All Hat No Cattle

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Trump solves all of his problems

Trump spikes the ball after Georgia election win
Rattled by Donald Trump's tumultuous first five months in office, the Republican Party breathed a collective sigh of relief Tuesday after a much-needed special election victory in Georgia.

Secret Service Fun Fact: 3 out of 4 people caught scaling the White House fence are process servers. -Conan O'Brien

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

At this point the White House is nothin' but a bunch of hissin' possums hidin' in your garbage cans. - Tea Pain

Background Checks Have No Meaning To This White House
The head of the CIA continued to brief Michael Flynn on the nation’s most sensitive intelligence information until he was ousted as national security adviser, despite concerns from top government agencies, including the CIA itself, that Flynn was vulnerable to Russian blackmail

Republican Shenanigans

GOP has the White House, the House & the Senate. Any lack of legislation ain't from "Obstruction". More like "Incompetence." - Tea Pain

It's Not Russia That Trump Likes, It's Russian MONEY
A Reuters review found that at least 63 individuals with Russian passports or addresses have bought at least $98.4 million worth of property in seven Trump-branded luxury towers in southern Florida.

Some white folks would vote against air if they heard black folks were getting it for free. - Mat Johnson

If white people were treated the way black people are in America, the Trump campaign would almost make sense. - LOLGOP

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Rock The Voter News

Hunker Down Here Comes Tropical Storm Cindy
From the Florida Panhandle to eastern Texas, residents and government officials along the northern Gulf Coast kept an eye on slow-moving Tropical Storm Cindy, which the National Weather Service said posed a threat of “life-threatening flash flooding....

CONTEST: Win trip to Mar-a-lago by giving a believable account of how Trump was not colluding with Russia. Entries judged by Robert Mueller. - Tea Party Cat

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Business/Tech News

Donald Trump hasn't commented on a white terrorist attacking Muslims in London, but he has taken credit for the Panama Canal. - Rex Huppke

Betsy DeVos Is Turning Student Loans Into Sharecropper Loans
Education Secretary Betsy DeVos's pick to lead the department's $1.3 trillion student loan system is the CEO of a private student loan company.
A. Wayne Johnson, who was tapped as chief operating officer of Federal Student Aid (FSA), is the founder and chief executive of Reunion Financial Services, a company that originates and refinances student loans.

Today in 1989 the U.S. Supreme Court ruled (Texas vs Johnson) American flag-burning was a form of protest protected by the First Amendment

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FUNDRAISER

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Putin Sends Trump A Message In The Air

Russian jet buzzes US plane after Syrian drone downed
A Russian jet came within five feet of a U.S. reconnaissance plane near the Baltic Sea Tuesday after the military announced earlier that day it had shot down another aircraft belonging to the Moscow-backed Syrian government.

Gee, Trump hasn't tweeted about a U.S. plane getting buzzed by a Russian jet. I wonder why?

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

The personal encounter with refugees dispels fears and distorted ideologies and becomes a factor for growth in humanity. - Pope Francis

The Secretary Of State's 3 Point Plan
Secretary of State Rex Tillerson reportedly has a three-point plan to both improve relations and work with Russia, one of which includes facing global threats posed by the Syrian civil war, the proliferation of North Korea’s missile and defense program and a third that could seem strange to some: Cybersecurity and cyber-espionage.

It was odd that the White House banned cameras and audio at yesterday’s press briefing. Usually, they only ban facts. - Stephen Colbert

Republican Shenanigans

Republicans don't care when you point out their hypocrisy. Hypocrisy is baked into their pie. It's a feature, not a bug. - Jeff Tiedrich

Hugs Are Hard!
First Daughter Ivanka Trump went to Capitol Hill on Tuesday to talk about her new child tax credit proposal — and she was greeted by Sen. Marco Rubio (R – FL).

Trump is running a fundraising contest where the winner gets to have dinner with him. James Comey was like, “Trust me, that is not a good prize. Don’t do it.” - Jimmy Fallon

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During a meeting with the president of Panama, President Trump said, “We did a good job building the Panama Canal,” despite the fact that the canal was constructed over a century ago. Mr. President, if you’re going to keep saying stuff this dumb in front of other world leaders, could you at least wear a big bandage on your head? You know, so it seems like there’s a reason. - Seth Myers

AHNC TRIVIA FOR TRUMP

The three paragraph description below is packed with fascinating information from the Dept. of State historian.

Teddy Roosevelt not only built the Panama Canal, he created the country of Panama after a one day standoff with Colombia. President Roosevelt famously stated that "I took the Isthmus, started the canal and then left Congress not to debate the canal, but to debate me."

Building the Panama Canal, 1903–1914

President Theodore Roosevelt oversaw the realization of a long-term United States goal—a trans-isthmian canal. Throughout the 1800s, American and British leaders and businessmen wanted to ship goods quickly and cheaply between the Atlantic and Pacific coasts.

Roosevelt on a digging machine during construction of the
Panama Canal, circa 1908. (Library of Congress,
Prints and Photographs Division)

To that end, in 1850 the United States and Great Britain negotiated the Clayton-Bulwer Treaty to rein in rivalry over a proposed canal through the Central American Republic of Nicaragua. The Anglo-American canal, however, never went beyond the planning stages. French attempts to build a canal through Panama (province of Colombia) advanced further. Led by Ferdinand de Lesseps—the builder of the Suez Canal in Egypt—the French began excavating in 1880. Malaria, yellow fever, and other tropical diseases conspired against the de Lesseps campaign and after 9 years and a loss of approximately 20,000 lives, the French attempt went bankrupt. In spite of such setbacks, American interest in a canal continued unabated. The Hay-Pauncefote Treaty of 1901 abrogated the earlier Clayton-Bulwer Treaty and licensed the United States to build and manage its own canal. Following heated debate over the location of the proposed canal, on June 19, 1902, the U.S. Senate voted in favor of building the canal through Panama. Within 6 months, Secretary of State John Hay signed a treaty with Colombian Foreign Minister Tomás Herrán to build the new canal. The financial terms were unacceptable to Colombia’s congress, and it rejected the offer.

President Roosevelt responded by dispatching U.S. warships to Panama City (on the Pacific) and Colón (on the Atlantic) in support of Panamanian independence. Colombian troops were unable to negotiate the jungles of the Darien Strait and Panama declared independence on November 3, 1903. The newly declared Republic of Panama immediately named Philippe Bunau-Varilla (a French engineer who had been involved in the earlier de Lesseps canal attempt) as Envoy Extraordinary and Minister Plenipotentiary. In his new role, Bunau-Varilla negotiated the Hay-Bunau-Varilla Treaty of 1903, which provided the United States with a 10-mile wide strip of land for the canal, a one-time $10 million payment to Panama, and an annual annuity of $250,000. The United States also agreed to guarantee the independence of Panama. Completed in 1914, the Panama Canal symbolized U.S. technological prowess and economic power. Although U.S. control of the canal eventually became an irritant to U.S.-Panamanian relations, at the time it was heralded as a major foreign policy achievement.

This was a classic example of U.S. gunboat diplomacy in Latin America, and the best illustration of what Roosevelt meant by the old African adage, "Speak softly and carry a big stick [and] you will go far." (Wikipedia)

This can’t be easy for Trump’s lawyers. Like, they’re representing someone who lies even more than they do. And lying is their job. - James Corden

Rock The Voter News

Because Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein was in on talks about firing Comey, he may need to recuse himself from the Russia probe. He would be the third member of this investigation to be gone, after Attorney General Jeff sessions and former FBI Director James Comey. It’s all in the latest season of “Survivor: Justice Department Island.” - Stephen Colbert

Georgia On Our Minds: Vote Your Ossoff
Thousands of voters in the suburbs north of Atlanta grabbed the country's attention Tuesday as a special congressional election neared its end as a referendum on President Trump.

And in a parallel universe, Pres Hillary Clinton sends her son-in-law to Mideast peace talks & Limbaugh actually begins screaming in German. - John Fugelsang

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This weekend, Trump took his first trip to Camp David. He spent the whole weekend walking around, exploring the property and looking for the Wi-Fi password. “I got to tweet! I got to tweet!” - Jimmy Fallon

Business/Tech News

The Supreme Court ruled that a company has the legal right to have an offensive name. In other words, Trump Tower is going to stay Trump Tower. - Conan O'Brien

Boeing 797 Features: Twin Isles!
The world has been given a peek at Boeing's plans for a new small twin-aisle aircraft, unofficially dubbed the 797. Boeing released the first image of its new "middle-market airplane" at the Paris Air Show on Tuesday as a teaser for what will be ...

Dear USA- once you deindustrialize, automate & outsource jobs overseas try not to call Americans who can't find work 'lazy.' - John Fugelsang

Gender specific hairstyles for guys:
Man-bun
Updude
Bronytail
French Brad
Chauvinist pigtails
- OhNoSheTwnt

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FUNDRAISER

Monday, June 19, 2017

Russia "warns" U.S.

Russia warns US after downing of Syrian warplane
Warplanes from the U.S.-led coalition operating over Syrian government-controlled areas west of the Euphrates River will be tracked as potential targets, Russia's Defense Ministry said Monday, a day after the U.S. military shot down a Syrian air force jet.

Someone's going to jail in Russia investigation, but it won't be Trump. - Newt Gingrich

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump

Vladimir Putin has offered asylum to former FBI Director James Comey. When she heard, Melania Trump said, “Hey, what about me?” - Conan O'Brien

More Refugees Than Ever
A new report has found that more people than ever before have become refugees or are internally displaced worldwide because of war, violence, and persecution.

Why Did The Navy Take An Hour To Report The Collision? Didn't They Call For Help?
Japan's coast guard is investigating why it took nearly an hour for a deadly collision between a U.S. Navy destroyer and a container ship to be reported.

Donald Trump tweeted: “They made up a phony collusion with the Russian story, found zero proof, so now they go with obstruction of justice on the phony story. Nice.” Donald Trump is the first president to make regular use of the sarcastic “nice,” isn’t he? You never heard FDR go, “This is a date which will live in infamy. Nice.” - James Corden

There is a suppression of information going on at this WH that would not be tolerated at a city council mtg or press conf with a state gov.- Jim Acosta, CNN

Republican Shenanigans

Trump's attorneys are all workin' "pro bono." They just don't know it yet. - Tea Pain

Republicans Hire Only The Best!
A data analytics contractor employed by the Republican National Committee (RNC) left databases containing information on nearly 200 million potential voters exposed to the internet without security, allowing anyone who knew where to look to download it without a password.
"We take full responsibility for this situation," said the contractor, Deep Root Analytics, in a statement.

So, no one knows about health care bill except the group of white men who crafted it and are keeping it a secret. Great country. Go USA. - Chelsea Handler

Mueller Has So Many Russian Connections To Follow, It'll Be Like Shooting Fish In A Barrel
Then-Trump campaign chair Paul Manafort met with a Ukrainian business associate who previously served in the Russian army last August, as speculation rose about Russian meddling in the U.S. presidential campaign

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GOP Chairman Says The Shooting Will Help In The Election
The Republican Party chairman in Georgia's 11th Congressional District said that the shooting at a congressional baseball practice near Washington, D.C., will result in a GOP win in the state's special House election

Rock The Voter News

The real question is: Why is Donald Trump still tweeting about Hillary? Seriously, Donald Trump is that guy who swears he’s over his ex, but then spends the entire night telling you exactly how over her he is. - James Corden

The Hurricanes Are Coming! The Hurricanes Are Coming! Be Prepared This Season!
Two separate tropical storms are likely to form in Gulf of Mexico and in the Atlantic over the next couple of days, the National Hurricane Center said.

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Business/Tech News

President Trump will speak in Miami. He’ll be comfortable, because he still has strong support in Florida. Plus, he’s the state fruit. - Seth Myers

Elizabeth Warren Goes After Wells Fargo
Elizabeth Warren is so livid with Wells Fargo that she's demanding the government take the dramatic step of throwing out most of the board of directors.

Ikea recently announced that it will be launching a candle collection, because what goes together better than Ikea furniture and an open flame? - Seth Myers

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FUNDRAISER

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Trump solves all of his problems

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Putin Sends Trump A Message In The Air

Monday, June 19, 2017

Russia "warns" U.S.

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