Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Trump refuses to support Paul Ryan, John McCain in upcoming Republican primaries

Trump refuses to support Paul Ryan, John McCain in upcoming Republican primaries
Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump is refusing to back House Speaker Paul D. Ryan in his upcoming primary election, saying in an interview Tuesday that he is “not quite there yet” in endorsing his party's top-ranking elected official.


“When that 3 A.M. call comes in, and Mr. Trump is busy on Twitter, Dr. Carson and Governor Palin will be there," Trump's spokesperson said. - Andy Borowitz







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam


Poll: Majority of Americans Support Military Service for Trump. - Andy Borowitz




More Benghazi Deaths
A suicide car bomb attack in the eastern city of Benghazi targeting Libyan troops killed 23 people and wounded dozens of others Tuesday, a hospital official said.








In fairness, Trump's children have all made the enormous sacrifice of having him as a father. - Andy Borowitz



Republican Shenanigans






Trump says Hillary's "weak" and "incompetent", then accuses her of riggin' an entire 50-state electoral system. - Tea Pain



Trump Calls Polls Phony
Trump fires back after Obama criticism cast doubt on general election polls that show him trailing Hillary Clinton, calling those polls "phony." 






BREAKING: Trump Has Only One Hundred Days to Alienate Remaining Voters. - Andy Borowitz

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If Trump doesn't want to compete with a crying baby, he should imagine how Hillary Clinton feels.- LOLGOP



Zika Funding Update
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) on Tuesday doled out $16 million in new grants to help local health officials keep track of birth defects caused by the Zika virus.
The Obama administration has now spent about $201 million out of the $374 million it repurposed in April to fight Zika — leaving about half of its funding still available.






Rock The Voter News

Can't think of a convention that was more successful in bringing out the best in its nominee and the worst in her opponent. - LOLGOP






Pope Francis Reaches Out To Women. 
Pope Francis has created a commission to study the historical role of female deacons in the Catholic Church, the Vatican's press office said.
The commission was initially promised by the Pope after a meeting with a group of nuns on May 12.


I have become a single-issue voter in 2016 and that issue is preventing the total destruction of human civilization.- Andy Borowitz





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Is Donald Crazy? Hell, Yeah!
Donald Trump’s recent ‘erratic behavior’ has medical professionals questioning his mental health.





Biz/Tech News


Isn't the real story that despite a terrible media that's trying to normalize a bigot, Trump is still losing? - LOLGOP








Trump Tells 'Mericans To Avoid Stocks And 401Ks!
Donald Trump suggested Tuesday that Americans should not place their retirement funds into the stock market, warning of “some very scary scenarios.”
In a phone interview with Fox Business, the GOP presidential nominee said that he isn’t a big investor in the stock market, and advised Americans to steer clear of the market as well when considering where to put their 401(k) funds.




A new study finds that Americans have on average become several inches shorter in the past 100 years. But scientists say it's mainly because we're all looking down at our phones.- Jimmy Fallon





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PLEASE HELP KEEP AHNC ONLINE!

      Please,  please,  the  bills  are  due.





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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo
I was hungry when I built this page and saw this photo. Yum!

Peace.

Monday, August 1, 2016

A First: Courtesy of Mrs. Trump

New York Post uses nude photo of Melania Trump on cover
The cover of the New York Post showed potential first lady Melania Trump “like you've never seen her before.”
The Sunday cover used a nude photo of Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump’s wife, which was shot in 1995 for a French men’s magazine.


I'd feel more empathy for Melania Trump if she wasn't married to Donald Trump. 







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam


Now that he's trolling bereaved military families, is Trump going to officially join the Westboro Baptist Church?- Andy Borowitz







WikiLeaks Is Dripping Info Slowly For Maximum Effect
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange won’t say whether Russia had any involvement in the emails his organization released on the eve of last week’s Democratic National Convention. But he says there are more leaks coming.








"I've made a lot of sacrifices," Trump said. "I made gigantic sacrifices to avoid serving my country."- Andy Borowitz



Republican Shenanigans





Thank the media for tasteful headlines like "Trump Gives Questionable Explanation of Events in Ukraine" over "Horrifically F--king Ignorant" - John Fugelsang




I'll Give This To Trump, He Has Chutzpah 
Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump's campaign appealed to Capitol Hill for support on Monday as his attacks on the Muslim parents of a decorated U.S. soldier killed in Iraq drew sharp rebukes from fellow party members.









Make Americans Who Used To Respect The Military Believe Insulting Gold Star Families Is Somehow Great Again.- John Fugelsang



16 Years Ago, William F. Buckley Wrote This About Donald Trump And It’s Eerily Accurate
Look for the narcissist. The most obvious target in today’s lineup is, of course, Donald Trump. When he looks at a glass, he is mesmerized by its reflection. If Donald Trump were shaped a little differently, he would compete for Miss America. But whatever the depths of self-enchantment, the demagogue has to say something. So what does Trump say? That he is a successful businessman and that that is what America needs in the Oval Office. There is some plausibility in this, though not much. The greatest deeds of American Presidents — midwifing the new republic; freeing the slaves; harnessing the energies and vision needed to win the Cold War — had little to do with a bottom line.






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Rock The Voter News


BREAKING: FBI discovers that Hillary’s 30,000 deleted emails were all Facebook notifications from Biden tagging her on cat videos.- Tea Party Cat




Trump Thinks The Election Will Be Rigged
Republican nominee Donald Trump on Monday raised the prospect of the general election being “rigged” against him. 
"I'm afraid the election is going to be rigged, I'm going to be honest," Trump told a crowd at an event in Columbus, Ohio.




Trump: "I didn't see Obama's speech. I was talking with Putin, who promises his hackers will deliver the election for me. Me." - Tea Party Cat




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Biz/Tech News

Donald Trump is a debit to his race.- John Fugelsang






Koch Just Says No To Trump
Billionaire Charles Koch and his network of political donors will not be supporting Republican nominee Donald Trump, instead re-directing their focus to supporting Republicans in competitive Senate races.


The best part of having the 10 commandments displayed in US courthouses is realizing 8 of them are pretty much legal here.- John Fugelsang








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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

Yes, concierge, I would like boat #22 to go and get some fresh snow for my Italian Ice.
Lago Di Braies, Italy

Peace.

Friday, July 29, 2016

Hillary has turned history into herstory. It is a shining moment she earned.

     
In the 1970s when I attended college in the South, I was labeled a conservative Democrat. I believed in rights for all, a strong military because it is a f--king dangerous world, fiscal responsibility because we needed to invest more wisely in the American people and the right to own a gun.

I still believe in those things.

When the Clintons arrived at the White House in 1993 they were also conservative Democrats with a proven track record. Of course, Republicans painted them as flaming communist Liberals, flag burners, dirty hippies and much more. Stupid, destructive politics. But it worked.

This country can only change from within and both Democrats and Republicans know that.


Hillary Clinton is becoming more and more attractive to Republicans, and not only because of Trump, I think, but because they are actually listening to her. It is about time, as she has three decades of respect from world leaders and being the most admired woman in the world for almost two decades helps, too.

The die hard Bernie supporters that are Hillary haters are just a small fraction, polls show about 90% of Bernie supporters are voting for Hillary. When Hillary lost the nomination in 2008 to Obama, polls indicated as many as 28% of Hillary supporters would vote for McCain...well that didn't happen.



Bernie turned the Democratic Party to the left in the one year he was a member of the party, which was remarkable in itself. It saddens me he decided to return to being an Independent.

Thank you Bernie. You did make a difference.

The icing on the cake -- Republican voters and politicians are realizing that a President Clinton is better than a Dicktator Trump.

Who says Hillary isn't an uniter?


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VIEWER ALERT: After Hillary's speech, the official Republican response will be delivered by Scott Baio. - Andy Borowitz



The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam


Trump Unveils Plan to Crush ISIS: 'I Know How to Bankrupt a Large Organization'- Andy Borowitz








War On Hillary Update: Her Voice
Fox News analyst Brit Hume was distracted by Hillary Clinton's "not so attractive voice" during her speech at the Democratic convention Thursday night.






"A man you can bait with a tweet is not a man we can trust with nuclear weapons." - Hillary Clinton


Republican Shenanigans






The CIA's Trump Conundrum: How do you give classified intelligence briefings to someone who's never been classified as briefly intelligent? - Warren Holstein



“Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. The hands can't hit what the eyes can't see.”
Donald Trump is living up to his reputation as thin-skinned bully.
At a Davenport, Iowa, rally on Thursday, Trump threatened to attack several of the Democratic National Convention’s speakers for their remarks against him.
“I was gonna hit one guy in particular, a very little guy,” Trump said at his rally. “I was gonna hit this guy so hard, his head would spin, he wouldn’t know what the hell happened.”




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Rock The Voter News

Hillary Clinton gave her big speech at the Democratic Convention, officially accepting the nomination for president. The speech went well, but the lightning shooting from her hands was a bit much.- Jimmy Fallon






Hack The Voter
Following the hack of Democratic National Committee emails and reports of a new cyberattack against the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, worries abound that foreign nations may be clandestinely involved in the 2016 American presidential campaign. Allegations swirl that Russia, under the direction of President Vladimir Putin, is secretly working to undermine the U.S. Democratic Party. The apparent logic is that a Donald Trump presidency would result in more pro-Russian policies. At the moment, the FBI is investigating, but no U.S. government agency has yet made a formal accusation.



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Trump is furious. Of course he's sacrificed for his country. One time he flew 1st class when his private jet was in the shop. - Warren Holstein



Biz/Tech News


Meanwhile, Back In "Consta-tushional" La La Land
Ryan Bundy demands $100 million to stand trial — or $1 million to serve as own judge
The 44-year-old Bundy, who is serving as his own attorney, filed court documents this week using “sovereign citizen” jargon to the government had no authority over him.




Donald Trump said that when he asked Russia to hack Hillary Clinton’s emails he was being “sarcastic.” Which makes sense — if anyone understands comedy, it’s the Russians.- Conan O'Brien






"Look I'm not gonna say how many pieces of silver.  It's ALOT. Believe me. These Pharisees are fantastic guys."  - Gospel of Trump  - John Fugelsang





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Odd News


Time To Deflate Photo

A1A Boulevard along Fort Lauderdale Beach, Florida, as seen from a drone.

Peace.