All Hat No Cattle: The 3 Stooges

Jeb Bush Redacting Sensitive Information in Email Dump
Jeb Bush’s political action committee are redacting constituent Social Security numbers (SSNs) that were in his massive e-mail release Tuesday and they are laying the blame for the blunder squarely on the state of Florida, noting they tried to stop this from even happening last year.

Big shout out to Rick Wise for inspiring today's phototoon!

Brian Williams should do the right thing. Go to Disneyland, contract measles, then infiltrate the Kremlin and infect Putin.- Will Durst

The World Is A Safer Place Without Saddam

NO U.S. Boots On The Ground
Samantha Power, the American ambassador to the United Nations, said on Thursday that the fight against ISIS will require ground troops, "but they aren't going to be American ground troops."

Congress is now polling at 9% approval. Chlamydia is at 12% and cannibals on bath salts holding at 15%.- John Fugelsang

GOP Hopes Pinned On A Judge From Texas
All signs this morning are that Congressional Republicans have no idea how they are going to get out of the jam they've landed themselves in on funding the Department of Homeland Security. Senate and House Republicans are fighting bitterly over how to accomplish the seemingly impossible: Passing DHS funding that also rolls back Obama’s executive deportation relief through both chambers before Feb. 27th, when funding runs out.

It turns out, though, that Republicans may have an escape hatch

Republican Shenanigans

BREAKING: Ted Cruz and Steve King order all Congressional Republicans to cut off their own noses to spite Obama's face.- Tea Party Cat

Cruzin' For A Bruisin'
U.S. Senator Ted Cruz is pushing the State Marriage Defense Act, legislation that if signed into law could accomplish two objectives. First, redefine marriage at the federal level to remove from hundreds of thousands of same-sex couples the federal government's recognition of their marriages, and thus, any corresponding federal benefits they are afforded, now or in the future. And second, should the U.S. Supreme Court not find a right to marriage for same-sex couples, encourage states that do not wish to recognize those marriages to potentially nullify them.

Email
Subject: Jeb Bush

Lisa,

Bush said he was releasing his emails in a spirit of ‘transparency’ but nobody does that either. The guy is a politician first, and he would put political interests ahead of transparency any day. I think Bush was trying to force the likes of Scott Walker, Chris Christie, Rand Paul, and Rick Perry out of the race (for money) early by squeezing them to release their emails. And wouldn’t we like to read some of those guys’ emails – all their emails, not just the ones on state servers?

But, in typical Bush ready-fire-aim fashion, Jeb failed to think through the consequences of his actions. Of course, you don’t have much time to think things through when you’re sending 20 emails an hour. So there were unintended consequences – the release of personal information on thousands of people. Unintended consequences and unforced errors seem to be Bush family hallmarks.

Now Jeb has a mess to clean up, a mess that did not exist until he created it by failing to think things through and pay attention to details. Does that sound like any other Bushes we know?

Beyond that, any Chief Executive who sends an average of 86 emails a day (for 365 days a year times eight years) just does not know how a CEO should manage his/her time. I would have very little confidence in the executive abilities of anybody who spends that much time on email. Every CEO, especially the President, has better things to do than send emails.

Anyway, let’s stay tuned. There’s more fun to come.

~Rick

Thanks again for the phototoon inspiration. I am so dismayed that this country would even consider another Bush for president, just after another Democrat has cleaned up their mess!

A new report says that last year Colorado collected $44 million in marijuana taxes. Unfortunately, they can't remember where they put it.- Conan O'Brien

Rock The Voter News

Sad News For The Shrinking World Of Journalism
Veteran CBS News correspondent Bob Simon, whose decades-long career included covering major overseas conflicts and surviving Iraqi prison, was killed in a car accident on Wednesday in New York City, police and CBS said. He was 73.

Only 17% of Americans support a DHS shutdown to demand deportations -- all of them will vote in the 2016 GOP primary.- LOLGOP

Dan Rather got fired for telling the truth and Brian Williams got 6 months off for the other thing.- John Fugelsang

Business/Tech News

Next up on Fox News: Democrats choose Philadelphia for 2016 convention, thus proving they hate the other 49 states.- Tea Party Cat

Port Shutdown
The 29 ports on the U.S. West Coast were effectively closed to cargo freighters for the second time in less than a week on Thursday under a partial shutdown imposed by shipping lines and terminal operators in an escalating labor dispute with the dockworkers' union.

BREAKING: House GOP passes Keystone XL pipeline bill, including requirement that Obama apologize to Koch brothers for taking so long.- Tea Party Cat