The Immigrants Are Coming!

Trump: Clinton will let 650M immigrants into U.S.
GOP presidential nominee Donald Trump raised eyebrows at a rally Sunday, when he claimed his rival would let 650 million immigrants into the county.


Trump said HRC would let 650 million immigrants into the US in 1 week.     But you've probably already assumed he lies about size.- John Fugelsang

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• Hackers reveal apparent targets of NSA cyber espionage
• Iraqi Forces Nudge Into Mosul as Sectarian, Ethnic Tensions Rise in Northern Iraq
• ISIS World Cup Soccer Plot: Saudi Arabia Game Target Of Thwarted Terrorist Attack
• Dutch Far-Right Politician Boycotts Opening Of His Hate-Speech Trial

This is not so much an election as it is an IQ test.- Andy Borowitz


Harry Reid Plays The Putin/Trump Card
Sen. Harry Reid (D-Nev.) is alleging that the FBI has “explosive information” about a connection between Donald Trump and the Russian government, suggesting that federal investigators have unveiled damning new information about the Republican presidential nominee.

This Sounds Like A Slow Motion Coup. FBI Protects Russia, Not Hillary. WTF?

FBI Director James Comey argued privately that it was too close to Election Day for the United States government to name Russia as meddling in the U.S. election and ultimately ensured that the FBI's name was not on the document that the U.S. government put out, a former FBI official tells CNBC.


Republican Shenanigans

• FBI to review 650,000 emails on Weiner's laptop: report
• Trump said in 2005 that he voted for George W. Bush. In 2009, he claimed he never did
• Deadbeat Donald strikes again — Trump campaign accused of stiffing pollster out of $760K 
• Police union boss sorry for ‘joke’ photo of himself arresting a Hillary Clinton impersonator
• Kellyanne Conway scoffs at Trump child rape case: ‘Next you’re going to ask about his taxes’
• Trump Has 75 Ongoing Legal Battles
• NEW POLL: Trump up 11 on Clinton in Indiana

James Comey: "FBI Investigations reveal that Hillary is a woman who sends email, which is suspicious since all other presidents were men."- Tea Party Cat

Don The Con
Over the course of decades, Donald Trump’s companies have systematically destroyed or hidden thousands of emails, digital records and paper documents demanded in official proceedings, often in defiance of court orders. These tactics—exposed by a Newsweek review of thousands of pages of court filings, judicial orders and affidavits from an array of court cases—have enraged judges, prosecutors, opposing lawyers and the many ordinary citizens entangled in litigation with Trump. 




Rush Limbaugh blamed feminists for street harassment of women. 
He also blames broccoli for what gravy's done to his arteries.- John Fugelsang

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It's 75 degrees in NYC on October 30th so I'm voting for the guy who says that all climate change science is a Chinese hoax.- John Fugelsang

Rock The Voter News

• White House says FBI director not trying to influence election
• Comey may be under investigation for Clinton letter
• Cummings’ shocker: Americans don’t ‘have a clue’ how hard the GOP pushed the FBI to attack Clinton

According to Wikileaks Hillary Clinton secretly supports a single payer health care system.  This is supposed to make us like her less.- John Fugelsang

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We must stand united with our Native American brothers and sisters and say: Stop the Dakota Access Pipeline. Respect Native American rights. - Bernie Sanders


Biz/Tech News

• Oil dips on OPEC output-cut concerns, stocks shaky
• OPEC Head Says Oil Producers On Course to Clinch Supply Deal
• Facebook Check-In at Standing Rock
• Planet at its hottest in 115,000 years thanks to climate change, experts say

I guess I understand wanting to give Russia the benefit of the doubt. Imagine feeling the same way about a former Secretary of State.- LOLGOP


Well, The FBI Affected The Stock Market
The dollar steadied but stock markets remained wobbly on Monday after news the FBI was investigating more emails linked to Hillary Clinton's use of a private server while she was secretary of state.

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Odd News

• Christ's Burial Place Exposed for First Time in Centuries
• Britain's new pound coin won't fit into vending machines
• This sports car enthusiast in Kosovo couldn't afford a Lamborghini. So he built one. 
• Massachusetts police say woman used a baby stroller to cart away stolen items
• Ohio man accused of dumping manure at county Democratic HQ

Time To Deflate Photo

AHNC viewer, Andie sent in this photo of her horse Scotty all dressed up for Halloween. Photo by Sue Sifton. :) Happy Halloween all, be safe!

Peace.

What, did George Zimmerman's jury make an appearance in Oregon?

Juror explains Bundy acquittals: Arrogant prosecutors failed to prove armed takeover was conspiracy
One of the jurors who acquitted seven armed militants who took over an Oregon nature preserve said they were aware their verdict might embolden other anti-government activists — but he said that didn’t matter.

See, kids, a peaceful black protester is called a thug and the collective noun for a group of violent armed white men is called a militia. - OhNoSheTwitnt Tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• Military expert mocks Trump’s offer to "teach him a few things": I can't wait 
• Sanders Calls on President to Intervene in Dakota Access Pipeline Dispute
• Mass arrest as North Dakota police and pipeline protesters clash
• Two arrested after trying to bring loaded guns into Walt Disney World in Orlando 

"Cancel the election & give it to me."
"Throw my opponent in jail."
Trump isn't friends with Vladimir Putin, he IS Vladimir Putin. - Erik Bransteen


War On Transgender Bathrooms
The Supreme Court has agreed to hear a case challenging a Virginia school’s refusal to let a transgender student use the boys’ bathroom.

Trump calls a mic in the Access Hollywood bus "illegal" while he quotes emails stolen by the Russian government to influence our elections. - Tea Pain Tweet


Republican Shenanigans

• Professor who correctly predicted every election since 1984 says Trump will win
• GOP Rep. Chris Stewart says he'll vote for Trump despite comparing him to Mussolini
• CNN’s Chris Cuomo refuses to let Joe Walsh off the hook for ‘musket’ talk: ‘Words matter’
• The internet rejects Mark Kirk’s apology for racist remark about Tammy Duckworth
• Morning Joe downplays violent talk: ‘Stop insulting Trump supporters — there’s rage on both sides’
• "Shark Tank" star: Trump rated my breasts during a business meeting 
• Trump calls one of his own black supporters a ‘thug’ and tosses him out of rally
• The host of the NRA's new pro-Trump show says we should blame minorities for gun violence

Can you imagine what comments about Trump exist in his staffers' and surrogates' emails? - Josh Barro

Trump Won't Pour Money Into A Bad Investment
Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump on Friday gave his campaign $10 million, according to reports, shortly after announcing he would do so but demurring on whether he would live up to his promise to spend $100 million of his own money on the election.



Trump supporters: Death penalty and war are great, and I believe everyone deserves easy access to assault weapons... But abortion is murder.- Tim Hess

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No Words Needed.

HILLARY EMAIL UPDATE: Ewww, Anthony Weiner's Emails?
Federal law enforcement officials said Friday that the new emails uncovered in the closed investigation into Hillary Clinton’s use of a private email server were discovered after the F.B.I. seized electronic devices belonging to Huma Abedin, a top aide to Mrs. Clinton, and her husband, Anthony Weiner.

Friday Dump On Trump
Donald Trump just can’t help himself when it comes to publicly humiliating Miss Universe winners.
The Huffington Post has posted a new video showing Trump telling an audience of how he planned to humiliate former Miss Universe winner Jennifer Hawkins after he thought she had slighted him.









Rock The Voter News

• Obama more popular than Reagan was before he left office
• Hillary Clinton apparently wants Joe Biden to stick around as Secretary of State
• National poll: Clinton plummets 8 points in one week
• Conservative group sues FBI for records on Clinton email investigation
• FBI Director James Comey under fire from Democrats and Republicans after Clinton email announcement

So James Comey doesn’t know the timing or significance of his vague review? Bet he knows the significance of the timing of his vague letter!-Mrs. Betty Bowers

The Neverending Email Investigation That Will End In The Year 2255
The FBI is telling Congress it is investigating whether new emails that may contain classified information have emerged in its probe of Hillary Clinton’s private server. The FBI said in July its investigation was finished.




It's bad enough having the media do the "raises questions," substance-free innuendo thing. Worse when the FBI director does it. Disgraceful. - Paul Krugman

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This election! I mean...what the living f@&k!! Forget "West Wing". "House Of Cards" seems subtle and authentic compared to this sh@t show.- Rob Lowe


Biz/Tech News

• Oil Prices Sag on Concerns About OPEC Deal on Output Cut
• Stocks slide after FBI says it's probing new Clinton emails
• US Economy Roars Back, Grew 2.9% in Third Quarter

Is Trump Embracing Obama's Shovel Ready Jobs?
Donald Trump's economic advisers have embraced a modified version of a theory some liberal economists have been pushing for years: that at a time of very low interest rates, increased federal spending on roads and bridges would actually pay for itself.

It was announced that Shaquille O’Neal is now the owner of a Krispy Kreme Doughnuts franchise in downtown Atlanta. They serve all kinds of doughnuts, or as Shaq calls them, “frosted Cheerios.”- Jimmy Fallon

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Odd News

• Mysterious Star Pulses May Be Alien Signals, Study Claims
• Ukrainian man renames himself iPhone 7 to win the phone
• Police: Texas woman rams squad car while taking topless selfie
• Philippine leader Duterte says God told him to stop cursing
• Prof gives free pass to student who ditched class for Series

Time To Deflate Photo

Happy 130th birthday to Lady Liberty! On this day in 1886, the Statue of Liberty was officially dedicated, becoming a universal symbol of freedom and democracy. In 1924, it was designated as a Statue of Liberty National Monument. 305 feet above the ground, her torch has been a shining beacon on our greatest days and our darkest nights. Photo courtesy of Michael Bissel.

Peace.

Unleashing A Twitter War?

James O’Keefe hypes up ‘literal revolt’ of infuriated internet users if Trump loses
Right-wing video ambush artist James O’Keefe predicts that there will be a “revolt” if Donald Trump ends up losing the election — but it won’t be the kind that involves pitchforks and torches.


Trump supporters say they'll resort to "torches & pitchforks" if they lose. That's the highest level of technology they're comfortable with. - Tea Pain

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• Putin rejects claims of Russian interference in US election
• U.S. 'rocket city' hits Islamic State targets in Mosul
• NATO seeks to manage Russia's new military deployments
• Donald Trump Says He'll Teach Military Expert 'a Couple of Things' About Mosul

"Julian Assange, he openly works with [Russia]. It’s not a secret." — Nadya Tolokonnikova


Poles Are Nervous About Russia
Poland scrapped compulsory military service in 2008. Less than a decade later, some now question the wisdom of that move.
Russia is throwing its weight around eastern Europe, stocking up its isolated Baltic exclave of Kaliningrad with far more armaments than its neighbor feels comfortable with.

Donald Trump today criticized some of his Republican primary opponents for refusing to endorse him, saying, quote, “I don’t know how they live with themselves.” Said his opponents, “We don’t. We live with our wives.”-Seth Myers


Republican Shenanigans

• Ex-Miss Finland: Trump groped me
• You’ll be amazed at how much cash Christie has given to Trump
• Lou Dobbs is convinced Mormons are involved in a massive globalist conspiracy to take down Donald Trump
• Sean Hannity offers to fly Obama to Kenya — and that's not even the craziest part
• Governor Uses Emergency Order to Bring Out-of-State Police to Dakota Access Pipeline Protest
• Clarence Thomas offered Republicans in Congress a lesson on civility

"This is a guy who is, what, on his third marriage, cheated on his first two wives, and was having an affair while he was impeaching Bill Clinton." - Anderson Cooper commenting on Newt Gingrich

Yep, They're Will Be Lots Of Lock And Loading Going On
Only 35 percent of those who support Donald Trump say will most likely accept the election results if Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton wins the White House, according to a new AP-Gfk poll.




Donald Trump’s running mate, Mike Pence, threw a baseball to reporters today with a note saying that he’s rooting for the Cubs. And then the reporters turned the ball over and the other side said, “Help!”- Jimmy Fallon

Analysts are speculating that communication between Donald Trump and his campaign manager, Kellyanne Conway, has become practically nonexistent. They say if she spoke to Trump any less, they’d be married.- Conan O'Brien

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With all the talk of populism this year, I'm starting a new movement: elitism. It's based on a simple premise: I want to elect a President who's smarter than I am.- Andy Borowitz

Jill Stein & Her Investments
Jill Stein is heavily invested in the industries she attacks on the campaign trail, including Big Pharma, defense contractors and oil companies.








From the Yale Record (America's oldest college humor magazine)

Rock The Voter News

•  Clinton opens 4-point lead over Trump in Florida
• Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama hit campaign trail together for the first time
• WIKILEAKS CLINTON EMAILS ARE A DAMP SQUIB

Michelle Obama makes me even prouder to be an American than Donald Trump makes me ashamed of being one. - OhNoSheTwitnt

DNC Goes After Trump In Court
The Democratic National Committee on Wednesday asked a U.S. judge to hold the Republican National Committee in contempt of court over allegations that Donald Trump encouraged his supporters to intimidate minority voters.




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The government just announced that next year [Obamacare] premiums are going up by 25 percent. I haven’t seen Obama hike something so high since he stopped wearing mom jeans.- Stephen Colbert


Biz/Tech News

• Oil up over $50, US inventory drop balances OPEC doubts
• Guess What Uber's Promising Now: Flying Cars
• Media companies want US to force AT&T-Time Warner to share customer data
• UPS Gives Boeing Jumbo a Boost
• Dozens Charged With Scamming 15000 Victims Through Fake IRS Calls
• Study: Marijuana has $2.4 billion impact on Colorado

So, Russia Didn't Hack US Sites Last Week? Who Then?
The giant cyber attack that paralyzed many US sites last week was likely not the work of a foreign country, the top US intelligence chief said...





The Vatican has issued new guidelines on cremation, saying Catholics must bury the ashes in a cemetery. Which is too bad, because I wanted my ashes to be a secret ingredient on the show “Chopped.”- Conan O'Brien

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I hope you all had a good time today!

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Odd News

• Lawsuit: New Mexico sheriff challenged mayor to fist fight
• Waiter at the British Museum knocked off the thumb of a priceless Roman statue
• What the elk is that? Animal in SC for 1st time in centuries
• Woman buys scratch off to teach her husband a lesson... but ends up winning $1 million
• Document: Dog tuxedo bought with Arkansas county credit card

Time To Deflate Photo

Crystals in a pool - Imgur Nettlebed Cave is a limestone cave located in the Mount Arthur region of the northwest South Island of New Zealand. I assume no swimming is allowed.

Peace.