second thoughts about Donald Trump’s suggestion that he may declare a national state of emergency to get his border wall built.

Odd, how Donald Trump thinks thoughts and prayers will protect our schools, but not our borders. - Mrs. Betty Bowers

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

'It's pretty much inevitable' that Trump will try to stage a coup and overthrow democracy: Yale historian Tim Snyder

Who Does This?
Officials at Joshua Tree National Park say some of the iconic trees and landscape have been damaged by visitors and motorists during the government shutdown.

Government Shutdown Forces National Zoo To Turn Off Panda Suicide Cam - The Onion

Republican Shenanigans

"BYE-BYE!" shouts Trump, as he pounds his fist on the table, flings open the door and angrily strides right into the coat closet - Jeff Tiedrich

Manafort Isn't Holding Up Well
Jailed former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort is suffering from depression, anxiety and “severe gout” while behind bars, his lawyers say in new court filings.
Manafort is being kept in solitary confinement “to ensure his safety” but the conditions “have taken a toll on his physical and mental health,” his attorneys wrote in a document made public

It won’t be long until Donald Trump goes back to Puerto Rico and asks for the paper towels back. - Tony Posnanski

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Rock The Voter News

I’m offended by anyone calling Trump “motherf*cker” because it’s deeply insulting to Oedipus. -John Fugelsang

FBI Tells It Like It Is: The Shutdown Is A National Security Threat
The shutdown is a national security threat: "I'm not going to try to candy-coat it," said Tom O'Connor, the FBI Agents Association president. "We really feel that the financial insecurities we are facing right now equates to a national security issue."

If US politicians really wanted undocumented immigration to end, they'd start locking up the Americans who hire them. The demand for undocumented labor would swiftly end. They never talk about that. There's a giant "Help Wanted" sign at our border and it's not coming down. - John Fugelsang

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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“Build the Wall!!”

Meanwhile, Cubans

Trump is going to be left with a devout, but poor base that can’t afford to stay at any of his properties. He’s such a brilliant businessman. - Marie Connor

Business/Tech News

Air Traffic Controllers Sue Trump
The National Air Traffic Controllers Association on Friday sued the Trump administration over the continued partial government shutdown, saying airline controllers are being deprived ”of their hard-earned compensation without the requisite due process.”

If an air traffic controller is guiding my flight, I want her concentrating on getting my ass on the ground safely, *not* whether she can make her mortgage payment...- Ray Smith

The Senate just adjourned til Monday, ensuring this will be the longest U.S. government shutdown in history. - Manu Raju, CNN

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Wow, I found a video where Whitney Houston portrays me and Kevin Costner portrays you.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

Trump's team had over 100 contacts with Russian-linked officials, report shows

Trump's team had over 100 contacts with Russian-linked officials, report shows
Members of President Donald Trump's campaign and transition team had more than 100 contacts with Russian-linked officials, according to a new report.

If colluding with the Russians to win an election doesn't make Trump an illegitimate president, I don't know what does.

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Of course this could all just end up with him growing old & constantly tweeting to his angry white male loyalists about what a great deal he made from a golf course in a country with no extradition treaty. - John Fugelsang

Trump's Steel Slat Wall Can Be Cut With A Saw. Really.
Dept. of Homeland Security testing of a steel slat prototype for border wall proved it could be cut through with a saw, according to a report by DHS

We’re arrivin’ at a critical point in the Trump presidency. Should we impeach him for his corruption or his incompetence?
Heck, why not both? - Tea Pain tweet

Republican Shenanigans

I understand Baby Don did another tantrum today when mean old Mommy Nancy said he can’t have his border wall. - Stephen King

With the constant practice Trump gets at lying, you’d think he’d be better at it. - Mrs. Betty Bowers

Toxic Work Atmosphere
President Donald Trump’s latest director of communications was highly criticized in an explosive New York Times report. Bill Shine, a former Fox News executive, joined the administration after the departure of Hope Hicks. Now it appears he's not making any friends.

Evangelicals have successfully completed construction of a wall between them and Jesus. - Mrs. Betty Bowers

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President Trump: "I find China, frankly in many ways, to be far more honorable than cryin' Chuck and Nancy. I really do. I think that China is actually much easier to deal with than the opposition party."

Rock The Voter News

When they go low, we go Pelosi. -OhNoSheTwint

Back In 2016 I Couldn't Tell The Difference Between Bernie Bros & Russian Bots. Still Can't.
Top Bernie Sanders 2016 adviser accused of forcibly kissing subordinate.
The claim is the latest complaint about a hostile environment for women on the campaign. Robert Becker denied wrongdoing.

110 pounds of the opioid fentanyl was seized in the Port of Philadelphia. This is why we need a wall on the southern border.
Oh wait ....- Rep. Ted Lieu

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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Business/Tech News

Now that Donald Trump's trade wars are costing his supporters their jobs, they’ll have a lot more free time to spend on social media owning the libs.- Middle Age Riot tweet

Stormy Daniels Teaches Thong Folding During Trump's Speech
It didn’t last long, but they finished at the same time.
Porn star Stormy Daniels folded clothes on Instagram Live Tuesday night while President Trump went on live television to try and sell Americans on the idea that it’s necessary to build a wall on the nation’s southern border. Both broadcasts started at 9 p.m. and lasted 10 minutes. Daniels, who filmed the skit in her underwear, played Pink Floyd’s “Another Brick in the Wall" while doing her chores. She said she attracted 100,000 viewers.

Nobody in this hipster coffee shop seemed amused by me shouting "MEXICO WILL PAY FOR MY COFFEE!" as I walked out without paying. - Rex Huppke

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Getting closer...