Thursday, February 8, 2018

The White House Soap Opera Continues

Hope Hicks, elusive Trump aide, in the spotlight amid Rob Porter scandal
Hope Hicks is the enigma of the Trump administration.
Hicks is the White House communications director and one of President Trump's closest aides. Yet she has never given a TV interview. She is rarely quoted at all. She is the yin to Trump's attention-grabbing yang.
And right now she's in a terrible place for a press-shy person to be: In the middle of not one but two White House scandals.


At this point, I think we can safely conclude that Hope Hicks has absolutely terrible taste in men.


Trump fired Cory Lewandowski and Rob Porter, both Hope Hick's boyfriends, Does he want Hope for himself? - Eric Elder





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

George W. Bush longs for the time when meddling in elections was done in-house, by Americans, purging the Democratic voter rolls. - Erik Bransteen





Another Trumped Up Nothingburger
FBI officials said the investigation into the November death of a U.S. Border Patrol agent has yielded no evidence that there was a "scuffle, altercation or attack" more than two months after President Donald Trump and others used the suggestion of an attack to promote the building of a wall along the U.S.-Mexico border...Investigators have conducted more than 650 interviews and involved 37 field offices in their probe, but have not found definitive evidence of an attack..The FBI release noted that a dispatcher, who was among the people interviewed by investigators, took the call from the surviving agent. According to the release, the dispatcher wrote in his log that, "(He) thinks they (both agents) ran into a culvert."



I dream of a world where cable news doesn't give ridiculous liars a forum to tell ridiculous lies. - The Hoarse Whisperer tweet





Republican Shenanigans

This morning Trump will attend the National Prayer Breakfast where he will give thanks that Republicans don’t care if he pays off porn stars, defends wife beaters, supports pedophiles or conspires with foreign adversaries. - Tea Pain





Take Your Job And Shove It, Sessions
Attorney General Jeff Sessions this week said that the solution for many people who suffer from chronic pain should be to “take aspirin and tough it out.”


Things John Kelly says....
Wife beater: He's a man of honor and integrity
Immigrants: Too lazy to get up off their asses
Black congresswoman: She's a liar and an empty barrel
Media: Use that sword on the press
Civil War: The lack of an ability to compromise led to the Civil War. - Wil Donnelly






Women Are Going To Save This Country Because They Can Deliver An 8 Hour Speech In High Heels Without Flinching
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi made history on Wednesday by delivering an eight-hour speech in protest of Speaker Paul Ryan’s unwillingness to commit to legislation that would protect "Dreamers."
And Pelosi, 77, a California Democrat, did it all while standing in four-inch heels, to the amazement of admirers on Twitter, and without taking a bathroom break. She broke a 109-year-old House record for longest speech from the floor by nearly three hours.






Nancy Pelosi spoke for 8 hours, Trump couldn’t read a 10 page memo? - Schooley tweet





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Rock The Voter News




I agree, this Clinton scandal where Hillary sold Uranium One to ISIS in Benghazi in order to finance the child sex ring run out of the basement of a pizza parlor that has no basement really needs to be looked into for the fifteen hundredth time. - Jeff Tiedrich


When Cops Rape In 35 States
When Anna said she was raped by two on-duty cops, she thought it would be a simple case. She had no idea she lived in one of 35 states where officers can claim a detainee consented.







The Rob Porter/John Kelly story is one where I genuinely wish I could say to Trump supporters, "Are you okay with this?" And the answer cannot include the names Clinton or Obama.- Mark Harris


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The Mexican-American judge that Donald Trump insulted may hear a case about his border wall. It’s the landmark case of Donald Trump vs. Payback’s a B***h.- Conan O'Brien



Business/Tech News




At some point, the media needs to stop calling whats happening at the White House "scandals" and start calling it crimes.- gettinnoticedmo tweet



Macy's Offering Clothing Choices For Muslim Women
Macy’s will introduce a collection of modest clothing, including hijabs, next week, making it the latest company to try to capture a piece of the lucrative Muslim clothing market.









Donald Trump is like the bus from "Speed" — if he doesn't tell 60 lies an hour he blows up. Fried chicken and cheeseburgers go everywhere.- Jimmy Kimmel







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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
This is not a flat earth post, This is Dunnet Head, Scotland - the most northern point of mainland Britain.

Peace.


Wednesday, February 7, 2018

Trump Wants A YUGE Military Parade


Trump Wants Pentagon To Stage Military Parade Down Pennsylvania Avenue
President Trump, apparently inspired by the Bastille Day parade he witnessed last summer during a trip to Paris, has ordered the Pentagon to look into staging something similar — but naturally bigger and better — for Washington, D.C., the White House confirmed Tuesday.


Everyone in the armed forces should claim they have bone spurs and do the parade riding golf carts. - Patton Oswalt




The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Trump is planning a parade. Someone tell him he can't throw beads off a float and expect women to show their boobs on Pennsylvania Avenue. - Tim Hanlon



Email
Subject: Trump’s Uniform

I know what Trump really wants – a uniform! And it would be the greatest uniform of all time; believe me! He could drape himself in the finest imported (from China) linens with gold braid and stars and much embroidery; plus a red, white, and blue sash; plus all the medals of all the services (as befits their commander) from all the wars.

He could carry a sword like Washington and pearl-handled revolvers like Patton. He could wear mirrored sunglasses like Gaddafi. The gold embroidery on his hat would put MacArthur’s to shame. His hat could even have a plume so that when he put it on he would be taller than Jim Comey.

Then he could declare himself a 7-star – no, make that a 50-star – field marshal, generalissimo, and commander-in-chief. He could ride in a gold carriage drawn by eight white horses. The carriage would have two red buttons, to order either a nuclear strike or a diet Coke. A bevy of beautiful young girls would fan and applaud him, and cater to his every whim.

And then he would be the greatest president there ever was or will be; that I can tell you!

Or he could just get penis enlargement surgery and spare us all the time and expense of this dreadful spectacle.


~Rick

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Thanks Rick. Thank you. Just what I needed... I gagged snorted at the 50 stars!
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I left out the uniform pants, custom-tailored so Paul Ryan could lick his balls during the parade.

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No you didn't.

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It would be nice to help Puerto Rico recover from the hurricane, but that money is badly needed to stage an enormous military parade in DC - Andy Borowitz




FBI Investigating NRA's Ties To Russia
A Russian pro-gun group with ties to the National Rifle Association boasted an “honorary members” list that’s a who’s-who of far-right and nationalist Russian political figures.
The group, The Right To Bear Arms, is run by Alexander Torshin, the Russian central bank official and Putin ally at the center of an FBI investigation into whether the NRA received illegal Russian money to boost Donald Trump in 2016






Republican Shenanigans

Sean Hannity reminds you that the Dow increase was due to Trump's brilliance but the Dow falling was all Obama's fault because...
Never mind.  I was just trying to write a joke but he actually said that. -John Fugelsang


The Chaotic World Of FBI Emails
Two FBI officials who disparaged President Trump in text messages reportedly exchanged other messages in 2016 praising former FBI director James Comey and criticizing Congress...The two officials — FBI agent Peter Strzok and FBI lawyer Lisa Page — in an exchange mocked Congress as "worthless,"Strzok responded: "Less than worthless."
They also offered praise for Comey, referring to him as "brilliant."





MATT LAUER: Welcome back to the Trump Military parade. I'm Matt Lauer with cohost Lana Trump for Trump TV.
LARA TRUMP: Lara.
MATT LAUER: Whatever. Coming down Pennsylvania Ave is the US Army Fife and drum corps with honorary parade delegate Scott Baio.
LARA TRUMP: Love him!
- Jeremy Newberger





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“Sean Hannity has accused me of making the stock market go down,” Obama said. “All I have to say is, ‘Guilty as charged.’ ” - Andy Borowitz


Rock The Voter News





Is Brownie Running FEMA Again?
Two Democrats are calling for the Federal Emergency Management Agency to be subpoenaed for documents relating to Hurricane Maria, suggesting the agency failed to provide tens of millions of meals after the storm devastated Puerto Rico...The company delivered 50,000 of the 30 million meals promised in a contract signed October 3, less than 0.25 percent, according to Tribute Contracting owner Tiffany Brown.





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Business/Tech News

Pence acknowledged that some people in the White House would have to be left behind by Rapture: “Jared, for example.” - Andy Borowitz






Love Love Love Elon Musk. Thanks For The Thrills!
Our sun gained a new satellite, courtesy of SpaceX’s first test launch of its Falcon Heavy rocket: A cherry-red Tesla Roadster once driven by SpaceX and Tesla CEO Elon Musk, blasting tunes from David Bowie’s “Space Oddity” with a spacesuit-clad “Starman” dummy strapped in the driver’s seat. On the dashboard display as Starman hurtled into the darkness, waiting in the sky? “Don’t Panic,” the tagline from Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.


Elon Musk is slowly moving everything he owns to another planet. - DNA DNA tweet





I thought launching a car into space was dumb until I imagined the confused look on the aliens who find it centuries after we die LOL - Jesse McLaren





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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo
Carrie Fisher and her double relaxing between takes during the filming of Star Wars due to the pain caused by those bras.

Peace.


Tuesday, February 6, 2018

White House Chit Chat

The Dow Jones stock index falls more than 1,100 points, or about 4.6%, its largest single-day point decline ever
Stocks went into free fall on Monday, and the Dow plunged almost 1,600 points -- easily the biggest point decline in history during a trading day.
Buyers charged back in and limited the damage, but at the closing bell the Dow was still down 1,175 points, by far its worst closing point decline on record.


Stock market is tired of winning. - Stephen Colbert





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

I didn’t serve 24 years in the uniform of this country to be called treasonous for simply disagreeing with your disastrous policies, Mr. President. - Rep. Tim Walz




The Effects Of Mistreatment By Republicans
A former British intelligence officer provided information to the FBI because it alarmed him. Given the way he’s been treated, future tipsters will be less likely to come forward.


Yes please, nitwits who believed a child sex ring was being run out of the basement of a pizza parlor with no basement, please tell me more about this FBI conspiracy that prevented Trump from becoming president. - Jeff Tiedrich




Republican Shenanigans

Russians are "funneling money... to members of Congress" - Fmr. WH Ethics Chief Richard W. Painter "we've got to take this seriously"









It's OK When A Trump Does It!
Melania Trump could have been deported and banned from the US if Donald Trump had been president when she was working as a model in the 1990s, immigration attorneys have said.









Thinking the President will try to avoid a Mueller interview because of bone spurs.
#itworkedoncebefore - Alan Billingsley






Newsweek Was Raided By The Manhattan District Attorney
Newsweek, once one of the world's premiere newsweeklies covering global politics and economics, is drowning in a sea of its own bad news.
The magazine's offices were raided last month by investigators from the Manhattan District Attorney's office, and its chief content officer stepped down after sex harassment allegations. Now, some of its 60 New York-based employees are voicing fears about their long-term job security.



Deplorables, last week: THE DOW JONES IS UP A MILLION POINTS, LIBTARD
Deplorables, this week: THE DOW JONES DOESN'T MATTER, LIBTARD - Jeff Tiedrich





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Under Pressure from Fox News, Obama to Stop Making Stocks Plummet. - Andy Borowitz


Rock The Voter News





We don't live in a dictatorship or a monarchy. I swore an oath—in the military and in the Senate—to preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States, not to mindlessly cater to the whims of Cadet Bone Spurs and clap when he demands I clap. - Sen. Tammy Duckworth



The FBI's  Investigating The FBI Investigating Hillary
Few people have heard of Michael Horowitz, but that’s about to change....With little fanfare, he has been conducting a sprawling probe of the FBI’s handling of the 2016 investigation into Hillary Clinton’s use of a private email server. His full report, which could set off shockwaves, is expected by the early spring.





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Business/Tech News

Has Trump tried to fire Dow Jones yet? - Sarah Cooper






Screwing Those Who Get Tips
The Department of Labor’s Office of Inspector General announced Monday it will look into the agency's rulemaking process in issuing its proposed tip-pooling rule.






Donald Trump wanted to become America's ruler but wound up becoming America's IQ test. - John Fugelsang





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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

The Blue Canyon is located within the Hopi Reservation in Arizona. Mother Nature made this, not man. Incredible.

Peace.