All Hat No Cattle

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

No Republican dare call it treason

House Intel Committee scraps meetings this week
The House Intelligence Committee has scrapped all meetings this week amid growing partisan rancor now threatening to derail its investigation into Russia and the Trump campaign.

Maybe if Hillary had put in an email how awful Trump was, the media would have paid attention. - Jeff Tiedrich

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Even Dick Cheney has called Russia's interference in our election "an act of war." And he sure knows all about those. - George Takei

My My My, Unvetted People Coming And Going At Mar-a-Lago
Democrats just came up with a catchy-sounding bill to force President Donald Trump to cough up a list of visitors to his private clubs.
But there’s just one problem: There are no lists yet.

White House Denies Any Ties to United States - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

It was a tough weekend at the White House. After seven years of saying they were going to replace Obamacare, the Republican healthcare bill failed on Friday. It’s sad, isn’t it? Seven years. The Republicans couldn’t come up with a replacement for Obamacare in seven years. They made four “Fast & Furious” movies in that time. - James Corden

Why Isn't It Illegal For A President To Thwart A Congressional Investigation? Or Is It?
The Trump administration sought to block former acting attorney general Sally Yates from testifying to Congress in the House investigation of links between Russian officials and Donald Trump's presidential campaign,

Donald Trump is only afraid of 2 things - Sally Yates testifying under oath, and a strong wind. - John Fugelsang‏

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Rock The Voter News

It was announced that Canada plans to legalize marijuana by July of next year. It’s exciting for Americans because now they can add weed to the list of drugs they buy in Canada.- Jimmy Fallon

Trump Says He Can't Be Sued
President Trump is seeking to stop a lawsuit filed by a former contestant on “The Apprentice,” arguing a state lawsuit can’t be brought against a sitting president.

"Homosexuality is an abomination and Islam is barbaric!" - the people who made it legal to shoot baby bears and wolves while they're asleep. - OhNoSheTwitnt

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Biz/Tech News

Why is Bernie Madoff the only bankster to end up in prison? Because he stole from the 1% - Jeff Tiedrich

Step Right Up And Buy Your Million Dollar Visa
As members of Congress in Washington debate raising the minimum required to obtain a U.S. immigrant investor visa from $500,000 to $1.35 million, concern about the hike has set off a scramble among wealthy would-be participants in China.

Officials in Colombia are angry at rapper Wiz Khalifa for smoking marijuana at the tomb of Pablo Escobar. The officials said marijuana has no place at this sacred monument to cocaine.- Conan O'Brien

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Let's End This Fundraiser FUNDRAISER!

Monday, March 27, 2017

Republican Strategy

Nunes Met Source On WH Grounds Before Making Trump Surveillance Claims
The Republican chairman of the House Intelligence Committee met a secret source on the White House grounds the day before he went public with hazy, charged allegations that members of Donald Trump's transition team had been picked up by incidental collection of foreign nationals.

Sounds like we need to strap an ankle monitor on Devin Nunes and place him under House Committee arrest.- Tea Pain

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

Last Vegas shooting, Wisconsin shooting, Cincinnati shooting. Soooo... is the Muslim ban going to stop Americans from killing each other? - Alt Fed Employee

Trump Son-In-Law To Testify
Senate investigators plan to question Jared Kushner, President Trump’s son-in-law and a close adviser, as part of their broad inquiry into ties between Trump associates and Russian officials or others linked to the Kremlin, according to administration and congressional officials.

Oh, and Lord? When this all plays out, it would be awfully swell if Jared Kushner & Reince could both testify against each other. Amen. - John Fugelsang

Meanwhile, There's An Escalation of US Troops In Iraq
There are 5,262 U.S. troops authorized to be in Iraq, and another 503 in Syria, officials told Military Times on Sunday. But the numbers have been considerably larger for quite some time as commanders leverage what they call temporary — or "non-enduring" — assignments like this one involving the 82nd Airborne in Mosul.

Russians Furious That Their Tax Money Helped Elect Trump. - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Trump Blames Obama for Not Helping to Repeal Obamacare. - Andy Borowitz

Trump & Ryan To Perform Some Voodoo Economics
After President Donald Trump and Speaker of the House Paul Ryan (R-WI) failed to garner enough support to pass legislation that would repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act (ACA), Trump declared he had moved on to refocus his legislative priorities on tax reform. In light of Trump’s inability to get the Republican-led Congress to vote with him on health care changes, which had been a major campaign promise of virtually every elected GOP official, journalists and experts are beginning to question if Trump is capable of wrangling his caucus to tackle substantive conservative tax reform proposals that have been stagnant for decades.

Trump's Microwave Oven Signs $4 Million Book Deal - Andy Borowitz

Republicans Determined To Nuke Something
A key Democratic senator warned Monday that Neil Gorsuch, President Trump's Supreme Court nominee, is likely to fall short of the votes needed to stave off a Democratic filibuster, potentially ushering in the “nuclear option” from Republicans.

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With all the focus on what a disastrous President Donald J. Trump has been, it's important from time to time to remind people that he is also a sexual predator. This is one of those times. - Andy Borowitz

Rock The Voter News

People complain that American government has become a reality show, but if it actually were a reality show Trump would have been eliminated this week. - Andy Borowitz

The Russians Volunteer Info About The Trumps. Why Is That?
A Russian bank under U.S. economic sanctions over Russia's incursion into Ukraine disclosed on Monday that its executives had met Jared Kushner, President Donald Trump's son-in-law and a top White House adviser, during the 2016 election campaign.

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Biz/Tech News

Hey Donald J. Trump when you say you hope Obamacare explodes, remember that that means a lot of Americans with cancer and other diseases will die. Probably not a good thing for a President to say, even one who lost by three million votes. #youf*cker. - Andy Borowitz

FBI Technology Needs Some Work
Approximately half of adult Americans’ photographs are stored in facial recognition databases that can be accessed by the FBI, without their knowledge or consent, in the hunt for suspected criminals. About 80% of photos in the FBI’s network are non-criminal entries, including pictures from driver’s licenses and passports. The algorithms used to identify matches are inaccurate about 15% of the time, and are more likely to misidentify black people than white people.

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Let's Get This Party Started To End The Fundraiser!

Friday, March 24, 2017

RR = Russian Republicans

RNC paid intel firm for Clinton dirt
As the general election was taking shape last summer, the Republican National Committee initiated a series of payments to a low-profile firm started by retired Central Intelligence Agency officers that worked closely with an ex-Russian spy....RNC officials now acknowledge that most of the cash — $34,100 — went towards intelligence-style reports that sought to prove conflicts of interest between Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton’s tenure as Secretary of State and her family’s foundation.

Trump: "I'm the President and you're not"
Response: "You're under criminal investigation for treason and I'm not." - Tea Pain

The World Is A Safer Place Without ~~Saddam~~ Trump

By 2019, Trump will be sharing a studio apartment in Moscow with Edward Snowden. - Andy Borowitz

Putin Is Cheating On Trump. Oo La La.
Russian President Vladimir Putin stressed the "great importance" of ties between his country and France as he met French far-right presidential candidate Marine Le Pen at the Kremlin on Friday, Russian state-run news agency Tass reported.

The GOP healthcare bill eliminates coverage for both abortion and chemotherapy, thus managing to be pro-life and pro-death at the same time. - Andy Borowitz

Ha Ha. Ryan Chickened Out.
House Speaker Paul Ryan sensationally pulled his Obamacare repeal bill from the floor Friday, a day after President Donald Trump had threatened to walk away from health care reform if he didn't get a vote.

Republican Shenanigans

GOP will need those prostate exams because they pulled #Trumpcare out of their ass. - Seth Meyers

Why, Of Course They Did: Public Hearing Cancelled on Russian Influence In The Election
The House Intelligence Committee chairman and the panel's top Democrat publicly disagreed Friday over the handling of their investigation into Russian meddling into the US election, coming after the announcement that President Donald Trump's campaign chairman agreed to testify before the committee.

Paul Ryan promised you a big bowl of nothing and by God, he delivered. - John Fugelsang

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What a week for the #Resistance! Trump under criminal investigation by the FBI and Obamacare repeal goes down in flames. Booyah! - Tea Pain

Rock The Voter News

Democrats Need A Plan And A Very Visible Leader
Democrats are plotting their next move after questioning House Intelligence Committee Chairman Devin Nunes' fitness to lead the panel's investigation into Russia's involvement in the 2016 election.

Fox News is a foreign-owned political war operation that should be removed from the United States for national security reasons. - Eric Garland

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On Capitol Hill today, one of the most dramatic episodes of “The Celebrity Appresident” yet: Republicans in the House were forced to postpone their vote on healthcare today because they cannot agree on what the plan should be, so it’s back to the drawing board. Unfortunately, Trump’s budget for education cut funding for drawing boards, so there’s no board for them to draw on. - Jimmy Kimmel

Biz/Tech News

"Best thing we can do politically speaking is let Obamacare explode." - Donald Trump today

In May, President Trump is going to give the commencement address at a Christian university. Trump’s speech will be entitled, “If Jesus Is So Great, Why Does He Have a Mexican Name?” -Conan O'Brien

Starbucks And Costa Rica Coffee
Starbucks partners and shareholders, including Lisa Haeg of Puyallup, Washington, took part in a virtual reality tour of the Starbucks Costa Rica coffee farm, Hacienda Alsacia, before the company’s annual meeting of shareholders on March 22, 2017 in Seattle, Washington.

INSTEAD OF THIS SORRY TRAIL OF BROKEN PROMISES AND RUSSIAN CODDLING, WE COULD HAVE HAD OUR FIRST WOMAN POTUS. - Peter Dauo

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Tuesday, March 28, 2017

No Republican dare call it treason

Monday, March 27, 2017

Republican Strategy

Friday, March 24, 2017

RR = Russian Republicans

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