Tuesday, August 16, 2016

The Tweeter


Trump To Receive First Intelligence Briefing Wednesday
Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump is expected to receive his first briefing from the intelligence community on Wednesday in New York, a source familiar with the plan tells NPR.


If Republicans think calling Clinton too old & rich is slick, they shouldn't have nominated an embalmed 70-year old billionaire impersonator. - LOLGOP







The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

Obama signs executive order relocating Congress to Guantanamo Bay. - Andy Borowitz






Trump Youth Will Be Ratting On Their Own Parents
The founder of “Trump Youth” has called on young Americans to come together to fight the “parasites” of society.






Republican Shenanigans




If House Republicans really cared about perjury Oliver North would be breaking rocks in a federal pen.- John Fugelsang



That's a cigar in my hand, in case you were wondering.
Giuliani Blames Abbreviated Language For Gaffe 
Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani (R) says comments he made Monday about terrorists failing to strike the United States in the eight years before President Obama took office were misinterpreted..."You speak in somewhat abbreviated language," Giuliani said. "All human beings speak in abbreviated language at times.






Instead of givin' immigrants an "ideology test" to enter the U.S., let's give Trump supporters a literacy quiz to see if they can stay. - Tea Pain


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Foreign Donations To U.S. Elections Are Illegal. Of Course Trump Is Soliciting Them!
Donald Trump’s presidential campaign appears to be soliciting foreign donations despite multiple warnings and a criminal complaint filed with the Department of Justice.
On Sunday, an Australian member of parliament, Terri Butler, emailed The Hill the latest fundraising solicitation she’d received from the Trump campaign. 









Trump Blames Bad Poll Numbers on Existence of Numerical System. - Andy Borowitz






Rock The Voter News


The GOP Will Never Give Up On Jailing Hillary. Never.
A pair of leading House Republicans on Monday laid out detailed instructions for the Justice Department to file perjury charges against Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton.




If, as Trump suggested today, we should only allow people into the country if they support American values, he would have to leave immediately.- Andy Borowitz

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Zika's Impact On NYC 
Officials say 49 pregnant women have tested positive for Zika in New York City since April, and one baby has been born with microcephaly due to the mosquito-borne virus.
Overall, more than 3,400 at-risk pregnant women have been tested under the city's Zika action plan.





Biz/Tech News

Aetna decides that caring for their clients under Obamacare hurts their profits & dumps thousands of patients.  
Which means Obama is evil. - John Fugelsang







Tribal Members Arrested Protesting Pipeline Crossing Their Reservation
Authorities in North Dakota have arrested a dozen people protesting the $3.8 billion Dakota Access Pipeline.
Morton County Sheriff Kyle Kirchmeier said the 12 arrests as of Thursday evening were for disorderly conduct or criminal trespass.





Had a dream where evil space creatures intent on destroying humankind land, watch us for a few days, shrug, then take off.- Conan O'Brien





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Tips of all sizes gladly accepted! Thank you.
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Odd News



Time To Deflate Photo

The strange but beautiful Passiflora alata, the winged-stem passion flower, is a species of flowering plant. It is an evergreen vine, growing to 6 m (20 ft) or more, which bears an edible type of passion fruit. It is native to the Amazon, from Peru to eastern Brazil.

Peace.

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