All Hat No Cattle

Monday, August 6, 2018

Trump tweets himself into legal jeopardy

President urged to stop tweeting on Trump Tower meeting
President Donald Trump has been urged to stop tweeting about the 2016 Trump Tower meeting between Trump's top advisers and several Russians, a source familiar with discussions tells CNN.

Russian Orphans Devastated After Realizing Trump Tower Meeting Not About Getting Them Adopted- The Onion

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

The one who really reached out and grabbed a pussy is Putin. - Linwood Barclay

Trump Tweets Insults At LeBron James
Donald Trump attacked the basketball superstar LeBron James in a late-night Twitter rant on Friday about an interview the Los Angeles Lakers player did with Don Lemon on CNN.
Trump tweeted that Lemon “made Lebron look smart, which isn’t easy to do”, in response to a conversation the two men had about Trump’s previous attacks on black athletes, including the football player Colin Kaepernick, who protested against racial injustice in the US by kneeling for the national anthem at NFL games.

LeBron James Challenges Trump to Spelling Contest - Andy Borowitz

Manafort had a 10k karaoke machine, spent a million dollars on suits, & had a huge, M-shaped flowerbed in his yard -- all while owing tens of millions to Russians and Ukrainians and lying to the IRS. With business skills and taste like that, HE coulda been president. - Bette Midler

High-End Persian Rugs Attend Trial In Show Of Support For Paul Manafort - The Onion

Republican Shenanigans

My advice to media re: out of control Trump driven crowd hostility at his rallies; boycott them. Send in an AP pool reporter and AP pool photog. Nothing more. Take away his oxygen for a while.- Mike Murphy, GOP strategist

I'm not wired.

Hope Hicks Spotted Boarding AF1. Is Trump Witness Tampering?
Former White House Communications Director Hope Hicks was spotted boarding Air Force One on Saturday ahead of President Donald Trump’s rally in Ohio, according to reporters in the White House press pool.

me: bye bye, Alex Jones
deplorable: WHAT ABOUT THE FIRST AMENDMENT, LIBTARD
me: well now the first amendment only applies to the governm—
deplorable: FREE SPEECH! FREE SPEECH, LIBTARD
me: you're not listeni—
deplorable: WHAT ABOUT ALL THE PEOPLE HILLARY KILLED
me: [headdesk]
- Jeff Tiedrich

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The fact that #Trump is crazy & Russia CHOSE HIM, and helped him become President is all one thing. The fact that so many Americans are okay, even happy about it, is terrifying. We’ve got to right the ship. VOTE! - Bette Midler

Rock The Voter News

Trump Aides Legal Fees Covered!
Longtime associates and political allies of President Donald Trump forked over tens of thousands of dollars this year for his aides' legal defense in the ongoing Russia probe, according to quarterly filings obtained by POLITICO Monday.

"You pray for the hungry. Then you feed them. That's how prayer works." Pope Francis

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Business/Tech News

At this very moment in the basement of a pizza parlor that has no basement, Hillary Clinton, George Soros and Jerry Brown are plotting to let the entire west coast burn to the ground. - Jeff Tiedrich

Chopped chicken liver lover.

George Costanza Likes KFC?
There's yet another new face for KFC -- and this time, it's the face of George Costanza.
The fried-chicken chain announced in a press release Monday that its newest Colonel Sanders is Jason Alexander, the actor and comedian best known for his work in the television show “Seinfeld.

Seedless Watermelon Coming To Grips With Fact It’ll Never Be Able To Have Kids - The Onion

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Friday, August 3, 2018

Trump 2020

Trump To Decide Whether To Meet With Mueller Within 10 Days, Giuliani Says
President Donald Trump will decide once and for all whether to sit down with special counsel Robert Mueller within a week to 10 days, his lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, said Thursday.
“I think our decisions will get made in the next week to 10 days,” Giuliani, who leads Trump’s legal team, told Politico. Trump may yet reject the interview, he added.

"Right now there’s a Republican in the White House who is lying to all of us at an unprecedented rate, so it’s time for those in his fold to speak truth to power. America needs you right now." - Matt Laslo, NBC News

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Hey guys call me crazy but I'm pretty sure that the guy who sides with Putin and Xi and Kim against America's own interests has no business calling anyone an "enemy of the people" - Jeff Tiedrich

Meanwhile, Putin Is Trying To Acquire More Land
As the barbed-wire fence edges closer, so does the prospect that Vasya might one day wake up on Russian-controlled soil.
The craggy-faced cattle farmer finds himself on the front line of a geopolitical struggle between Russia and the West.
Ignoring Washington's warnings, Moscow-backed troops have been moving a disputed border deeper into Georgia, a former Soviet republic that is now a staunch U.S. ally.

On this day in 1967, 45,000 soldiers were sent to Vietnam. That’s the same year Trump developed bone spurs. - irishygirl

Trump Thumps Mexicans Again
President Trump appeared to double down on comments he made calling Mexican immigrants “rapists” during a rally on Thursday night...“Guess what,” he continued, “what I said is peanuts compared to what turns out to be the truth. It’s peanuts.”

President Trump held a giant rally in Tampa last night with thousands of people in attendance. The crowd was very diverse. It was half white, half Caucasian.- Jimmy Fallon

Republican Shenanigans

The Ivanka Trump image rehabilitation tour is already a mess. - Roland Scahill

The Trump Sump Pumping Continues
President Donald Trump is renewing his campaign against the media, claiming at a Pennsylvania rally that the media is the “fake, fake disgusting news” and casting journalists as his true political opponent.

Sarah Sanders is always filmed from behind a podium because she doesn’t want anyone to see that her pants are on fire. - OhNoSheTwint

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Barack Obama, president of the United States: I was born in America.
Trump: LIAR! PROVE IT! EVEN AFTER YOU PROVE IT I WON’T BELIEVE YOU!
Kim Jong-un, North Korean dictator: These are the remains of American soldiers who died in the Korean War.
Trump: Good enough for me.
- OhNoSheTwint

Rock The Voter News

President Trump said this morning that the Russia investigation is a hoax tweeting, "The Democrats paid for the phony and discredited dossier which was, along with Comey, McCabe, Strzok, and his lover, the lovely Lisa Page, used to begin the witch hunt. Disgraceful." And I love that even in the middle of a meltdown over the investigation, he still has time to hit on a woman. "This is a hoax, and a witch hunt, and oh, hello there."- Seth Meyers

Mueller Interviews the "Manhattan Madam." Yeah, You Read That Right.
CNN reported Friday that special counsel Robert Mueller interviewed Kristin Davis, the woman who found fame as the “Manhattan Madam” in the sex scandal that ended the political career of former Gov. Eliot Spitzer (D-NY).
The voluntary interview reportedly occurred on Wednesday.

In times like this, I feel it is entirely appropriate for reporters at the next White House press briefing to throw rotten tomatoes instead of questions.

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The USDA has issued a health alert over premade salads and wraps sold at Walgreens due to concerns they may be contaminated with an intestinal parasite. So, if you're buying your meals at Walgreens, I have even more bad news.- Seth Meyers

Business/Tech News

#MAGA: They're stealing our jobs!!!
Yes Gary, with your high school diploma, Muhammad the neurologist is stealing your job. - Ali

China Is Fighting Back
China’s Unipec, the trading arm of state oil major Sinopec, has suspended crude oil imports from the United States due to a growing trade spat between Washington and Beijing, three sources familiar with the situation said on Friday.

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Thursday, August 2, 2018

I wonder when the next shooting of journalists will occur because of this administration

White House Repeatedly Refuses To Say Journos Aren’t ‘Enemy Of The People’
Asked Thursday to say definitively that the media aren’t an “enemy of the people,” as administration staffer and presidential daughter Ivanka Trump did earlier in the day, White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders refused to do so multiple times.

I walked out of the end of that briefing because I am totally saddened by what just happened. Sarah Sanders was repeatedly given a chance to say the press is not the enemy and she wouldn't do it. Shameful. - Jim Acosta, CNN

The Trump administration is like the Corleones - except everyone is Fredo. - Don Winslow

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Hannity is a propagandist for profit, peddling lies every night. He says he’s just a talk show host, not a journalist. But he’s injecting poison into the nation’s political bloodstream warping public attitudes about the press. I’m confident in the long run the truth will prevail. - Jim Acosta, CNN

What Do You Do When There's A
Russian Investigation Going On? You Go To Russia With Ayn Rand Paul!
Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) is planning to lead a U.S. delegation to Moscow on Monday.
Paul and other lawmakers will reportedly meet with Russian members of parliament, senior lawmaker Konstantin Kosachov said on Thursday.

"I am not in a position fully to understand what happened in Helsinki," says Dan Coats, DNI, nearly three weeks after Trump and Putin met privately for more than 2 hours

Republican Shenanigans

Overheard:
Biden: I'm going to tell Trump you need I.D. to go to church.
Obama: Joe.
Biden: C'mon. He's never been. He wouldn't know, right?- George Takei

Ivanka Trump Distraught After Learning Detained Migrant Children Completely Without Sewing Machines - The Onion

Oh Look, A Documentary On Trump & The Russian Mob
A documentary filmmaker appeared on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” on Thursday to talk about what he’s found while researching “Active Measures,” his new movie about Russian connections with President Donald Trump.
Specifically, filmmaker Jack Bryan told the program that Trump didn’t really start getting involved with members of the Russian mob until around 2002, when he claims they started “entering the Trump Organization.”

I'm not sure what Trump’s spirit animal is, but I’m sure it has rabies. - irishygirl

Imagine being a child of Mike Huckabee who didn’t murder a dog and still being the worst person in your family.- irishygirl

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It’s like they have a single shirt they pass around when they want to communicate with The Poors. - goldengateblond tweet

It's been a week since the deadline for the administration to reunify families it split up at the border. More than 559 children are still reportedly separated from their parents. #FamiliesBelongTogether - Hillary Clinton

Rock The Voter News

Jesus was the original innocent brown-skinned man executed by the state. - John Fugelsang

Lo and Behold, A Hero Shows Up
A Vietnam War veteran drew attention this week after pulling down a Confederate flag from a flagpole in New Jersey, saying he could not stand to see it fly.

Evangelicals spent decades warning us about the antichrist. When he showed up, they elected him president. - Bishop Talbert Swan

A kid had to grow up and dunk a million basketballs to provide his community with basic services.

That should bother you.

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Why does Facebook have such an easy time banning nipples but such a hard time banning assholes? - Wendy Wasserman Schultz

Business/Tech News

Do the people screaming obscenities at the high paid CNN correspondent understand that they just gave him a tax cut at the expense of their own access to healthcare? - Bradley Whitfield