Monday, May 15, 2017

The State of the Union 115 Days After Trump Arrived


Friday morning, Trump issued a thinly veiled threat to Comey, apparently suggesting there are possibly recorded conversations between the ...



I feel as though I am in the setting of a Tom Clancy spy novel with the script written by Elmore Leonard.






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump






[trump literally shoots someone on 5th Avenue]
FOXNEWS: President Trump surprises man with precious metal souvenir.-  @sortabad tweet




The Curious Pattern Of Deaths Around Putin's Critics
Former Director of National Intelligence James Clapper said there is a “curious pattern” of deaths of opponents of Russian President Vladimir Putin who have questioned or challenged his role.














Revenge Will Be Mine: Osama bin Laden's Son
Osama bin Laden's son has vowed revenge on the west for killing his father and is set to become the next leader of al-Qaeda, a former FBI agent has warned.
Ali Soufan, who was the FBI's lead investigator of al-Qaeda after the 9/11 terror attacks, examined documents seized from bin Laden's Pakistan compound when he was killed by US Navy Seals in 2011.





Republican Shenanigans


I think the strategist thing about how all this went down is that Trump fired James Comey by letter. He had a letter delivered to his office at the FBI. He didn’t even say, “You’re fired,” which is his catch phrase! It would be like Arnold Schwarzenegger leaving a party and just going, “See ya.” - Jimmy Kimmel








Democrats Trying To Prevent Document Destruction
Democrats kept up the pressure on Donald Trump over the sudden firing of James Comey, demanding that recordings the president suggested he may have made of his meetings with the former FBI director be preserved and handed over to lawmakers





Everyone is very focused on the Comey firing and whether Trump’s people colluded with the Russians — and all that is important. But I think this is even more important. Because forget everything politically, forget everything you believe for a minute, forget whether you’re a Democrat or Republican. Just clear your mind and ask yourself, what kind of a person thinks he came up with the phrase “priming the pump”? - Jimmy Kimmel







I'm not saying Trump is the anti-Christ, I'm saying Christ is the Anti-Trump. - John Fugelsang






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Trump claims he would have won the popular vote if there hadn’t been voter fraud but there is absolutely no proof of that. We are now just creating commissions to prove Trump’s dumb theories. I can’t wait for the report from the Senate commission on “But No Seriously, Meryl Streep Is Overrated.” - James Corden



Rock The Voter News





We need to accept the fact that Trump's supporters will never abandon him except on the outside chance he suddenly becomes black. - Tea Pain




Is Miss USA A Republican?
The newly crowned Miss USA has ignited a firestorm on Twitter with an answer she gave onstage at the pageant.
Kara McCullough, who was Miss District of Columbia, was asked whether she thought healthcare is a right or a privilege for Americans.
“I’m definitely going to say it’s a privilege,” said McCullough, who also works as a scientist at the U.S. Nuclear Regulatory Commission. She added that Americans shouldn't be forced to pay for other people's healthcare. 




Irregular periods are considered a pre-existing condition. - The Daily Show






US Could Save Time, Money by Impeaching Pence at Same Time. - Andy Borowitz


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Biz/Tech News


Although Trump doesn’t get credit for creating the term “prime the pump,” he has created lots of other things. He has, for example, created Sean Spicer’s ulcers, soaring stock prices for Xanax, and he created — let’s not forget — he created lots of jobs for his kids. -  James Corden









Trump Won't Like This Ruling
A divided U.S. Supreme Court ruled that debt collectors can use bankruptcy proceedings to try to collect liabilities that are so old the statute of limitations has expired.








A company is selling a jacket with a heating mode and a cooling mode. The way it works is, there’s a zipper. - Seth Myers







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Odd News




Time To Deflate Photo

The original Bigfoot, a baby flamingo!

Peace.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

The Russians Arrived! The Russians Arrived!

Acting FBI director vows to inform congressional committee if White House tries to upend Russia probe
Acting FBI director Andrew McCabe vowed Thursday that he would tell the Senate Intelligence Committee if the White House tried to interfere with the bureau's probe of possible coordination between the Kremlin and the Trump campaign to influence the ...



WH furious over Russian government photos of Trump meeting with Lavrov/Kislyak. "They tricked us," an official said of Russians "They lie."  - Jim Acosta, CNN







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump


Former intel officials are worried the Russian photog today could've brought surveillance gear into the Oval Office. - Mark Berman, Washington Post







The Showboat Calls Comey A Showboat
President Donald Trump, in an exclusive interview Thursday with NBC News' Lester Holt, called ousted FBI chief James Comey a "showboat" and revealed he asked Comey whether he was under investigation for alleged ties to Russia.





Trumpcare backlash + Yates testimony + Comey firing + Spicer in bushes + subpoena + Twitter meltdown = time to bomb another empty airfield . - John Fugelsang





Republican Shenanigans


Let's cut the sh*t...Comey got fired cause he was getting closer to Russia than Sarah Palin's house. - Kevin Flood











Spicer Has Meltdown
White House press secretary and former Easter Bunny Sean Spicer has a real tough job sometimes. And on Tuesday night, when President Donald Trump fired FBI director James Comey, it apparently became too much to handle.










Kushner Family Business Nixes U.S. Visa Sales To China
The sister of White House adviser Jared Kushner on Thursday pulled out of the family company’s scheduled weekend presentation to potential Chinese investors amid growing criticism that she had used her brother’s position to benefit the family’s real estate empire.



Maybe it’s me, but Mike Pence has that look you get when you realize the gnat is too far down your throat to spit out. - Conan O'Brien

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Rock The Voter News


The White House announced yesterday that President Trump fired FBI Director James Comey. Yet another long-time dream that Trump stole from Hillary. - Seth Myers



Jimmy Carter Felt The Bern
Former Democratic President Jimmy Carter revealed Monday night that he backed Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders over Hillary Clinton in last year's Democratic presidential primary. "Can y'all see why I voted for him?" the 92-year-old Carter said of Sanders, ..




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Biz/Tech News


Sure, you people with pre-existing conditions might die, but you should still be happy that Trumpcare will let rich people buy a third yacht. - Tea Party Cat








No Laptops For You!
The Trump administration is likely to expand a ban on laptops on commercial aircraft to include some European countries, but is reviewing how to ensure lithium batteries stored in luggage holds do not explode in midair, officials briefed on the matter said on Wednesday.










Right now Trump is basically like a drug dealer who hears the cops at the door and is desperately trying to flush the meth down the toilet. - Andy Borowitz





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Odd News

  • The only odd news today is that I had an encounter with a ceiling fan and injured my hand and forearm. No further details needed other than dumb ass.
  • I am going to the doctor's tomorrow and will return on Monday.





Time To Deflate Photo

Hip-Hop Scene, New York, 1980s. This was when Hip-Hoppers had waists to hold up their pants. Photograph by Jamel Shabazz

Peace.

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Trump Fires FBI Director

Days Before Firing, Comey Asked for More Resources for Russia Inquiry
Days before he was fired, James B. Comey, the former F.B.I. director, asked the Justice Department for a significant increase in resources for the bureau's investigation into Russia's interference in the presidential election, according ...



Putin knew that “there were bound to be some growing pains,” a source close to the Russian President said. “But geez.” - Andy Borowitz








The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam Trump



Have to wonder who at the White House said "let's fire the guy in charge of the Russia probe then invite the Russians to the White House." - John Aravosis‏









In Your Face Whether It Looks Bad Or Not Politics
President Donald Trump hosted Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov and Russian Ambassador to the US Sergey Kislyak at the White House Wednesday amid the swirling investigation of Russian contacts with Trump campaign and transition officials in 2016 and Tuesday's firing of FBI Director James Comey, who was handling the probe.






Trump Desperately Searching Globe for Empty Airfield to Hit with Cruise Missile -- Andy Borowitz


FYI: Fake tweet


Trump Lawyers Up.
President Donald Trump has hired a Washington law firm to send a letter to a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee saying he has no connections to Russia, White House press secretary Sean Spicer said Tuesday.



Poll: Majority of Americans Favor Converting Mar-a-Lago into Prison - Andy Borowitz






Republican Shenanigans


Ruth Bader Ginsburg Calls Trump White House 'Total Sh*t Show' - Andy Borowitz







Irony will occur when Russia causes his impeachment

Uh Oh Subpoenas For Flynn's "Associates"
Federal prosecutors have issued grand jury subpoenas as part of the ongoing probe of Russia’s interference in the 2016 presidential election, according to a new report.
The subpoenas to associates of former national security adviser Michael Flynn are seeking business records...







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France elected a new president. Centrist candidate Emmanuel Macron won the French presidential election, defeating the far-right candidate Marine Le Pen. Macron won by a large margin, easily getting more votes — which, most Americans will be surprised to learn, is how you win most elections in almost all the countries. - James Corden






Rock The Voter News




Ruskies Are In Like Flynn Flynt
Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov on Wednesday laughed off questions about President Donald Trump's...









In Colorado, a high school teacher has been put on leave after her class smashed a President Trump piñata. When he heard this, Trump was especially furious that he had been made into something that brings joy to Mexicans. - Conan O'Brien






My plan involves getting Buzz Aldrin into a room with Trump, then telling Buzz that Trump said the moon landing was faked.- John Fugelsang


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Biz/Tech News

Everyone who thinks Rick Perry is qualified to deal with today's plutonium emergency at Hanford, raise your radioactive right hand. - Jeff Tiedrich




Need A New Roof? 
Installations in the US will begin this year and will be available on a first ordered basis. Tesla opened up orders and announced pricing information for its Solar Roof product on Wednesday.









North Korea reported that there was a U.S.-sponsored plot launched against Kim Jong Un. Apparently two CIA agents tried to sneak up on Kim and give him a man’s haircut. - Conan O'Brien





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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

This must be photoshopped because the tables and pool are empty in beautiful Santorini, Greece.

Peace.