Angela Merkel's Revenge Handshake

G20: Hamburg sees clashes between police and protesters
World leaders including US President Donald Trump are in Hamburg for talks on a wide range of issues.
The clashes began when police charged a group of anti-capitalist demonstrators at the march attended by thousands carrying banners with slogans such as "Welcome to hell" and "Smash G20".


The crowd of protesters in Hamburg is bigger than your inaugural crowd. Then again, so was the line at IHOP this morning. - @dumptrump33 tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

• German police disperse G20 protest with water cannon before summit
• Trump tries to shake the hand of Polish president’s wife — and gets rejected
• Trump greeted by Confederate flag during speech in Poland
• Trump: Obama Should Have Punished Russia, Which Might Be Innocent
• Social media mocks Trump for tweeting Fox News chyron error: "West Saved by the Blood of Patriarchs"
• CNN president: Trump is trying to bully us 
• Poll: Majority of Americans believe Trump did something illegal or unethical with Russia

The people who once taught you to hate Russia are now hating you for questioning Russia. - John Fugelsang

Trump Trashes Press, Intel Agencies While Overseas
President Donald Trump on Thursday morning declined to single out Russia for attempting to interfere in the United States’ 2016 election, arguing that it’s not completely clear that Russia was solely responsible for the hacking attempts.

So Trump just threatened North Korea, but told the world not to trust US media if it happens? - Richard Hine



Republican Shenanigans

• No luxury hotel for Trump: Staff waited too long to book a room
• W.H. advisers have discussed using Time Warner's pending merger with AT&T as a point of leverage over CNN
• Republicans try to shift health-care blame back to Democrats
• Government ethics director who prodded Trump resigns
• Ethics Watchdog Files Complaint About Kushner’s Stake In Real Estate Startup
• Why is Lindsay Lohan Defending Donald Trump, Who Once Said 'Deeply Troubled' Star is Probably 'Great in Bed'?
• A Republican State Senator Is Accused Of Sexually Assaulting His Uber Driver

The GOP's healthcare plan is like a heckler who spends 8 yrs mocking the headliner, then gets called onstage and has zero material. - John Fugelsang



Georgia Has Serious Voting Problems
 Georgia's electronic touchscreen voting system is so riddled with problems that the results of the most expensive House race in U.S. history should be tossed out and a new election held, according to a lawsuit filed by a government watchdog group and six Georgia voters.

Trump voter: Doc, I'm sick.

Dr: (hands him bottle)

Trump voter: Antibiotics?

Dr: No, those aren't covered. That's full of liberal tears. - OhNoSheTwitnt‏


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Rock The Voter News

• 19 Dem attorneys general sue DeVos over student loan protections: report
• The GOP tried to troll Hillary Clinton. It backfired spectacularly
• Bernie Sanders plans health care rallies in red states

Our country was founded by people who were mad at King George because he refused to show us his taxation statements. - Conan O'Brien

Republicans Are Totally Inept
Senate Republicans are highly unlikely to vote next week to repeal Obamacare and are tentatively preparing for a vote in approximately two ...

Good thing Hobby Lobby was just smuggling ancient Iraqi artifacts and not birth control. Because THAT would've been un-Christian. - Rex Huppke


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Business/Tech News

• Art of the steal: Liquidation sale at Trump's former casino
• Microsoft plans thousands of job cuts in a sales staff overhaul to fuel cloud growth
• Wall Street falls on weak ADP jobs data, North Korea tensions
• Missouri to lower minimum wage in St. Louis while other cities continue hikes
• Hobby Lobby fined $3 million for artifacts smuggled from Iraq

CNN is not fake news. We know that because when they make mistakes, they acknowledge it. Something our fake president has never once done. - Chelsea Handler

Freedom Of Speech Has No Limits At GoDaddy
Top internet domain registrar GoDaddy.com has a rule against hosting websites that it deems to be “morally offensive” — and yet it has no problem hosting neo-Nazi websites like the Daily Stormer.

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FUNDRAISER

Thank you!

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Odd News

• Antarctica is shedding a colossal iceberg that could fill Lake Michigan
• Montana Earthquake Is Felt For Hundreds Of Miles Early Thursday
• United Airlines forces woman to hold 2-year-old on lap during flight
• Video shows flyer with loose dog yelling at flight attendant
• Device thought to be WWII-era bomb is actually time capsule

Time To Deflate Photo

Blue Glowing Coconut Octopus. She's twirling her skirt!

Peace.

Polish Rent-a-Crowds Ready to Cheer Trump

Polish Rent-a-Crowds Ready to Cheer Trump in Warsaw—Especially if He Attacks the EU
The populism Team Trump once hoped would destroy the European Union has been defeated in the West. But it remains strong, in power, and increasingly authoritarian in the East.



If you're US, Happy Independence from England
If you're Canadian, Happy Codependence w/England
If you're England-please take us back
#July4
- John Fugelsang

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

• Pentagon says US defenses can counter threat from any North Korean ICBM
• Eglin Air Force Base Warns to Steer Clear of Smoke After Explosion
• Getting A Grip On the Latest Hacking Attacks
• More than 100 people shot in Chicago over long Fourth of July weekend

Trump on Friday:  "What else could I do?  Putin said nice things about me so I gave him Alaska back." - Tea Pain

I Wonder How Putin Will React To The Verdict
Prime Minister Mark Rutte is pleased that those responsible for downing flight MH17 will be prosecuted in the Netherlands, calling the decision the "next step on the way to finding the truth." The Dutch government is also signing a treaty with the Ukraine on Friday that will allow for prosecution on behalf of all 298 victims, not only the 196 Dutch, AD reports.





Poll: Growing Support for Plan to Drop Chris Christie on North Korea - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

• Poll: Trump's 'face-lift' tweet crossed line
• Donald Trump Sold Son Eric Two Condos at Half-Price, Avoided Major Taxes
• Chris Christie Gets Roasted With a Detailed Sand Sculpture of His Day at the Beach
• GOP Rep. Deletes Posts Suggesting Hillary Clinton As Libyan Ambassador
• Trump Supporters Go Nuts And Scream Liberal Bias After NPR Tweets The Declaration Of Independence
• GOP lawmaker apologizes for filming video in an Auschwitz gas chamber
• Kathy Griffin Reportedly Interrogated for More Than an Hour as Part of Ongoing Secret Service Investigation
• Donald Trump's old golf clubs are up for auction (and they're going for a staggeringly high price)
• Lindsay Lohan Defends Donald Trump: 'Stop Bullying Him and Start Trusting Him'
• Kentucky seeks stricter Medicaid work requirements

At this point, getting Trump's tweets banned from Twitter amounts to suppression of evidence for future trials & lawsuits. - John Fugelsang

Gag Me With A Spoon
Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski reached their biggest audience ever when they talked Friday about President Donald Trump’s tweets about their show.
The Nielsen company said Wednesday that 1.66 million people watched the MSNBC morning show the day after the tweets. That narrowly beat the show’s previous record, which came the day after Trump was elected last year.







FUN FACT: Both Pres. Nixon and Pres.Trump were "beneficiaries of dirty tricks hatched by Roger Ailes and Roger Stone." One down & one to go. - Bette Midler

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Let's just remind all these #25thAmendmentNow folks that President Mike Pence would have all the evil but half the entertainment value. - John Fugelsang


Rock The Voter News

• Poll: Majority of GOP, Dems supports ObamaCare's birth control mandate
• Appeals Court Says EPA Can't Keep Delaying Obama-Era Methane Rules
• Tropical Storm Don could form today, and one group is upping its hurricane outlook
• School districts rethink meal debt policies that shame kids

Americans Like Angela Merkel More Than Trump
A majority of Americans say they have more confidence in German Chancellor Angela Merkel as a leader than they do in President Trump, according to a Pew Research survey published Wednesday.





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Not much feeling like 4th of July this year. Maybe I’ll wait until Trump goes to prison to celebrate “InThePenDance Day.” - Bette Midler



Business/Tech News

• Crude Oil 45.68
• The Federal Reserve is divided over its longer-term path
• Judge Orders Martin Shkreli to Shut Up
• Ancient Romans made world's 'most durable' concrete. We might use it to stop rising seas.

-What's all this coal waste in our water supply, Daddy?
-Oh that's just President Trump getting big govt regulations off our backs, son. - John Fugelsang

Birds Of A Feather Flock Together
Trump campaign email vendors are marketing an anti-aging cream with the help of conspiracy theories surrounding the 2016 murder of a Democratic Party staffer.

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Odd News

• Instead Of Breaking Up The Party, Asheville, NC, Police Join In
• Amelia Earhart Survived Plane Crash, History Channel Documentary Claims
• People are now snorting chocolate to get high
• Lyme Disease Is Spreading, And It's Partly This Mouse's Fault
• Flying ants invade Wimbledon on warmest day of tournament

Time To Deflate Photo

Wow. But, no, no and no.

Peace.

Happy 4th of July

A Reddit user who wrote about stabbing Muslims is claiming credit for Trump's CNN video
The user whose screen name is a vulgar corruption of “Han Solo” spent about a year on Reddit before attaining stardom, courtesy of a share from President Trump.
Some posts were unpopular. “That cat would be in a blender if it did that to me,” for instance. Or recollections of visits to Paris armed with “punch blades,” in case a Muslim needed to be stabbed in the neck.



Jesus, you know there is some idiot out there that is going to attack a CNN employee because of Trump's tweet. Do you think he did that to distract us? He's acting like a cornered animal. I imagine Robert Mueller is taking note.



"Trump is the first white man who moved in a house after a black man and made the property value go down". - D.L. Hughley

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

• Emmanuel Macron assassination plot foiled by French police
• Arab nations extend deadline in Qatar crisis by 48 hours
• China vows to step up air and sea patrols after US warship sails near disputed island
• After Angering China, Trump Talks With Its Leader About North Korea
• US no longer a 'friend' in Merkel election program
• Trump vows to help Charlie Gard, the terminally ill infant at center of British legal battle

Oh No. Russia Is Impatiently Whining. 
Russia said Monday that its “patience is running out” with the United States to return its diplomatic property seized as part of sanctions imposed over alleged interference in the 2016 presidential election campaign. A few weeks before his term ended, President Barack Obama closed two Russian compounds in New York and Maryland and expelled 35 diplomats.

Our country was founded by people who were mad at King George because he refused to show us his taxation statements.- Conan O'Brien

Republican Shenanigans

• 7 in 10 Americans say level of civility has gotten worse under Trump. New poll 
• DOJ’s corporate crime watchdog resigns saying Trump administration makes it impossible to do her job
• ‘What do you tell your daughter?’: CNN’s Whitfield rakes GOP Rep over the coals about Trump tweets
• Melania Trump is against cyberbullying (that is, unless Donald is doing the bullying)
• Pro-confederate ‘patriot’ mistakenly shoots himself
• Ex-Trump campaign official called ‘danger to the community’ over charges he raped 17 women and girls
• Donald Trump is spending July Fourth weekend 200 miles away from the White House

Let's be clear: Trump's "fake news" obsession is about HONEST news coverage that is unfavorable to him. Pandering to his shrinking base. - Stephen King

Trump accused Mika Brzezinski of getting plastic surgery, which is odd, because that’s the only thing covered by his healthcare plan. - Jimmy Fallon



Astronaut Has Facial Conniptions Listening To Trump 
Buzz Aldrin floored as Trump humiliates himself attempting to talk about science and space

President Trump hosted the first fundraiser for his 2020 re-election campaign. The event was black tie, but white guests. - Seth Myers

Voter Data Grab Nixed By Two Of The Original Colonies
Maryland and Connecticut joined the growing list of states refusing to comply with President Donald Trump’s election integrity commission that many have accused of promoting voter fraud — and did so in harsh terms.



I’m going to say something I didn’t think was possible anymore: I am shocked by something Donald Trump said. I thought, by now, that my soul had calcified into a crouton. Not true, because today, the president of the United States tweeted, “How come low I.Q. Crazy Mika, along with Psycho Joe, came to Mar-a-Lago 3 nights in a row around New Year’s Eve, and insisted on joining me. She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!”
First of all, someone bleeding badly at your door, and you say no? Sounds like your healthcare plan. I mean, turning them away from your hotel during the middle of winter is literally the story of Christmas. Only there wasn’t a wise man in sight. - Stephen Colbert

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Rock The Voter News

• Court Blocks EPA Effort to Suspend Obama-Era Methane Rule
• WATCH: Clintons cheered by NYC theater audience

Of course, the first lady defended her husband via her spokesperson: “As the first lady has stated publicly in the past, when her husband gets attacked, he will punch back 10 times harder.” Yes, as the first lady says, “When they go low, we go 10 times lower.” - Stephen Colbert



Tony Soprano Wannabe Caught In The Act
In my 23 years as a photo journalist, I've been on enough stakeouts to know when I've been made, and Gov. Chris Christie looked right at me as I pointed the long-range lens at him from a small plane about a thousand feet above Island Beach State Park in Berkeley Township on Sunday.

[Ben Franklin's ghost appears] "Happy birthday, USA! How fare ye?"
Me: "We call our reps and beg them not to kill us"
BFG: "What the fuck?" - Jeff Tiedrich



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 The July 4th holiday, or as your dog calls it, PTSD Day. -  Seth Myers

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Odd News

• Scientists baffled by strange sea creatures near Alaska
• Man finds out small house is actually 300-year-old log cabin
• Never mind: Police say would-be robber apologizes to clerk
• PETA Asked Why Anyone Would Ever Eat Bacon. It Didn’t Go So Well.
• NASA Politely Clarifies It Is Not Running A Child Slave Colony On Mars

Time To Deflate Photo

Wave Rock, Western Australia. Aw, surf's not up!

Peace.