Benghazi !

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House rejects Dem attempt to abolish Benghazi panel
The House rejected a Democratic effort on Wednesday to abolish the Select Committee on Benghazi in the wake of recent controversial comments from Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.)...a widely criticized comment from McCarthy during a Fox News interview that suggested the panel had political benefits to attack Hillary Clinton’s presidential candidacy.



Sorry about the mean tweets you’ve been getting, @KevinMcCarthy—been there! - Hillary Clinton tweet

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• Russia backs Syrian forces in major assault on insurgents
• Netanyahu cancels German visit as Palestinian attacks surge
• Iran's supreme leader bans negotiations with the United States
• Chinese Navy makes 1st visit to Poland to strengthen ties

Look, all these mass shootings could never have happened if Obama hadn't taken away all our guns.- Tea Party Cat

Obama Apologizes For Hospital Airstrike
President Obama has apologized to Doctors Without Borders for a U.S. airstrike that killed at least 22 people at its hospital in Kunduz last weekend.
The U.S. has come under mounting pressure from the charitable organization, which has described the attack as a war crime.




Have you ever considered a career as a moderate Syrian rebel? The US military wants YOU!- Andy Borowitz

Republican Shenanigans

• Boehner Jumps In To Defend McCarthy Over Benghazi Comments
• Yes, Really: McCarthy Tells His Critics To 'Stop Playing Politics' With Benghazi
• Hatch: Chaffetz's Speaker Bid May Send Us Even Deeper Into 'Chaos'
• Okla. Guv Calls For Constitutional Amendment To Return Ten Commandments Monument
• Conan sidekick Andy Richter infuriates Twitter nutters by ripping apart their favorite gun arguments

BREAKING: After rejecting Kevin McCarthy, House GOP names zygote as new Speaker.- Tea Party Cat

Any Skeletons In The GOP Leadership Closet? 
Rep. Walter Jones (R-N.C.) wants to avoid the possibility of a member of the new House GOP leadership resigning from office because of a scandal.
In a letter to House GOP Conference Chairwoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers (R-Wash.), Jones asked that Republicans discuss urging candidates for leadership to drop out if they might one day embarrass the party because of past indiscretions.

What Will The GOP Do When There Are No More Consumers?
President Obama is standing up for average Americans by threatening to veto a Republican bill that would undo important consumer protections.




Rock The Voter News

• Clinton Finds Another Kevin McCarthy To Mock GOP Leader's Benghazi Remark (VIDEO) 
• How a team of Obama veterans helped Bernie Sanders

The right of people to keep and bear arms, to fetishize them, to carry openly, to leave unsecured around children, shall not be infringed.- Tea Party Cat

Starting this tweet with the name Kendall Jenner to trick you into reading my congrats to today's Nobel Prize winners who mapped DNA repair! -Seth McFarlane




Business/Tech News

• An early rally in US stocks fades as oil prices retreat
• 100,000 protest in Belgium against free-market measures
• Profits at big U.S. banks soar since crisis: New York Fed
• Norwegian Air CEO says $69 flights from U.S. to Europe around the corner

The #TPP is a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad deal, and Obama should've gotten better. Have I read it? No, and I don't intend to. - Tea Party Cat

Disneyland Ups Pass Prices
The Happiest Place on Earth is about to get even more pricey, and customers aren't pleased.
Disney has discontinued the Premium annual pass, which for $779 a year allowed unlimited visits to both Disneyland and Disney California Adventure as well as free parking and ...







Researchers have begun collecting data to develop a pill that will allow users to experience the benefits of exercise without having to work out. Said Americans, "So I have to get up, get a glass of water, unscrew the pill cap? No, thank you. Not interested."- Seth Myers

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Odd News

• US woman shoots at shoplifter as he flees store
• Police rescue Kentucky store owner from large python
• Dog rescued after fall into crack at Volcanoes National Park
• Tourists Flee As New Glass Walkway 3,000 Feet In The Air Cracks

Time To Deflate Photo

Luxor, Egypt. Just looking at that photo makes me feel tiny.

Peace.

Going for the W? Having George W. Bush stump for Jeb

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Going for the W? Having George W. Bush stump for Jeb 
 Jeb’s campaign is trying to figure out a strategy for deploying George W. Bush as a campaign surrogate in South Carolina. Jeb’s brother, for all his failures, remains a beloved figure on the right, which has largely convinced itself that all the economic and foreign policy wreckage he left behind can be blamed on Barack Obama.



That awkward moment when Jeb Bush is saying he's his own man and then he asks his brother to help him campaign. - Tea Party Cat

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• MSF says U.S., Afghan remarks on Kunduz point to war crime
• U.S. General: Hospital Strike Requested By Afghan Forces
• NATO says Russian ground troops in Syria, Turkey's airspace violated again
• Islamic State claims suicide attacks on Yemeni government, Gulf troops

GOP is investigating the wrong scandal.
There hasn't been a Benghazi since Benghazi.
There's a mass shooting once a day. - The Daily Edge

Thank God Obama Didn't Listen To The Chickenhawks
In a little-noticed White House video released last month, Obama insisted that he even knows exactly how many wars the United States would be in if he had listened to his hawkish GOP critics.



I better flood the world again before humans blow it all up. - The Good God Above Tweet

Republican Shenanigans

• House Speaker Boehner: House to vote Oct. 29 on new speaker
• McCarthy Issues New Statement On Benghazi Committee After Hillary Ad
•  Guy Who Said No On Sandy Aid Wants Blank Check For SC Floods
• Ann Romney on 2016 run: ‘We thought about it for 20 seconds’
• Donald Trump Agrees With Jeb Bush, Doesn’t Think the Redskins Should Change Their Name
• Trump says he has license to carry: 'Somebody attacks me, they’re gonna be shocked'

Speaker of the House John Boehner is stepping down. Probably wants to spend more time tanning with his family. - Will Durst

U.S. Congress + 40 Hour Work Week = HaHaHaHa
Rep. David Jolly (R-Fla.) wants the House schedule to more closely resemble a typical American workweek.
Jolly, who is running for Senate, has introduced a resolution to change House rules so that the chamber must be in session for at least 40 hours a week while lawmakers are in Washington. 

I read that Donald Trump's hotel chain may have experienced a data breach that may have exposed people's debit and credit card information to hackers for more than a year. When asked how he planned on fixing the situation, Trump was like, "I'm going to build a huge firewall."- Jimmy Fallon




Mexican Comedians Go After Trump
 Decked out in dark suits and outlandish blond wigs, a clutch of Mexico's most popular comedians lambasts Donald Trump as a dangerous buffoon in a new play that hits back over his anti-Mexican comments on the U.S. election campaign trail.

Who was supposed to bring the black person?

Rock The Voter News

• Justice Department about to free 6,000 prisoners, largest one-time release
• Poll: Clinton leads all Dem challengers by double-digits 
• Bernie Sanders making campaign swing through Massachusetts

The World Will End Wednesday Say Crazy Christians
While our planet may have survived September’s “blood moon”, it will be permanently destroyed on Wednesday, 7 October, a Christian organization has warned.

Halloween is this month. It’s the one day a year when children do what religions do 365 days a year: try to scare adults into giving them stuff for free! - Mrs. Betty Bowers

I vill miss Eddy.

Snowden Wants To Leave Russia And Go To Jail
Edward Snowden says he has offered to return to the United States and go to jail for leaking details of National Security Agency programs to intercept electronic communications data on a vast scale.

Business/Tech News

• Oil Rises on Growing Expectation of Production Cuts
• Big U.S. firms hold $2.1 trillion overseas to avoid taxes: study
• Florida Wants To Beef Up Stand Your Ground, Impose Financial Penalties

Clinton took unemployment from 7% to 4%
Bush from 4% to 8%
Obama has taken it from 8% to 5%. Questions? - The Daily Edge

Be Careful Where You Fly Your Drone
The Federal Aviation Administration on Tuesday proposed a record $1.9 million fine against an aerial photography company for flying drones in crowded New York and Chicago airspace without permission.




"Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act." –Truman Capote

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Here's my new 'puter! Thank you so much everyone!

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Odd News

• Woman found inside portable toilet gets arrested on warrants
• Residents of Kentucky city petition to move Halloween
• Priest accused of pointing musket at boy over football teams
• Kuwaiti with Gulf plates nabbed for 1,645 driving violations
• Man Lying In Doritos, Goldfish And Chips Ahoy Tells Cops, 'I'm Too High'

Time To Deflate Photo

I would love to be on that boat. I have no idea where this is but it looks lovely!

Peace.

The Oregon Massacre Won't Shake NRA Stranglehold

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The Oregon Massacre Won't Shake NRA Stranglehold
President Obama, stern and visibly shaken by the Oregon massacre, lambasted the NRA yet again for its suffocating grip on Congress. An equally shaken Democratic presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton, said that she was sickened by the sheep-like willingness of Congress to do the bidding of the NRA.




This country has a gun problem, but it also has an IQ problem, and the second problem makes it harder to fix the first.- Andy Borowitz

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

• Statistics Show White Supremacy is a Bigger Threat to the U.S. Than Radical Muslims
• Car bomb attacks kill 57 people in Iraq: police
• Kremlin Says Russian 'Volunteer' Forces Will Fight in Syria
• ISIS terrorists blow up Arch of Triumph in Palmyra
• White House Seeks Answers on Afghan Hospital Bombing
• Nine Dead In '1,000-Year' Flooding In South Carolina

Americans Opposed to Being Shot Seek Representation in Washington. - Andy Borowitz

Benghazi Unraveling
Democrats on the House Select Committee on Benghazi on Monday revealed portions of the transcript of previously secret testimony from a closed-door briefing with a former top aide to Hillary Clinton in an escalation of the partisan bickering on the panel.



If Jeb Bush’s flaming pile of a presidential campaign were a presidency, it would be W.'s.- The National Memo

Republican Shenanigans

• Trump: The GOP Race Would Be So Boring If I Quit
• Law Firm Representing Kim Davis Declared a Hate Group by the Southern Poverty Law Center
• Fox News host: People in Australia ‘have no freedom’ because hate speech and guns are regulated
• Mike Huckabee: Mass shootings are ‘not so much a gun problem… we have a problem with sin’
• Chaffetz challenge deepens House Republicans' disarray
• GOP New Mexico Secretary Of State Now Faces 65 Corruption Charges
• Inside The Numbers: Alabama's Free Voter ID Program Reaches Few Voters

Throwback Thursday
Speaker John Boehner is considering delaying the internal election for House majority leader and majority whip, leaving only the party vote for speaker to be decided on Thursday, according to multiple Republican sources with direct knowledge of the deliberations.

You know you break out in hot sweats when someone even suggests legislating your guns? Now imagine if you had a uterus. - LOLGOP

South Carolina Is Still Flooding
As the already soaked residents of South Carolina struggled to recover Monday from record weekend floods that caused at least eight deaths, meteorologists were warning them the downpour wasn't done.

Scientists say earth endangered by new strain of fact resistant humans.- Andy Borowitz



Death Valley Flooding
A system of slow moving thunderstorms caused flash flooding near Death Valley National Park Sunday afternoon.
According to the park’s Twitter feed, visitors were stranded throughout the park and several were stuck at the park headquarters at Furnace Creek due to debris cutting off California Highway 190 in both directions.




Rock The Voter News

• Biden to announce 2016 decision within days: report
• Governor signs 'right to die' bill in Calif.

Mitt Romney did a lot to help poor people -- for instance, he lost in 2012. - LOLGOP

How come when politicians talk about 'sealing the border' they only mean keeping Mexicans out, never keeping jobs in? - John Fugelsang

Business/Tech News

• Oil ends near two-week high on China stimulus hopes 
• Out-of-network ATM fees, overdraft charges hit record, survey says
• Burger King closes its operations in Costa Rica
• Over 8,400 NASA Apollo moon mission photos just landed online, in high-resolution

Republicans are very excited about electing a new Speaker of Shutting Down the House.- LOLGOP

Bernie Blasts New Trade Deal
Sen. Bernie Sanders labeled a new trade deal finalized by the Obama administration on Monday as “disastrous,” and said he would work to defeat it.
Sanders, the Vermont senator leading Hillary Clinton in polls of New Hampshire, said the Trans-Pacific Partnership deal will lead to the loss of U.S. jobs, adding he was “disappointed but not surprised” by the decision to complete it.



The Kardashians are America's first family, McDonald's is our top restaurant & FOX is our #1 news channel. Any questions?''' - John Fugelsang

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Soldiers working on a locomotive, Chicago, 1945.

Odd News

• Ralph Nader's Strange New Museum
• Iberia flight makes a nail-biting landing at Costa Rica's Juan Santamaría International Airport
• Infant's HEAD Reattached Following Internal Decapitation
• Hunter escapes attack by shoving arm down bear's throat
• Farmer opens barn to show woolly mammoth bones

Time To Deflate Photo

Shelter forest on both sides of the Taklimakan Desert Highway in China, is the world’s longest road through a moving desert.    By Xu Xinwen

Peace.