All Hat No Cattle

Thursday, January 1, 2026

Happy 2026! ObamaCare subsidies expire; premiums spike for millions

ObamaCare subsidies expire; premiums spike for millions

After months of fighting and countless proposals for a bipartisan compromise, the expiration date for the Affordable Care Act (ACA) enhanced premium tax subsidies has arrived, with millions of Americans set to feel the pain.

Thought for 2026: The midterms are our chance to do to Trump’s presidency what he did to the East Wing.- Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Trump

Hegseth Apologizes After Striking Drug Boat Carrying Don Jr.’s Supply - Andy Borowitz

Shame On A Woman Protecting Pedos, A Woman!

White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt slammed the Wall Street Journal for their “shameful” report claiming that President Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago spa sent teen workers to Jeffrey Epstein’s mansion.

Leavitt defended Trump against the publication’s claims in an interview with TMZ...According to the report by the Journal, former Mar-a-Lago and Epstein employees said the spa sent employees to Epstein’s Palm Beach mansion for massages, manicures, and “other spa services.”

Desperate DOJ Hires Undocumented Workers to Redact 5 Million Epstein Files - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Zohran Mamdani, a 34-year-old immigrant from Uganda, just made history as the first Muslim, first South Asian, and youngest in a century to become Mayor of New York City.

President Fat Ass Calls Exercise Boring

President Donald Trump blasted critics questioning his stamina and health in a new interview where he also dismissed traditional exercise as “boring.”

The president, however, denied any health issues and touted his “good genetics.”

Seems like a good day to remind everyone that Trump has sued over jokes, tweets, interviews, and news articles but not once over any of the countless accusations of child rape. — That silence says everything. - Andrea Junker

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Rock The Voter News

Got a new TV for Christmas?

Put your old broken one in the box of the new one and watch a porch pirate take it for free.

Follow me for more life hacks. - PlanetOfMemes

Musk Jumps On The Lock Walz Up Bandwagon

Tesla CEO and X owner Elon Musk called for Minnesota Democratic Gov. Tim Walz to be imprisoned amid reports of rampant fraud in the state.

Musk quote tweeted a post from conservative commentator Brandon Tatum who said that Walz didn’t want the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) because it would expose fraud.

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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Business/Tech News

Trump Cuts Ticket Prices at Kennedy Center 5000% - Andy Borowitz

Trump Kennedy Center to Host an Evening of Sad Trombones - Andy Borowitz

College Football Has Been Turned Into Money Football
On January 1, 2026, the College Football Playoff (CFP) continues, bringing football excitement to households across the U.S. But, the playoffs look a bit different this season, since officials have moved to a straight seeding model that aligns first-round byes more closely with overall performance, not just conference championships.

Just so I'm clear, most Americans don't realize what was done to college football.

I’m not jealous of George Clooney for being a rich, handsome movie star, but I am jealous that he just got French citizenship. - Andy Borowitz

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Monday, December 22, 2025

Happy Holidays!!!

I wish you all the happiest of holidays as we sure need it.

I'll return on January 1, 2026. I'm attending to all the construction activity going on, such as serving lunch, water and cervesa aka beer. Also, my email was down half the day and is still messed up, power went out several times, and this has exhausted me. I abhor getting old.

I won't leave you empty handed so here are a few memes for your viewing pleasure.

Things are progressing nicely and I'm getting an unexpected concrete fence. The steel framing for the roof is up but my email won't send the latest photos. Just shoot me. Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanzaa and happy everything!

Wait, whut? My emails just came through...here is the latest photo.

Yeah, it is hot here!

Holiday love to you all.

Honestly, I don't want a brand new year...

I want a gently used one. Maybe a 2013. I'd even take a 1995 if it's still in decent condition.

Friday, December 19, 2025

DOJ won’t meet Friday deadline to release all the Epstein files

DOJ won’t meet Friday deadline to release all the Epstein files

The delay means the White House is in apparent conflict with a law President Donald Trump signed in November.

Does Trump realize that putting his name on the Kennedy Center isn’t going to take his name off the Epstein files? - The Other 98%

The World Is A Safer Place Without Trump

Pam Bondi Passes Out from Sharpie Fumes after Redaction Marathon. - Andy Borowitz

Sanctions on Maduro's Family? Oh, That'll Work.

The Trump administration on Friday announced a fresh batch of sanctions targeting extended family members of Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro amid an ongoing pressure campaign against the embattled leader

Just to be clear. It’s the John F Kennedy center legally.

Just like it’s still the department of defense. - Adam Kinzinger

Republican Shenanigans

Trump Renames RFK Jr. “Bobby Trump Kennedy” - Andy Borowitz

Mitt Romney Wants To Tax The Rich and He's Right!

Former Republican presidential nominee and Utah senator Mitt Romney called for higher taxes on the rich, including himself, in a New York Times guest essay published Friday, warning that the U.S. is barreling toward a fiscal crisis if major changes are not made to entitlement programs and the tax code.

BREAKING: My followers have unanimously voted to rename the Epstein files the Trump-Epstein files. - Covie

If Trump really wants to put his name on something I nominate Chernobyl. - Andy Borowitz

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http://www.cwblogsite.com/

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Rock The Voter News

Susie Wiles Corrects Earlier Comment: “Actually, He Has a Coke Addict’s Personality” - Andy Borowitz

Wow, I Agree With A Fox Host!
Fox & Friends host Brian Kilmeade broke with several conservative pundits at The Five roundtable on Thursday by rebuking President Donald Trump’s “troll” plaques attacking predecessors on a newly unveiled “Presidential Walk of Fame” at the White House... noting the move could invite a cycle of rewriting from political opponents who come into office later: “So they’re just going to mock President Trump or put something on his plaque.”

This Epstein thing is the most disgraceful sht I’ve ever witnessed in my life.

Every single person in the DOJ needs to be removed. And then Congress, and then the White House. - Vance Murphy

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http://www.wattensawpress.com/

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Business/Tech News

The Trump-Kennedy center sounds like a place where kids either get raped or measles. - Covie

Whitey Tighties Encouraged To Claim Discrimination

Andrea Lucas, the chair of the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC), called on white men to come forward with employment and workplace discrimination complaints.

Lucas said Wednesday in a video on the social platform X that white men may have a claim to recover money under federal civil rights laws, and should contact the EEOC as soon as possible.

When this s--tshow is over, all the assets of the Trump family should be seized to pay for the reconstruction of the USA. - Andy Borowitz

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Time To Deflate Photo

And the construction continues. He is fast. I would not be surprised if it is finished by Christmas. I could cry.

Peace.