Tuesday, August 30, 2016

One Is A Weiner And The Other Is A Dick

Donald Trump Called 'Amnesty Don' on MSNBC's 'Morning Joe'
Donald Trump has dished out quite a few hard-hitting nicknames during his campaign, but how will he react now that one's been pinned on him?


Trump accuses Anthony Weiner of possibly leakin' classified information.  Turns out it was nothin' we hadn't seen already. - Tea Pain






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

The Quarterback Who Stayed Seated
Colin Kaepernick has America's attention: so what does he do now?
It’s one thing to spark debate by refusing to stand for the anthem. But the quarterback now has to take meaningful action if he is to fight injustice





Anthony Weiner would still be in The House if he'd just had an actual affair w/a mistress like a normal congressman. - John Fugelsang


Trump Is Profiting From His Own Campaign
In his hostile takeover of the Republican presidential primary, Donald Trump, novice politician, defied virtually every rule in the GOP handbook. But some question whether the billionaire developer, whose business savvy is his chief political asset, is making money by running for the White House – and breaking some big campaign finance rules along the way.




Turns all those things you thought would ruin your career were just qualifications to help run the Trump campaign. - LOLGOP


Republican Shenanigans


If Anthony Weiner had successfully cheated on his wife many times, Republicans would have punished him by making their nominee for president. - LOLGOP






Red States: Are They The GOP Talking Point Of Freeloaders?
States that voted against President Obama twice are more dependent on the federal government, according to an analysis of new data released by the Pew Charitable Trusts on Monday.
All told, the average state that voted against Obama twice relied on federal funding for an average of 33.8 percent of its budget, the report found.




Leaked Medical Records Reveal Trump is Gradually Turning into Carrot. - Andy Borowitz





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This election will prove, once and for all, that Republicans can run a putrid ham sandwich and get 40 percent of the vote.- Tina Dupuy





Rock The Voter News

“The estimated cost of a border wall with Mexico is five billion dollars,” a wall advocate said. “We could easily blow the same amount of money on infrastructure repairs and have nothing to show for it but functioning highways.” - Andy Borowitz





"Anthony Weiner is a sexual deviant!" say supporters of an adulterer who said he'd date his own daughter. - OhNoSheTwitnt

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Penny Pinching Pence?
Mike Pence was a young lawyer on the rise, challenging a longtime Democratic congressman in a Republican-leaning Indiana district.
And then, scandal.
Campaign finance records from the 1990 effort showed that Pence, then 31, had been using political donations to pay the mortgage on his house, his personal credit card bill, groceries, golf tournament fees and car payments for his wife.


News that Pence had vanished touched off a panic in Indiana, where residents feared that he might return to resume his political career.- Andy Borowitz






Biz/Tech News





The FBI is investigating whether Russian intelligence agencies have hacked the computers at The New York Times, or as the Times reported it, "Putin named world's sexiest leader."- Stephen Colbert



New Airfare Option
Dreaming of a vacation, but don't have the cash for the airfare? You can now pay for your plane tickets in monthly installments.










Gene Wilder - One of the truly great talents of our time. He blessed every film we did with his magic & he blessed me with his friendship. - Mel Brooks



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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

The Athabasca Glacier is one of the six principal 'toes' of the Columbia Icefield, located in the Canadian Rockies.

Peace.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Shame On Anthony Weiner!

Huma Abedin To Separate From Anthony Weiner After New Sexting 
Top Hillary Clinton aide Huma Abedin is separating from her husband, former New York Rep. Anthony Weiner, according to a statement ...


I imagine child protective services will visit Mr. Weiner, if he hasn't left the country,


Anthony Weiner has hit rock bottom so hard, so many times, he's legally fracking.- John Fugelsang





The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

Remember that time I created the whole universe just so I could focus on one small tribe in the Middle East? Haha. I was on a lot of drugs.- TheGoodGodAbove Tweet






Iraq Carnage Continues
Attackers armed with suicide vests, rifles and grenades killed 18 people in the Iraqi oasis town of Ain al-Tamer, many of them guests at a wedding party, officials said Monday.


The FBI is investigating whether Russian intelligence agencies have hacked the computers at The New York Times, or as the Times reported it, "Putin named world's sexiest leader."- Stephen Colbert





Republican Shenanigans

Trying to use Anthony Weiner behavior to smear women is creepier behavior than Anthony Weiner behavior. - John Fugelsang








Dirty Old Republican
Chelsea Clinton allegedly once had to endure advances from the late former Sen. Strom Thurmond (R-S.C.) while seated next to him at a lunch when she was a teenager.







Can Anthony Weiner please send a dick pic to our crumbling public school system so the media will cover it?- John Fugelsang




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Anthony Weiner is a terrible husband who publicly humiliated his own wife, say fans of Donald Trump. - John Fugelsang





Rock The Voter News

Hiring someone who has a philandering husband is bad judgement, says philandering husband.- LOLGOP






Two State's Election Systems Hacked
Hackers have breached databases for election systems in Illinois and Arizona, according to state election and law enforcement officials.





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Biz/Tech News





Is Mylan Seeing The Light?
Drugmaker Mylan (MYL) said Monday that it will offer a generic version of the life-saving allergy treatment EpiPen for half the list price of the brand-name treatment after it became the center of a national controversy over skyrocketing drug prices.


There's no border wall Donald Trump can build that's big enough to hide the giant 'Help Wanted' sign white people keep putting up.- John Fugelsang







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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

It is a different perspective!

Peace.

Friday, August 26, 2016

Trump Flip Flops and their effects

Donald Trump Spoils Ann Coulter's 'In Trump We Trust' Book Launch
Ann Coulter was trying to celebrate her new book, “In Trump We Trust,” the same night Donald Trump softened his immigration policies —-...


Okay, we found the easiest job on Earth: Working in a white nationalist think tank. - LOLGOP






The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

Obama plans to take nuclear codes with him when he leaves office. - Andy Borowitz





Canadian Crossbow Murderer?
Toronto police are investigating a suspicious package linked to the deaths of three people by crossbow on Thursday. The assailant used bolts, a shorter and thicker version of an arrow, police spokesman Officer David Hopkinson said.


Trump's Medical Report Says He Has Mind of Person 65 Years Younger. - Andy Borowitz







Republican Shenanigans

A new report has found that Donald Trump may have used some of his campaign funds to buy thousands of copies of his own book. Oh my God, that’s what he’s gonna use to build the wall!- Seth Myers




Political Spin: The Good, The Bad And The Lame
Eric Trump said one of the reasons his father decided to run for president was because the White House renamed its Christmas tree to "holiday tree."
However, the tree that's placed on the White House lawn every holiday season is still called the National Christmas Tree.


I heard it was an All Holidays Matter tree. - LOLGOP

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The mastermind behind the complex plot to whitewash Benghazi is too feeble and brain-damaged to be President, the GOP charged. - Andy Borowitz


Rock The Voter News




A new poll released today shows Hillary Clinton is 9 points ahead of Donald Trump in New Mexico. And 100 points ahead in Old Mexico. - Seth Myers


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Mylan Is Literally Sticking It To Its Customers
Pharmaceutical heavyweight Mylan, the latest poster child for drug-industry greed, finally stuck up for itself Thursday. It argued that “the system,” not avarice, was to blame for the company jacking up the price of EpiPens...







Biz/Tech News


To avoid bein' deported, immigrants have learned the safest place to hide is in Donald Trump's tax returns. - Tea Pain






Family Feud?
A U.S. senator whose daughter is the CEO of Mylan Pharmaceuticals has weighed in on the onslaught of criticism over the company’s pricing of its popular EpiPen, even as Mylan today promised to expand a discount program for the anti-allergy medication.



After lying to Rio police, Ryan Lochte has been summoned to Rio to testify. In accordance with the Brazilian Constitution, he has the right to a fair and Speedo trial. - Conan O'Brien
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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

A baby Platypus. Because.

Peace.