Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Texas Wants Its Own Fort Knox





With Eye on Fiscal Armageddon, Texas Set to 'Repatriate' Its Gold To New Texas Fort Knox
Texas wants its gold back.
On Friday, Gov. Greg Abbott signed legislation that will create a state-run gold depository in the Lone Star State – one that will attempt to rival those operated by the U.S. government inside Fort Knox and the Federal Reserve Bank of New York’s vault in lower Manhattan.




Who is your favorite Republican candidate who inherited his career from his dad?- LOLGOP








The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam




Many lawmakers on Capitol Hill wore seersucker suits to work yesterday, in honor of National Seersucker Day. In a related story, ISIS is still a huge problem, you guys.- Jimmy Fallon















Putin Puffing His Chest
Russia’s president Vladimir Putin has said that Russia would add more than 40 new intercontinental ballistic missiles to its nuclear arsenal this year, a remark that is likely to increase alarm in the West.








Jeb Bush wants to convince America that it was better off in 2008 than it is in 2015. - LOLGOP





Last Sane Republican Flips
Sen. Bob Corker (R-Tenn.) has long been one of the more moderate voices within the Republican Party when it comes to the Obama administration’s nuclear negotiations with Iran. With the June 30 deadline for a deal drawing closer, Corker is changing his tune — and potentially making it even harder for the White House to sell an eventual agreement to a skeptical Capitol Hill.
















Republican Shenanigans





Donald Trump does poll well in one area. 87% of pageant contestants say "He cares about people like me."- LOLGOP





Another Clown Car Addition
Donald J. Trump, the real estate mogul and reality television celebrity, announced Tuesday that he would seek the Republican presidential nomination.










Jeb Bush announces campaign slogan, 'Fool Me 3 Times.'- John Fugelsang










Do You Think This Guy Watches Fox News?
The father of a man who opened fire on Dallas police headquarters blames liberal policies for his son’s obsessive anger.




One Republican lying is a joke, all Republicans lying is a strategy. - LOLGOP












Rock The Voter News





There are reports that Hillary Clinton’s campaign is saving money by encouraging staffers to take discounted buses between New York and Washington. Not to be outdone, Bernie Sanders is actually Fed-Exing himself to every speech.- Jimmy Fallon















Trump Should Be Taken Seriously
Following Donald Trump’s rambling 52-minute presidential announcement Tuesday, NY1 anchor Errol Louis told CNN not to discount the celebrity plutocrat so quickly.

“I would caution everybody,” Louis said. “The first election I ever voted in, a long time ago, was in 1980. People said this B-movie actor, Ronald Reagan, was playing opposite a chimpanzee, he couldn’t possibly be a serious candidate for office.’ And he won the presidency — twice!”









Rachel Dolezal was able to pass as African-American for years, until NAACP colleagues were tipped off by her use of the phrase 'okie-dokey.'- John Fugelsang





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With a billion dollars, a reality show and a racist conspiracy theory, you too could become a contender for the GOP presidential nomination. - LOLGOP












WARNING: Viagra Users In Columbus, Ohio
One day last August, Toledo, Ohio, residents received a stark warning from city officials: Don't drink your tap water, don't wash the dishes in it, and don't bathe your kids in it. This year, it's the people of Columbus, 150 miles to the south, who got a jolt of bad news: In a large swath of the city and its suburbs, pregnant women and babies younger than 6 months of age have been advised to avoid the tap. In a warning well-designed to titillate headline writers, another group landed on the don't-drink-the-water list: Viagra users.





Business/Tech News










I'd vote for Donald Trump just to see America tell him 'You're Impeached.'- John Fugelsang




Whaaaat?
A Republican lawmaker accidentally cast his party's first vote for the California budget in years because he was distracted by Facebook.







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Odd News





Time To Deflate Photo



I have never had the yen to jump out of a plane or off a cliff, but that's just me.

Peace.

Monday, June 15, 2015

JEB'S "NEW" LOGO GETS TRASHED BY INTERNET





JEB'S "NEW" LOGO GETS TRASHED BY INTERNET
Jeb Bush unveiled his new campaign logo this weekend ahead of his official entrance into the presidential field, and it shouldn't be anything new to any longtime Floridians. It's essentially just an update of the same "Jeb!" logo he's been using for every race since 1994.





"You won't see my hair turn white in the White House, I've been dying it for years!" - Hillary Clinton











The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam




Vladimir Putin traveled to Italy to meet with Pope Francis yesterday. They say Putin should be done with confession by sometime next fall.- Jimmy Fallon











Putin Is Angry That U.S. Is Going To Do What He Has Been Doing
A plan by Washington to station tanks and heavy weapons in NATO states on Russia's border would be the most aggressive U.S. act since the Cold War, and Moscow would retaliate by beefing up its own forces, a Russian defense official said on Monday.







In Texas currently your personal safety pretty much peaks when you're a fetus and it's all downhill from there.- Andy Borowitz









Republican Shenanigans





The most Romney thing about Jeb Bush is the disbelief he exudes at the thought that anyone wouldn't want him in charge of everything.- LOLGOP










Billionaire With Car Elevator Calls Hillary A Snob
Two-time presidential candidate and former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney (R) said on Monday that Democratic contender Hillary Clinton gives off an air of chronic insincerity, no matter what her new speeches say.

"When you see her on a stage or when she comes into a room full of people, she's smiling with her mouth but her eyes say, 'Where's my latte?'" Romney said on MSNBC's "Morning Joe."





Presidential hopeful Rand Paul warned the media today that if anyone is mean to his wife during the campaign, they'll have to answer to him. And Hillary Clinton said that if anyone is mean to Bill, that’s totally fine.- Seth Myers









Rock The Voter News




BREAKING: The Supreme Court thinks 6 million Americans can wait another week or two to find out if they still have health insurance.- LOLGOP










Wow. A Win For Women's Rights
The US Supreme Court on Monday let stand an appeals court decision blocking a North Carolina law that sought to require abortion providers to conduct an ultrasound and display and describe the image to any woman considering ending her pregnancy.






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Texas is now our most pro-life state, with just seven abortion clinics and a little over ninety thousand gun stores.- Andy Borowitz










Business/Tech News





Since 1961: 28 years of GOP presidents, 28 Democratic. 

The jobs score?
GOP 24 million. 
Democrats 53 million. - LOLGOP










Roundup Banned In France
French Ecology Minister Segolene Royal announced Sunday a ban on the sale of popular weedkiller Roundup from garden centres, which the UN has warned may be carcinogenic.










Three astronauts returned to Earth today from the International Space Station after spending more than 200 days in space. Said one of the astronauts, “Bill Cosby did what?”- Seth Myers







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Odd News





Time To Deflate Photo



Almost at the bottom of the earth, Patagonia, Chile.

Peace.

Friday, June 12, 2015

Sanders floats top tax rate of over 50 percent





Sanders floats top tax rate of over 50 percent
Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), a Democratic presidential candidate, says he would support raising the tax rate on the wealthiest Americans to over 50 percent.




Hillary Clinton has joined Instagram. Meanwhile, her Democratic opponent Bernie Sanders joined telegram. - Seth Myers












The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam




North Korea Is Worried About U.S. Anthrax
North Korea accused the United States of targeting it with anthrax and asked the United Nations Security Council to investigate Washington's "biological warfare schemes" after a live anthrax sample was sent to a U.S. base in South Korea.





"Jeb Bush is taking his presidential campaign on a tour of Europe. He's telling Europeans, 'I like you guys because you're comfortable having the same family in charge for centuries.'" –Conan O"Brien









Women shouldn't be ashamed of having sex -- unless they've had sex with Jeb Bush.- Dan Savage





Republican Shenanigans









I feel like getting rid of the Iowa Straw Poll is just another way the GOP is trying to pretend Michele Bachmann never happened.- LOLGOP







Okie Senator Tells Pope To Mind His Own Business
Washington’s notorious snowball-thrower was at it again – even on a June day with forecast highs of 92 degrees – as the Senate’s most powerful environmental leader delivered a pep talk to activists who deny the science behind climate change....His message – that “God is still up there” and that Pope Francis should mind his own business – sent a clear signal to his fellow conservatives: climate sceptics have a loyal – and newly powerful – friend in Congress.










Texas to Convert Abortion Clinics to Gun Stores. - Andy Borowitz









Rock The Voter News



Thanks, Obama. Really!
Capping a weeklong defense of the Affordable Care Act, President Obama sat down with a cancer-surviving "Extra" anchor who thanked the president for saving his life.










Republican Women Begin The Hillary Attack. Correction, They Never Stopped.
Despite her gender, the Democratic frontrunner has come in for harsh attacks from women of the opposing party.
On Thursday night in Washington, Carly Fiorina, the only woman running for the Republican nomination, delivered the keynote address at a red-meat-themed event: the “Bourbon and BBQ Bash” held by the Competitive Enterprise Institute, a nonprofit that celebrates limited government and free markets. The tagline for the dinner read “Liberty served smooth and smokin’.”




Elections. How we remind America that being rich doesn't make you smart. - LOLGOP










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Gotta meet the GOP strategist who said, "Last time we weren't anti-woman or anti-gay enough. And more Bush!"- LOLGOP









Business/Tech News




...and so every nite while ur fast asleep the Iphone Fairy softly slips in and re-tangles your headphones.- John Fugelsang









Conservatives Fighting. Life Is Good.
Fox News chief Roger Ailes once reportedly called James Murdoch a "fucking dope," and has a long history of feuding with Lachlan Murdoch. Today, it was reported that they are taking over Fox News' parent company




A Nobel Prize-winning scientist was asked about female scientists, and he said, "Three things happen when they are in the lab: You fall in love with them, they fall in love with you, and when you criticize them, they cry." His funeral is Saturday.- Conan O'Brien






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Odd News






Time To Deflate Photo


The crystal clear water of Bora Bora. I hope your weekend is as beautiful as this photo.

Peace.