Wednesday, March 26, 2025

Bombshell Text Release Shows Trump Officials Were BSing Senators — Under Oath — Hours Earlier



Bombshell Text Release Shows Trump Officials Were BSing Senators — Under Oath — Hours Earlier
Texts released by The Atlantic show that Trump Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard and CIA Director John Ratcliffe were BSing, at a minimum, when they testified about the content of the group chat.




Well, they lied. Obviously. - Pete Buttigieg








The World Is A Safer Place Without Trump


This is why past Presidents chose career professionals over Fox News hosts for top cabinet positions.









People are now referring to Pete Hegseth as “WhiskiLeaks”





This Is Why One Shouldn't Burn Their Bridges
The same federal judge who has been publicly and vociferously criticized by President Donald Trump for rulings he didn’t like in an immigration case has now been assigned to preside over a new lawsuit filed regarding the shocking leak of a Signal group chat after a journalist was inadvertently added.










REPUBLICANS: "Let's have an illegal, unsecured chat on sensitive national security issues!" 

JOURNALIST: "I was in the chat and have receipts. But I won't publish all because it was so sensitive."

REPUBLICANS: "Let's insult him!"

JOURNALIST: [releases the whole chat]

These are not smart people. - Mrs. Betty Bowers










Trump is reportedly furious that the Russians may have intercepted the US’s classified war plans because he prefers to reveal them to Putin himself. - Andy Borowitz







Republican Shenanigans


If you’re banning Anne Frank in public schools, you’ve pretty much told us what your plans are for this country. - Al Cappuccino



Trump has no idea what his Cabinet is doing but is closely tracking every unflattering portrait of himself across America.





Nothing "OwNs ThE LiBs" quite like crashing the economy and leaking war plans. Next up: stealing Granny's social security check.




Everyone Knows Hegseth Has A Drinking Problem EXCEPT the CIA!









Let’s talk about the elephant in the room 

Project 2025 calls for using public channels of communication (like Signal) instead of secure government channels, to subvert FOIA requests and conceal damning information from the public. This was no rookie mistake. It's the plan. - Puk Arks











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Rock The Voter News


Turkeyneck - Adam Schiff 
Peekaboo - Leticia James 
Pocahontas -Elizabeth Warren 
Palestinian - Chuck Schumer (Using an entire nationality as an insult is wild) 
R*tarded- Kamala Harris

All said by 47. 

Spare me the pearl clutching about Hot Wheels. - KerrBear










Trump Ensures The Death of Poor People
President Donald Trump's administration plans to end U.S. funding for Gavi, an organization that helps buy vaccines for children in poor countries, and will scale back efforts to combat malaria, among thousands of cuts revealed in a document prepared by the U.S. Agency for International Development.











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Business/Tech News


If Elon is mass firing thousands of people who didn’t do anything wrong, but Trump won’t fire anyone after Signal Gate, the message is that accountability is only for people at the bottom. People at the top can get away with anything. - Zaid Jilani



Tuesday, March 25, 2025

Trump’s Faith Adviser Promises '7 Supernatural Blessings' for $1,000 — Including God Going After Your Enemies


Trump’s Faith Adviser Promises '7 Supernatural Blessings' for $1,000 — Including God Going After Your Enemies
President Donald Trump’s White House faith adviser Paula White is urging her followers to send her ministry $1,000 before Easter in order to “release 7 specific supernatural blessings” that include God assigning an angel to you, being an enemy to your enemies, giving you prosperity, and curing sicknesses.



If there is a God, he's gonna send another plague.








The World Is A Safer Place Without Trump



The law the First Felon is using to justify deporting Khalil was ruled unconstitutional over 20 years ago by…
*checks notes*
Judge Maryanne Trump








Trump Is Trying To Sweep Leaked War Plans Debacle Under the Rug. 









Jeffrey Goldberg thinking he was being pranked and then realizing he was actually just in the war plans group chat is such a good microcosm of how it feels to be alive right now, everything seems fake until you realize it’s actually real and incredibly stupid. - jelenawoehr










Shout out to Jeffrey Goldberg
for reporting on this now instead of waiting two years to put it in a book.










Republican Shenanigans


Kim Jong Un Demands to be Included in all Future Hegseth Group Chats. - Andy Borowitz








GOP Moves To Impeach Two Judges
Republican lawmakers moved on Monday to have two judges impeached as the White House and its allies continue ramping up attacks on members of the judiciary for imposing roadblocks on U.S. President Donald Trump's sweeping assertions of power.








Sen. Ron Wyden: "I'm of the view that there ought to be resignations, starting with the national security adviser and the secretary of defense."







When did firing veterans, park rangers, scientists, and air traffic controllers become a better idea than simply taxing billionaires? - Molly Ploofkins









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Rock The Voter News


Hegseth gets angry when he denies his mistakes. This is common for alcoholics. - Alex Cole







Democrats Trying To Avoid the Abyss
Top Democrats are demanding President Trump immediately reinstate two commissioners who were fired from the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) just days after he took office.







Wait, wait, WAIT—- Steve Witkoff, Trump’s envoy to the Middle East was sitting in the f**king KREMLIN while texting on an unsecured group chat about classified war plans!?!?

Are you f**king kidding me?!?! - JoJoFromJerz







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Business/Tech News


Don't Americans understand how unpopular Trump is making the US? - Anders Ã…slund







Dear God, Gov. DeSantis Wants To Employ Children To Replace Undocumented Immigrants.









I wonder what the sane generals serving under Hegseth are thinking right now.








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Odd News




Time To Deflate Photo

Mount Taranaki, New Zealand.

Peace.


Monday, March 24, 2025

‘Amateur hour’: Washington aghast at Trump administration's war plan group chat





Democratic lawmakers also called for investigations and hearings on the incident.



Pete Hegseth: “Under the previous administration, we looked like fools. Not anymore.”








The World Is A Safer Place Without Trump








Americans Demand Breathalyzer Be Attached to Pete Hegseth’s Phone. - Andy Borowitz






Peter Magyar, the guy that's now destroying Hungary's Russian-backed kleptocrat Victor Orban in the polls calls for millions to rise up and stop the country from falling into Putin's dirty little rat claws. - Jay in Kyiv







I Wonder How Greenland Will Greet The VP's Wife. Snowballs?








Another diplomatic first (& not in a good way): the prime minister of Greenland calls a visit by the U.S. second lady and high level officials “highly aggressive”. Greenland and Denmark say they did not invite this U.S. delegation. - Christiane Amanpour, CNN









Republican Shenanigans


"We tend to be in court a lot. It's what they like to do. These rogue judges have to stop. This is an executive decision."

- Alina Habba Counselor to the President








FOX News Preparing MAGA For the Inevitable



Still waiting for the Palestine protesters that chanted “Genocide Joe” to hold a single f**king protest against the guy that wants to level all of the land for condos. - Derek








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Rock The Voter News


Come on Democrats. The Secretary of Defense was drunk texting plans of a highly classified military operation. Get on tv. Call it treason. Demand a criminal investigation. Call for resignations. And when they cover it up, Call for the public to support impeachment. This is a slam dunk. - BlackKnight10K









Tariffs, Tariffs and MORE TARIFFS!
President Donald Trump on Monday threatened to impose a 25 percent tariff on countries that purchase oil or gas from Venezuela — escalating tensions with the country that has been a primary target of his administration’s sweeping deportation efforts.









Kristi Noem Stars in “Annie Get Your Gun” at Kennedy Center. - Andy Borowitz








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Business/Tech News


Why is it a crime to vandalize a shi**y Tesla but not to vandalize Social Security? - Andy Borowitz









Apparently, Vanessa Trump Has Terrible Taste In Men








Hey guys remember the Hillary Clinton email server?
Seems kinda, small today, doesn’t it? - Adam Kinzinger