Friday, July 24, 2015

Sigh, another mass shooting.






Louisiana gunman was a ‘drifter’ and self-described taxpayer watchdog who tried and failed to get rich quick
Police have identified the gunman who killed two women and wounded seven other people at a Louisiana movie theater before fatally shooting himself.



We're using science to reduce car deaths to historic lows. Congress won't even let us study how to reduce gun deaths. - LOLGOP









The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam



I completely and fully support your second amendment right to be well-regulated.- LOLGOP






Kicking People When They Are Down Is Bad Politics
 Residents of this dusty village are bracing for Israeli bulldozers to come and knock down their makeshift homes of tarp, wood and wire any day now.









And as his plan to have Trump make Scott Walker look moderate unfolds, Satan giggles and throws a few table scraps to a burning Nixon.- John Fugelsang










Republican Shenanigans





The State Of The Other 15 GOP Candidates
They have been holding mock debates, hunkering down with advisers and finessing policy answers. But the most pressing concern for many Republican presidential contenders as they prepare for the first debate of the 2016 primary season is one man: Donald Trump.






"A major Iowa newspaper published an op-ed against Trump calling him a 'self-absorbed, wholly unqualified feckless blowhard.' Or as Trump put it, 'You forgot very rich . . . I'm a very rich, self-absorbed, wholly unqualified feckless blowhard. Very, very rich.'" –Jimmy Fallon










Why, Of Course The Louisiana Gunman Was A Right Winger And Not A Libturd!
The gunman who killed two moviegoers and wounded nine others had a prolific online commenting history that revealed a fascination with censorship, Iran, and right-wing politics.













"Ohio Governor John Kasich became the 16th Republican to announce that he is running for president. During his speech he referred to Jesus Christ, which is ironic because so did Americans when they heard another Republican was running for president." –Jimmy Fallon









Senate GOP Attempts End Around Play To Repeal OBAMACARE!
Senate Republicans will finally take a shot at their great white whale, but their first vote to repeal Obamacare since taking over the Senate majority in January will come as an amendment to a highway bill and be held on a Sunday in late July. It's not exactly the headline-making confrontation with the President over his signature legislation that conservatives have been hankering for.






Rock The Voter News



The people who always told us pot makes you lazy are now telling us it made Sandra Bland violent. - John Fugelsang









The real risk of smoking marijuana is that you could end up President of the United States.- LOLGOP





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Costa Rica Catholics Are Not In Denial
Roughly a month after Pope Francis made his appeal for the global community to “urgently” take action to address climate change and other environmental damage, Costa Rica’s Catholic Church is looking to take a stronger stance nationally on the environment.









Business/Tech News



"It'll be a very classy, very luxurious border wall. Probably the classiest border wall of all time." — Donald Trump's immigration policy









Obama Admits The U.S. Lacks Common Sense
President Barack Obama highlighted that gun violence had killed far more Americans than terrorism since 9/11 on Thursday and said it was "distressing" how the country lacked "common-sense" laws to tackle the problem.




I would love to see the Venn diagram of Donald Trump supporters and people who love Adam Sandler movies.- Jeff Tiedrich









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I NEED YOUR HELP!

A creative AHNC viewer sent me three logos he created, and being the typical blonde, I can't make up my mind. I love them all!

This is where you come in, please vote below!




Which logo do you like the best?

1
2
3
make a poll






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Odd News




Time To Deflate Photo


The tallest mountains on earth, the Himalayas, from space. Photo/NASA

Peace.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Republican Outreach Talking Points





Donald Trump Threatens Third-Party Candidacy
Donald J. Trump has been roiling Republicans by attacking his rivals on their weak poll numbers and questioning their energy (Jeb Bush) and intelligence (Rick Perry).
But the larger threat that he poses to the party is the prospect that he could opt out and run as a third-party candidate. True to form, Mr. Trump is keeping the option open.



Having Donald Trump as President would pretty much eliminate immigration.- Andy Borowitz






Looking forward to the GOP's "Immigrants are Rapists and American Women Should Be Forced to Bear Their Children 2016" campaign.- LOLGOP






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam




If the GOP really thinks Iran is going to cheat no matter what, they'll get their war anyway. Their real fear is that Iran will comply.- LOLGOP











Iran Debate
The first prominent face-off in the debate over the proposed nuclear agreement with Iran opened Thursday morning as Obama administration officials were confronted by skeptical members of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee.












Calling immigrants "rapists" gave Donald Trump's GOP poll numbers an erection.- LOLGOP











Republican Shenanigans






Trump Blames Unions For Messing Up His Border Tour
After a local Border Patrol union in Laredo, Texas, pulled out of its Thursday tour of the U.S.-Mexico border with Donald Trump, the real estate mogul blamed the cancellation on "pressure at the national level."









Maybe, just maybe, all of the Republican candidates losing to Trump are also complete jokes. - LOLGOP









Swing State Sanity!
A majority of voters in three key swing states for the 2016 presidential election agree with Pope Francis’ calls to confront climate change. Voters in Colorado, Iowa and Virginia also said they believe climate change is caused by human activity, Quinnipiac University found in a poll released Wednesday.




Why do all these scientists persist in pursuing climate change, which has no biblical basis, when they should be trying to resurrect Reagan?- Tea Party Cat










Rock The Voter News




So cops can't just murder people in their custody after they pull them over for no reason? Jeez, you liberals have soooo many rules!- Tea Party Cat







The idea that black people deserve violence for daring to live in a country they were dragged to has been with us since our founding.- LOLGOP




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Canada Beats USA For Largest Land Oil Spill In North America!
By the time a contractor spotted a burst in the wall of an Alberta tar sands pipeline on July 15, a spill was already well underway. In a public apology on Friday, the pipeline’s owner, Nexen Energy, announced the spill was contained, but the cause, and the length of time it had been spilling, was still unknown. Thirty-one thousand barrels (roughly 1.3 million gallons) of bitumen, water and sand had spilled—a greater volume than even the 2010 Kalamazoo River spill in Michigan, still the largest land spill in the U.S.










Business/Tech News



If undocumented corporations came across the border at least America would treat them like people.- John Fugelsang











Apple Broke Antitrust Rules?
A consumer group is asking federal regulators to look at whether Apple broke antitrust rules while establishing its new music service.














WebMD says I’m a schizophrenic. We laughed and laughed. - JokeBlogger.com







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Odd News




Time To Deflate Photo


Birds of a feather flocked together.

Peace.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Trump: I gave out Lindsey Graham's phone number 'for fun'





Trump: I gave out Lindsey Graham's phone number 'for fun'
Donald Trump has no regrets about giving out Lindsey Graham’s cellphone number on Tuesday.
In fact, Trump said Wednesday, he “did it for fun.”




From the party that used family values to impeach Clinton, we bring you Donald Trump's 9-point lead.- John Fugelsang











The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam




AM radio has taught me that Obama is both Neville Chamberlain AND Hitler. Which means his evil plan is to appease himself.- John Fugelsang










Christian Conservatives And The Pope
Pope Francis is not as popular a pontiff as he used to be in the United States — especially among conservatives — according to a new Gallup survey out Wednesday.









Jeb Bush: “My plan to invade Iraq is about heritage, not oil.”- Tea Party Cat




Republican Shenanigans




Suggesting that Trump is just a clown gives Republicans too much credit. They didn't take him seriously until he became a racist clown.- LOLGOP












Chutzpah: Jeb Denouncing Lobbyists At Event Organized By Lobbyists
In his speech in Tallahassee, Florida, on Monday denouncing the influence of lobbyists, Jeb Bush neglected to mention one critical detail: The event was organized by a powerful corporate lobbying group that has helped financially support his White House bid.

















In a new campaign ad, Jeb Bush referenced “The Godfather” and said his nickname used to be “Veto Corleone” because he vetoed so many bills in Florida. When you’re the third person in your family to run for president, maybe you shouldn’t bring up a movie trilogy where the third one was clearly the worst.- Jimmy Fallon









Birds Of A Feather Flock Together
The man behind Donald Trump’s presidential campaign has a knack for spectacle, an eye toward making money and a proven willingness to defy the Republican Party.
In other words, Trump campaign manager Corey Lewandowski is a lot like his new boss.








Republicans in Congress are getting concerned that President Obama will try to use the final year of his term to push through too many controversial laws. Obama would’ve responded but he was busy drafting his new "mandatory Mexican gay weed" bill.- Jimmy Fallon





Rock The Voter News




The White House is making a special Twitter account to answer questions about the new nuclear agreement. Finally using Twitter for what it was designed for — explaining complex, international nuclear agreements involving several nations.- Seth Myers










Another Reason Why Black People Don't Trust The Police
Just one day after Sandra Bland was found dead in her jail cell in Texas, another young black woman, Kindra Chapman, was found in eerily similar circumstances in a jail cell in Alabama.





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Men Fired For Flying Gigantic Confederate Flag On Their Pickups
Two ex-employees of an Alabama construction company allege they were fired this week for refusing to remove Confederate flags from their vehicles.








Lindsey Graham holds a press conference to announce that he does not have Prince Albert in the can, please stop calling him.- Jeff Tiedrich



Business/Tech News








I will be going to the border tomorrow to personally inspect a truckload of suits coming in from my Mexican factory. - Donald Drumf Tweet





Trump Set To Invade Border Town
Donald Trump's colorful presidential campaign heads to the U.S.-Mexico border on Thursday, where the billionaire businessman is sure to expand on his controversial comments about immigrants.

He'll travel to Laredo, Texas, for a tour with U.S. border patrol agents.








A former Iowa lottery official was found guilty yesterday of rigging a computerized "Hot Lotto" game so he could win a $14 million jackpot. He now faces up to 5, 12, 14, 20, or 25 years in prison.- Seth Myers









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Odd News






Time To Deflate Photo

Original Michelin Man, smoking a cigar while wearing roller skates, in 1910.

Peace.