Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Trump Wins Nevada

Trump: ‘I Love the Poorly Educated’
After his Nevada caucus win, presidential candidate Donald Trump, said: “We won the evangelicals, we won with young, we won with old, we won with highly educated, we won with poorly educated! I love the poorly educated.

"Trump says what we think." - people who don't think. - John Fugelsang

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

U.S. officials say that ISIS is facing a severe strain on its cash supply. ISIS blames it on poor oversight, economic sanctions, and betting all their money on the Carolina Panthers.- Conan O'Brien

Trump/Scott 2016?
On Monday, Rick Scott said he wasn’t ready to endorse in Florida’s presidential primary election on March 15, but there are those who believe he might be leaning towards Donald Trump.
That speculation was sparked last month, when Scott penned an op-ed in USA Today, a column in which he wrote very favorably about the New York City billionaire real estate developer.

George W. Bush was a little confused why Jeb quit because he was losing. Because as far as George W. Bush is concerned, you still become president even when you don't get the most votes.- James Corden

Republican Shenanigans

There is a way to stop Trump, but it involves persuading the fifty million dumbest voters to leave the country.- Andy Borowitz

The Vagina Regulators Are Also Pharmacists!!
The Oklahoma Supreme Court on Tuesday upheld a law aimed at limiting the use of abortion-inducing drugs, overturning a lower court decision that said the measure was unconstitutional because it did not apply to other medication.

Starting with Reagan, Quayle, George W Bush, Palin and leading inexorably to Trump, the GOP has come to revere ignorance as the most important quality in a candidate. I don't understand why America's kids are loading up on student debt if the actual ideal of our society is to be as ill-informed as possible.- Andy Borowitz

 Click here

If I were a zillionaire, I run ads reminding America what's at stake in the Supreme Court -- Roe, VRA, marriage, Social Security, the planet. - LOLGOP

Dirty water at Fort Myers Beach
 Cheryl Cagle Jones/Facebook

Florida Is Killing Itself 
Just in time for tourist season, both of Florida's coasts are being flooded by dark, polluted water that's killing ocean creatures and turning away would-be swimmers, fishermen, and other visitors.

John Kasich over the weekend said lots of women have left their kitchens to work on his campaign. Yeah, that will certainly help the upcoming election of 1956.- James Corden

Rock The Voter News

Meanwhile, The Adult In D.C. Is Carrying Out His Constitutional Duty
Move quickly — but not too quickly.
That’s the strategy President Obama and his top aides appear to be adopting as they work through the process of nominating a successor to the late Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia.

You almost need a Ouija board to understand the shots Sanders and Clinton lob at each other. Trump called Cruz a "weak little baby."- LOLGOP

 Click here to meet C.W.

When asked about the possibility that Mexico might not agree to pay for his border wall, Donald Trump said, "The wall just got 10 feet higher.” People in Mexico were like, “OK, well, our tunnels are exactly the same."- Jimmy Fallon

Business/Tech News

Government regulators have released a new statement saying that no hover board scooter currently on the market meets proper safety standards. The other thing hover board scooters don’t meet: women.- Seth Myers

Iran's Conservative Media Ups Reward For Author Rushdie
The fatwa issued 27 years ago by Iran's then-supreme leader calling for Salman Rushdie to be killed seems like a relic of a bygone era.
But not to a group of hard-line Iranian media organizations that announced it has raised $600,000 to add to a bounty for the death of the British novelist for writing "The Satanic Verses."



Thank you!


Odd News
Time To Deflate Photo

My viewers are so much smarter than moi!

Hi Lisa,

Again many thanks for all your great work!

It looks like you didn't realize the photo of the Schafberg
(literally "Sheep Mountain") in Austria is kind of an Internet joke.
Someone just exerted quite a lot of lateral compression on the original
photo to make everything look much steeper than reality.

You can find the original photo here:

It's still pretty steep, though.

Take care. You are wonderful!

Joerg the Swiss guy


I'm a regular visitor to AHNC, and I always find the site informative and
hilarious. But, judging by the others I've seen, I think your "Time to
Deflate" photo of Schafberg mountain needs an inflate.



Thank you for writing and setting AHNC straight!

Below is the photo that Joerg linked to...

Inflated or deflated this is a gorgeous place. Photo by Tomas Vocelka.

Here's Today's Time To Deflate Photo

The Baby Tortoise Army!


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