All Hat No Cattle

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Roger Stone's Latest Smokescreen

Ex-Trump Aide Sam Nunberg Now Says He Is Likely To Cooperate With Mueller Subpoena
A former campaign aide to Donald Trump appears to have changed his mind and will not fight a subpoena he says he has received in the Russia investigation — after daring special counsel Robert Mueller to arrest him in multiple media appearances.

I have never seen anything like this in my life.
Sam Nunberg is imploding on live TV.
This is like OJ getting out of the white Bronco to do a press conference. - The Hoarse Whisperer

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Kim said that there was "no point in having nuclear weapons" now that the GOP has stolen his idea of destroying America. - Andy Borowitz

Bush Thrilled Trump Is An Idiot
Former President George W. Bush is reportedly pleased by at least one element of the Donald Trump presidency: It’s making him look better.

I told my kids that at their age I had to watch VHS tapes on school safety, and they said “what’s school safety?” - Conan O'Brien

Republican Shenanigans

"I smell racism on your breath" should be said to every Trump supporter who comes on a cable news show. - Frank Conniff

This Must Be Chum For His Evangelical Base
A notorious Republican official who has led quixotic crusades against pornography, unregulated stripping and medical marijuana has been appointed to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

In 2005 ms (condoleezza) rice called me into the state dept to tell me i needed to let my activist friends know that W couldn’t do anything about the genocide in darfur and, i quote, “you need to tell them to shut up...” true story ...- Don Cheadle tweet

The president is crying on the internet again. - LOLGOP

I think we are witnessing what scholars will later call.. the full Nunberg. - Jim Acosta, CNN

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Rock The Voter News

BREAKING: Education Secretary Betsy DeVos is being guarded by U.S. Marshals after she received a suspicious package containing a science textbook. - Andy Borowitz

I Miss The Obama Drama
A little girl who was transfixed by a portrait of Michelle Obama last week got to meet the real person Tuesday -- and even danced with the former first lady.
A photo of Parker Curry, 2, staring at Obama's portrait in the Smithsonian National Portrait Gallery went viral last week, attracting the attention of the former first lady.

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Business/Tech News

This is the worst time to put tariffs on steel. We are going to be needing so many prison bars soon. - Andy Borowitz

The Internet is a series of tubes. - Sen
Ted Stevens, GOP

Meanwhile, Elon Musk Wants To Provide Internet Everywhere
A pair of test satellites launched into orbit by SpaceX on Feb. 22 may herald the dawn of a truly global internet, one that makes high-speed service available not only in cities and in rural areas covered by cellphone towers but at almost any point on the planet.

March came in like a lion and was shot by some rich a-hole. - Conan O'Brien

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I fear my 3 yr old notebook is on its last legs. It is slow as molasses. I am far behind on answering emails and everything else online! So sorry!

My computer expert friend said it sounds like my motherboard. Ay yi yi yi.

I love this notebook. Darn.

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Monday, March 5, 2018

State Dept was granted $120 million to counter Russian interference but has spent none of it

State Dept was granted $120 million to counter Russian interference but has spent none of it
The State Department has yet to spend any of the $120 million allocated to it in order to address foreign efforts to interfere in U.S. elections, The New York Times reported on Sunday.
Because of the lack of spending, the Global Engagement Center, which is responsible for addressing Russia’s disinformation efforts, does not have a single Russian-speaking analyst, according to the Times.

Tillerson ignoring Russian Cyberwarfare is akin to waving a white flag of surrender. Frightening.

It's like America's a bus and an 71 year old narcissist speed addict is maniacally driving and we're all staring at each other because 30% of the passengers like how his driving upsets the rest of us. - John Fugelsang

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

It is now 17 days since Mueller’s criminal indictments against Russians for interfering in our democracy. And 4 days since Putin bragged about his nuclear capabilities using a video simulating hitting Florida. Why isn’t Trump doing anything-and Congress why are you allowing this?! - Amy Siskind

L-M-N-O-P

The Latest Trump Soap Opera Episode: The Sex Coach
From behind bars in a sweltering immigration detention center in Bangkok, a self-styled "sex coach" who claims to have detailed insider knowledge of Russian meddling in the US election says she wants to cooperate with US investigators.
The catch? She says the US government needs to grant her political asylum.

As folks catch up on the news of YouTube temporarily suspending the account of Infowars’ Jerome Corsi for false smears against survivors of a school schooling, re-familiarize yourself with the role he played in 2004 in falsely smearing the military service of John Kerry. - Jake Tapper

Florida State Senator Seems To Blame God For Not Answering Thoughts & Prayers
A Florida state senator said the only thing that is going to stop “the evil” behind mass shootings is to send “thoughts and prayers."
During a debate on a proposed assault weapons ban in the Florida legislature on Saturday, state Sen. Kelli Stargel (R) said she finds it offensive when people tell her that the kind words are not enough to stop mass shootings.

Disgusted Robert Mueller Eats 2 20-Piece Chicken McNugget Meals In One Sitting In Attempt To Get Into Trump’s Mind. - The Onion

Republican Shenanigans

It appears Melania may have come to US on an “Einstein visa,” for those w/extraordinary ability. Well, who else could put up with his sh*t? - Bette Midler

Jeezus, Trump Is Using The Presidential Seal For Golf Tees.
In recent weeks, the Trump Organization has ordered the manufacture of new tee markers for golf courses that are emblazoned with the seal of the President of the United States. Under federal law, the seal’s use is permitted only for official government business. Misuse can be a crime.

Having Trump as president is like tapping the drunkest guy at the party to be the designated driver. - Stephen King

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PROPOSAL: Rebrand shootings as "late-term abortion." Watch the GOP scramble to stop them. - goldengateblond

Rock The Voter News

Hey, kids—the House and Senate aren’t going to do anything about guns. Neither is the president, a morally vacant boob who will say anything. We have to do it ourselves. Get as many NRA sweethearts as possible out in November. We can do this. - Stephen King

Senate Turtle Choked Obama On Russian Interference
Former White House chief of staff Denis McDonough on Sunday defended the Obama administration's response to suspected Russian interference in the 2016 election, blaming Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell for what he called a "dramatically watered down" joint statement on election security in September 2016.

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Business/Tech News

Health Insurance CEO Reveals Key To Company’s Success Is Not Paying For Customers’ Medical Care. - The Onion

Rex Tillerson's Long Slick Fingers
If you live in a city or county that sues oil companies over climate change, prepare for a blowback. ExxonMobil and other fossil fuel giants are taking legal action against such local governments, seeking to undermine a key part of their finances — their relationship with lenders.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe - The Onion

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Friday, March 2, 2018

Organ music: Thanks for tuning in for another episode of "As the Treason Turns".

Wall Street Journal calls for Ivanka and Kushner to leave White House
The Wall Street Journal called on President Trump's daughter and son-in-law Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner on Friday to consider leaving their White House jobs, calling them a "political liability" in an already turbulent administration.

Republican Party Motto:
“We believe in small government that doesn’t interfere with businesses or personal liberties — unless you don’t share our extremist views on guns, gods, gays and gynecology.” - Mrs. Betty Bowers

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Trump plans to retaliate against President Vladimir Putin by
-still not implementing the bipartisan sanctions authorized by Congress
-still not granting NSA authority to disrupt Russian hacking of our next election
-demanding Hillary Clinton's impeachment.
- John Fugelsang

Trump Flips On Background Checks
The White House on Friday walked back President Trump’s apparent support for universal background checks for gun purchases.
Press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said Trump supports “not necessarily universal background checks, but certainly improving the background check system.”

Most amazing thing I have learned today.
MAGA - you know, like Make America Great Again - is in Nigerian parlance a word that means easily fooled idiot.
So, hey there all you MAGA folks - Nigeria knew what you were long before the rest of us did. - Kurt Eichenwald

Republican Shenanigans

Tucker Carlson has turned on Trump. Assaulting women, supporting Nazis and endorsing a child molester was ok with Tucker, but threatening to take away people's guns was just TOO MUCH. - Andy Borowitz

New reports say ISIS is plotting a chemical weapons attack on the US. At this hour, Alec Baldwin is likely more informed on the topic than Donald Trump. - Richard Hine

Trump Mixes Things Up A Bit. Worldwide Tariffs!
President Donald Trump said that he plans to impose a 25% tariff on imported steel and 10% tariff on imported aluminum. The announcement sent markets tumbling more than 500 points on Thursday.
The proposal has left beer and beverage companies wary. More than half of the beer produced every year in the U.S. is packed in aluminum cans or aluminum bottles.

Trump appears to be having a tariff tantrum.

I'd like to thank the US Judicial Branch for proving to the rest of the world that America proudly has one branch of govt that still, y'know, functions.- John Fugelsang

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Rock The Voter News

The “AR” in AR-15 actually stands for Ayn Rand, and the 15 is for the age you should realize her philosophy is poison. - Nate Patrin

The Peace Corps was established today in 1961 by JFK with executive order - portrayed here by Norman Rockwell

Be in like Flynn. FLIP! FLIP! FLIP!

Mueller Is On Kushner Like White On Rice. Oh My.
Federal investigators are scrutinizing whether any of Jared Kushner's business discussions with foreigners during the presidential transition later shaped White House policies in ways designed to either benefit or retaliate against those he spoke with, according to witnesses and other people familiar with the investigation.

Raise your hand if you are a presidential daughter not under FBI investigation

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Business/Tech News

The Dow just fell 500 points over Trump starting a Trade War with China over tariffs but I can't get to an AM radio to find out why it's Obama's fault. - John Fugelsang