All Hat No Cattle

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Trump Appears On Dr. Oz

Donald Trump Says Campaigning Is 'a Form of Exercise' on 'Dr. Oz'
Donald Trump talked about his medical history on "The Dr. Oz Show" and said of campaigning, "In its own way, it's a pretty healthy act." Trump ...

Trump went to Oz & walked away without a brain, a heart or courage. - John Fugelsang

I retweeted Cher.

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

More Leaked Emails
Condoleezza Rice reportedly criticized former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld in an email to Colin Powell for his handling of the war in Iraq...

Think of the awful things we know about Donald Trump. Now, think about what he doesn't want us to know. - LOLGOP

Uh, let me guess -- the media?

Trump Says He Gets Daily Exercise by Changing Positions. - Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

Today Republican candidate Donald Trump decided to clear the air and reveal the results of a recent physical, on “The Dr. Oz Show.” Which is an interesting move. Like for Donald Trump, you know, sure, Dr. Oz is a respected doctor — you know, in the same way that Dr. Dre is a respected doctor.- James Corden

Click graphic for larger image

IMHO: Trump's Russian Ties Are Going To Bring Him Down
On April 16, 2013, federal agents burst into a swanky apartment at Trump Tower in New York City as part of a larger raid that rounded up 29 suspected members of two global gambling rings with operations allegedly overseen by an alleged Russian mob boss named Alimzhan Tokhtakhounov. The Russian was not nabbed by US law enforcement. Since being indicted in the United States a decade earlier for allegedly rigging an ice skating competition at the 2002 Olympics, he had been living in Russia, beyond the reach of Western authorities. And this new gambling indictment did not appear to inconvenience Tokhtakhounov. Seven months after the bust, he was a VIP attendee at Donald Trump's Miss Universe 2013 contest held in Moscow. In fact, Tokhtakhounov hit the red carpet within minutes of Trump. An alleged crime lord who was a fugitive from American justice was apparently a celebrity guest at Trump's event.

The bad news for Donald Trump is that narcissistic personality disorder cannot be cleared up with antibiotics. - Andy Borowitz

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Judge Defines Discrimination To GOP Lawyers
Attorneys defending Indiana Gov. Mike Pence's order to bar agencies from helping Syrian refugees resettle in his state faced unusually fierce questioning before a federal appeals court Wednesday, suggesting the panel might side with a lower court that found the order discriminatory.

Do that thing where you're not a dick. - Jesus (translated) - John Fugelsang

Rock The Voter News

Watch President Obama and Anthony Bourdain Slurp Noodles in Vietnam
Barack Obama says Trump foundation took other people's money, bought a six-foot-tall painting
Federal lawsuit alleges Georgia blocked thousands of minorities from voter rolls

Up In $moke
No need to shed a tear over John Boehner's departure from politics. He may never have to pay for another cigarette again.

Hillary Clinton Has Brain Pneumonia, Trump Demands To Be Sworn In Immediately . - Wonkette

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The upcoming movie about President Barack Obama’s college years reportedly shows a young Obama shirtless, smoking cigarettes and smoking weed. Or as the president calls him: 2017 Obama.- Jimmy Fallon

Biz/Tech News

Hey, remember when those "illegals" outsourced your job, crashed the housing market & cut taxes for the rich? Vote for a white billionaire. - John Fugelsang

I love the little people, they make my house pretty.

Only Little People Pay Taxes - Leona Helmsley (a nemesis and female version of Trump)
Donald Trump Jr. on Wednesday defended his father's decision not to release his tax returns, saying scrutiny of the documents would distract from Donald Trump's campaign message.

Wal-Mart is working on a self-driving shopping cart that would return itself to the store after you’re done using it. Though the minute that Wal-Mart shopping cart becomes self-aware, it’s going to drive itself to Target and never look back.- Jimmy Fallon

In 10 years I'm opening up a tattoo removal parlor called 'Mom, What's That?' - John Fugelsang

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Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Update

Hillary is not going to die.

That being said, I feel an urge to stuff and mount multiple "news" outlet anchors/"reporters" and hang them in the Journalism Hall of Shame.

Mea Culpa. Mea Maxima Culpa for being offline today.

I have been offline since 8am. At that time I toted my friend Yerlin to a local clinic in Playa Brasilito to tend to her damaged thumb, at my insistence. I dropped her at the clinic and went to visit my friend Yvonne nearby.

Yvonne is a retired nurse, her knowledge of medicine extends from Switzerland, the Vietnam War, North Africa and eventually the USA. She is from the school of Been There, Done That. She saw a photo of Yerlin's thumb on Facebook, looked at me and said she may have to have part of her thumb amputated. My heart and my head totally agreed. Thank you Yvonne.

Within minutes, Yerlin called me to say the clinic doctor would not be in today but the medical assistant cleaned her wound. OK I have had enough.

I picked Yerlin up and we went to a private clinic in Santa Cruz. She saw a doctor, was fully checked out and given new medications. Only time will tell.

Thank you AllHatNoCattlers because a bit of the birthday money you sent me paid for Yerlin's doctor visit...and it was only 25,000 colones or less than $50 US dollars!

Yerlin's infection is very curious to us. How did she get it? At first Yerlin thought she picked up the infection from cleaning a wound on her dog BUT Yvonne disagreed and felt the type of infection she saw was more likely due to her work. Yerlin is the chef at a local restaurant and Yvonne felt she may have gotten the infection from some food item she handled at work.

Soooooooooo...that was my day.

Thank you Yvonne, Facebook and you, my viewers.

I'll be here tomorrow.

Peace, I hope.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

While Hillary is recovering...

Anchor Mistakenly Announces Death of Hillary Clinton
On Sunday, Hillary Clinton had very public bout of illness. Her supporters and detractors were equally invested in her health and finding out ..

As fascinating as the pneumonia story is, it would be great if the media also covered the story of the disturbed man with narcissistic personality disorder trying to get his hands on the country's nuclear launch codes.- Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

"Donald Trump says stuff every day that used to be considered as disqualifying for being president." - President Barack Obama

Do You Think A Trump Supporter Set This Muslim Woman On Fire?
Police in New York City are searching for an assailant who set a Muslim woman on fire Saturday night, just hours before 15th anniversary memorial services for victims of the 9/11 attack began...

Will The DOJ Investigate The DON?
The Department of Justice (DOJ) should investigate bribery allegations against Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump, Democrats charged Tuesday in a letter to the attorney general.

I like seeing guys who once called Bill Clinton "un-American" for avoiding Vietnam ask Mr. Trump how high they should jump. - John Fugelsang

Republican Shenanigans

I hear Hillary's health was so bad she authorized selling weapons to Iran then forgot about it. Oh wait that wasn't her. - John Fugelsang

Ohio University Wiped Clean Of Roger Ailes
Ohio University is wiping Roger Ailes’ name from its campus newsroom.
Amid growing pressure from student groups on campus, Ohio University president Roderick McDavis announced Monday that the school would be making some imminent changes to its newsroom.

NCAA Just Said No To NC
The North Carolina GOP blasted a decision by the NCAA on Monday to pull seven 2016-17 championship events from the state due to a law that prohibits transgender individuals from using public bathrooms that align with their gender identity.

Trump needs to explain why Obama's birth certificate was more important for voters to see than his tax returns. - LOLGOP

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Rock The Voter News

I Hope Hillary Gives Them Pneumonia
Republicans furious with the FBI for not recommending criminal charges against Hillary Clinton over her use of a private email server are scheduled to question Obama administration officials at the second in a series of hearings targeting the Democratic presidential nominee.

"You can take away these Donald Trump ratings when you pry them from our cold dead hands" - your media - John Fugelsang

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Biz/Tech News

Trump needs to answer some basic questions. How much do you want to cut your taxes? Is the president a citizen? Do you sleep in those suits? - LOLGOP

Editor note: This isn't true.

Legal Experts School GOP Texan
In a Monday letter to Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX), climate change denier and chair of the House Science Committee, several constitutional experts argued that the committee should not have issued subpoenas to environmental groups as part of its probe into state investigations of Exxon.