Monday, April 23, 2018

Happy Monday

Russian lawyer who met with top Trump campaign officials says Mueller hasn't contacted her
The Russian lawyer who top Trump campaign officials were told had compromising information on Hillary Clinton ahead of a June 2016 meeting told the Associated Press on Sunday that she is surprised she has not been contacted by special counsel Robert Mueller


Mueller team said to be amused as Giuliani pledges to end Russia probe. - Andy Borowitz





 The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

The Waffle House shooter wanted to meet Trump. The Parkland school shooter wrote a letter to Trump. The Quebec mosque shooter was obsessed with Trump’s Twitter. Trump himself said he could shoot someone and not lose any supporters. Trump is a one-man terrorist organization.- OhNoSheTwint




Trump Creates Russian Sanction Loopholes!
U.S. officials will consider easing sanctions on Rusal, an aluminum producer controlled by a businessman with ties to Russian President Vladimir Putin, the Treasury Department announced Monday.


Everyone is talking about Donald Trump's potentially epic summit with Kim Jong Un. It's the dispute of the ill-fitting suits! The men with nukes putting up their dukes! "In this corner, weighing in at 239 pounds, ha-ha, with the terrible haircut, a man-child who had everything handed to him by his father. And in the other corner: The exact same thing! Let’s get ready to bumble!”- Stephen Colbert







 Is John Bolton Anti- Muslim? Yep.
 John Bolton, President Donald Trump’s new national security adviser, chaired a nonprofit that has promoted misleading and false anti-Muslim news, some of which was amplified by a Russian troll factory, an NBC News review found.









Republican Shenanigans

“Like most Americans, I had totally forgotten about Rudy Giuliani’s existence,” Mueller said.- Andy Borowitz





Flight Records Confirm Trump's Moscow Sleepover. Where's His Fixer?
President Donald Trump twice gave James Comey an alibi for why a salacious report about the 2013 Miss Universe pageant in Moscow couldn’t be true: He never even spent the night in Russia during that trip, Trump told the former FBI director, according to Comey’s memos about the conversations...Now, flight records obtained by Bloomberg provide to-the-minute details, from wheels down to departure.


Happy Confederate Memorial Day - I haven't seen this many people celebrating the side that actually lost since Trump's inaugural. - John Fugelsang





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Sarah Sanders: "Democrats have to decide whether they love this country more than they hate this president.” 
Me: Nah. I can multitask. - The Hoarse Whisperer





Rock The Voter News





Add "make Melania smile" to the long list of things Obama can do that Trump can't. - Jeff Tiedrich


What A Smile Melania!
Donald Trump may have chosen not to attend Barbara Bush’s funeral on Saturday, but social media users still found a way to talk about him in his absence.
After the president’s wife Melania Trump was spotted smiling and sharing a laugh with Barack Obama before the service in Houston, it didn’t take long before social media users began to joke about how even though she was at a funeral, she appeared to be having a good time away from her husband.






Barbara Bush's funeral ends, and Melania Trump returns to her day job: waiting for Donald to die. - Jeff Tiedrich



If Trump Did Attend Barbara Bush's Funeral


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Obamas are half-way home from Bush funeral. They hear a thump in the back seat, pull over to find Melania hiding. “Can I stay with you?” - Jess McLaren





Business/Tech News





Poll: Most Americans Believe Hannity Will Somehow Appear In Pee Tape. - Andy Borowitz




Is Hannity Headed To A Calamity?
Fingers Crossed!
Fox News host who said Trump’s fixer ‘knows real estate’ has a portfolio that includes support from Department of Housing, a fact he did not mention when interviewing Ben Carson last year





Of course, it all started last week when two black men, Donte Robinson and Rashon Nelson, were in a Philadelphia Starbucks waiting for a friend. They didn't order anything immediately, so they were arrested and marched out in handcuffs. That is a grievous racial injustice. And if you witness anything like this, for the love of God, don't film it in portrait mode! Film it in landscape! You're missing all the racism on the sides. - Stephen Colbert




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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

In a routine flyover in the Arctic ocean earlier this month, a NASA scientist photographed images of mysterious ice holes over the eastern Beaufort Sea. The holes appear to be the first of their kind ever captured on film, and researchers are struggling to understand what they are and how they got there.
My guess is they are the air vents for that ancient civilization that lives underground there. Amirite?
Is that an igloo village in the lower right?

Peace.

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Friday, April 20, 2018

What A Week It Was

The DOJ's 'freakishly unusual' move to hand over Comey's memos to Congress alarms former officials
The significance of the memos' release stems not from their content, but from the potential long-term implications regarding the DOJ's independence.
"If it weren't so comical, it would be a tragedy," said one former federal


Michael Cohen once said he would take a bullet for Donald Trump. Robert Mueller was like, “Oh, great, stand right there, you want a cigarette or anything?” - Jimmy Kimmel





 The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

I really, really, really want to see Donald Trump spell “Rudy Giuliani.” -Conan O'Brien






Democrats Are Suing The Russians & More!
...The Washington Post reported Friday that the DNC filed the multi-million dollar lawsuit in federal district court in Manhattan. 
“During the 2016 presidential campaign, Russia launched an all-out assault on our democracy, and it found a willing and active partner in Donald Trump’s campaign,” DNC chair Tom Perez said in a statement. 





"After Columbine, public outrage forced America to enact common sense gun laws which prevented future school shootings."
- Excerpt from an 'If the NRA didn't exist' alternate history textbook
- Erik Bransteen





Republican Shenanigans

#Happy420, Jeff Sessions. I know you hate marijuana, but maybe give it a try… you might get so high you’ll forget how to be racist. - Chelsea Handler




Why Wasn't This Reported During The 2016 Election?
A former reporter for Forbes magazine claims that President Trump lied to him decades ago about his net worth to snatch a coveted spot on the Forbes 400 Richest list.
Jonathan Greenblatt wrote in an op-ed for The Washington Post that Trump was "telling a lie so cosmic that people believed that some kernel of it had to be real."


FOX should have a viewer discretion advised label on every show. This way viewers will know that the material they are watching can be harmful to their health. -irishygirl tweet





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FUN FACT: Donald Trump was sued twice today before lunch time. - Tea Pain




Rock The Voter News

My My My. FBI Official Is Suing Trump.
Former Deputy FBI Director Andrew McCabe is planning to sue the Trump administration for defamation and wrongful termination, according to multiple media reports Friday.
McCabe’s lawyer Michael Bromwich told reporters that McCabe is also considering filing other civil claims.




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Anyone else having trouble absorbing all the terrible news and getting your work done and sleeping through the night and reading all the books and watching all the TV shows? - Emily Nussbaum


This is what it's like being a black man in America. This brother is getting his license, registration and insurance papers ready to hand to the cop in broad daylight and look what the cop is doing.


Business/Tech News

Trump views the North Korea crisis as his "great man" of history moment. Yes, the greatest presidents end up on our currency. Donald Trump could end up on our hush money.- Stephen Colbert






 Live In Brooklyn? YOU'VE GOT MAIL!
A New York mailman has been arrested for stockpiling thousands of pieces of undelivered mail, spanning almost 15 years.
The man, Aleksey Germash, 53, has been with the U.S. Postal Service for 16 years, before his bosses received a tip about a  parked car with 20 bags of undelivered mail, close to the Dyker Heights, Brooklyn post office to which was recently assigned. 








Researchers in Asia have developed a robot that is capable of assembling furniture from Ikea. Completely true! The robot assembled an Ikea chair in just about 20 minutes. If you think this will save you a lot of time, think again. The first step is, you've got to assemble the robots. - James Corden





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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Tulips protesting winter.

Best Wishes For A Peaceful Weekend.


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Thursday, April 19, 2018

How to remove Trump in three easy steps

Rudy Giuliani joins Trump legal team, hopes to end Russia probe in ‘a week or two’
Rudy Giuliani said Thursday that he will join President Trump’s legal team and hopes to bring an end to the special counsel’s investigation into Russian election meddling in “a week or two.”


The interesting part of the qualification for Speaker of the House, is you do not have to be an elected member of Congress. The Democrats could elect any American they want to be Speaker. They could return a stolen election to its rightful owner by following the Constitution, if they are brave enough.


"Waiter? Yeah, we specifically ordered the Totalitarian Authoritarian Washington-Outsider #MAGA Special but I think you brought us Bush's 3rd Term with Russian Dressing." - John Fugelsang





 The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

The Nikki Haley story reminds me of the folk tale about the mountaineer who took in a pet rattlesnake that would coil up and sit in his lap in front of the fire at night. When the snake finally bit him, the dying man asked, “Why?”
“Well,” the answer came, I am a rattlesnake after all. You knew that.” - Jimmie von Tungeln


Nikki Haley better be packing up her office.
My My My. Michael Cohen Drops Libel Suits About The Dossier
Embattled attorney Michael Cohen has dropped a pair of much-touted libel suits against BuzzFeed and the private investigation firm Fusion GPS over publication of the so-called dossier detailing alleged ties between President Donald Trump and Russia.





Once again, President Trump has referred to Mar-a-Lago as "the Southern White House." Of course, when Trump refers to the actual White House, he refers to it as "the Western Kremlin."- Conan O'Brien




Republican Shenanigans

Yesterday, after Ambassador Nikki Haley told the U.N. that the United States was going to level more sanctions against Russia, the White House quickly contradicted her, saying she suffered from "momentary confusion." It's got to hurt, being called "confused" by the Trump White House. That's like being called hateful and mean-spirited by . . . well, by the Trump White House.- James Conden





I Love To Wake Up In The Morning To Republican Infighting
Sen. Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) on Thursday defended his decision to move legislation protecting special counsel Robert Mueller despite Majority Leader Mitch McConnell's (R-Ky.) opposition.
"Obviously, the majority leader's views are important to consider, but they do not govern what happens here in the Judiciary Committee,"...


Trump and Melania had dinner with Japan’s Prime Minister Shinzo Abe and his wife. There was an awkward moment when Trump kept yelling at the waiter, "This sushi is raw! Send it back!" - Jimmy Fallon





FBI Tells Michael Cohen He Will Need Better-fitting Jacket to Wear a Wire. - Andy Borowitz


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Rock The Voter News




Republicans in Congress are urging the FBI to launch an investigation into Hillary Clinton. Man, Hillary Clinton – what did she do over two years ago NOW?- Conan O'Brien






Trump Vendetta #2,779,022 Or Is McCabe Guilty?
The Department of Justice Office of the Inspector General on Thursday sent the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia a criminal referral regarding former deputy FBI director Andrew McCabe







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Business/Tech News

The Kremlin bestowed its highest honor on Trump after he refused to impose sanctions on Russia. - Andy Borowitz




Lawyers Are Starting Their Engines
Despite the praise Southwest Airlines is drawing from passengers for the valiant efforts of its crew during the deadly ordeal of Flight 1380, the airline still likely faces tens of millions of dollars in legal damages from those on board, experts say.


Before Instagram there were no options for desperate Americans who needed pics of what someone else got at Starbucks. - John Fugelsang


Where are you Spring?


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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

The Salvador Dali Museum in St. Petersburg, Florida. Early in his career, Dali was shunned by his fellow artists who accused him of copying their work. Now, he has a museum.

Peace.


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